'Abusive' boyfriend

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Blessedchild

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Dear all my boyfriend has a history of abusive father when he was not in a good mood they would hit his wife i knew that this is the reason why he is ‘abusive’, My boyfriend and i have been together for 3 years,i know how much he loves me and he is willing to sacrifice anything for me but when he was angry with me,he would raise his hand trying to hit me,but he never really hit me… this image of him trying to hit me scares me and sometimes im so afraid to even talk anything that makes him angry i love him and i hope that he would change… he eventually did it again after the third time he did it… i pray this powerful novena to Our Most Blessed Mother,i put our relationship to Her and to let Her control us especially with his anger control almost immediately after praying to Her… he changed TOTALLY… it is amazing how he changed,there was once we quarrel i knew that he is gonna explode and be angry with me but he completely puts his anger in control and i’ve got a strong feeling that It is the work of our Blessed Mother… until now no matter how we quarrel he knew how to be patient and control his anger… Please pray for me, us, our relationship and especially him so that he continue to change for the better and learn to control his anger even better and not to be abusive for me… i do really wanna married with him… and i do not wish that there is violence in our family… i wanna him to be the role model and protector of his children and me… i do really want to build a good healthy and lovely relationship with him…
thank you all
May Our Lord And His Mother Bless you :o
 
Praise the Lord.Your testimony is so touching.See the power of prayer.I will continue to pray for you;The Lord is on your side;Amen
 
Blessedchild said:
Dear all my boyfriend has a history of abusive father when he was not in a good mood they would hit his wife i knew that this is the reason why he is ‘abusive’, My boyfriend and i have been together for 3 years,i know how much he loves me and he is willing to sacrifice anything for me but when he was angry with me,he would raise his hand trying to hit me,but he never really hit me… this image of him trying to hit me scares me and sometimes im so afraid to even talk anything that makes him angry i love him and i hope that he would change… he eventually did it again after the third time he did it… i pray this powerful novena to Our Most Blessed Mother,i put our relationship to Her and to let Her control us especially with his anger control almost immediately after praying to Her… he changed TOTALLY… it is amazing how he changed,there was once we quarrel i knew that he is gonna explode and be angry with me but he completely puts his anger in control and i’ve got a strong feeling that It is the work of our Blessed Mother… until now no matter how we quarrel he knew how to be patient and control his anger… Please pray for me, us, our relationship and especially him so that he continue to change for the better and learn to control his anger even better and not to be abusive for me… i do really wanna married with him… and i do not wish that there is violence in our family… i wanna him to be the role model and protector of his children and me… i do really want to build a good healthy and lovely relationship with him…
thank you all
May Our Lord And His Mother Bless you :o
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Blessedchild,

More than anyone else, I pray for you, your safety and your overall well-being while this man is in your life. I pray that God will remember you and keep you in his hands the way he remembers the birds and the flowers.

While it is charitable of you to pray for him, I pray that you fully grasp the seriousness of your situation, which to a stranger sounds more disturbing than you seem to realise.

Your boyfriend is not abusive because his father is abusive. That’s a pity excuse. Your boyfriend’s abusive because he chose to be.

“Not-quite-hitting” you is ABUSIVE. It’s the SAME thing.

You say that after the third time of “not-quite-hitting” you, he actually-hit-you. If you stay in that relationship, it WILL continue.

God does not and will not change people. They must make a change in themselves before they can walk with him. I pray that you understand this, too.

Your boyfriend’s a coward, and his cowardice and petty excuses will drag them down too, if you allow him.

Anyone can work hard enough and provide for a family. Not everyone is capable of being a good husband and father.

You should not marry him, have children by him or even stay in your current relationship with him, at least UNTIL he makes a proveable commitment to respecting the image of God in you. I pray that you see the image of God in yourself, and realize that it is worthy of nothing less than the highest respect.

That means he cannot “actually-hit-you” or “not-quite-hit-you”, hit inatimate objects instead, call you names, embarass you, or do anything that insults the image of God in you.

God bless you.
 
Bezant said:
Blessedchild,

More than anyone else, I pray for you, your safety and your overall well-being while this man is in your life. I pray that God will remember you and keep you in his hands the way he remembers the birds and the flowers.

While it is charitable of you to pray for him, I pray that you fully grasp the seriousness of your situation, which to a stranger sounds more disturbing than you seem to realise.

Your boyfriend is not abusive because his father is abusive. That’s a pity excuse. Your boyfriend’s abusive because he chose to be.

“Not-quite-hitting” you is ABUSIVE. It’s the SAME thing.

You say that after the third time of “not-quite-hitting” you, he actually-hit-you. If you stay in that relationship, it WILL continue.

God does not and will not change people. They must make a change in themselves before they can walk with him. I pray that you understand this, too.

Your boyfriend’s a coward, and his cowardice and petty excuses will drag them down too, if you allow him.

Anyone can work hard enough and provide for a family. Not everyone is capable of being a good husband and father.

You should not marry him, have children by him or even stay in your current relationship with him, at least UNTIL he makes a proveable commitment to respecting the image of God in you. I pray that you see the image of God in yourself, and realize that it is worthy of nothing less than the highest respect.

That means he cannot “actually-hit-you” or “not-quite-hit-you”, hit inatimate objects instead, call you names, embarass you, or do anything that insults the image of God in you.

God bless you.
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i understand the seriousness of this relationship… but i believe in him and Our Blessed Mother to will guide him through… Just like Jesus said forgive and forget… Im doing exactly the same,i believe that through prayer and faith things could change for the better… thank you for your prayer
 
244Rocket said:
Praying for you and am very concerned for your safety.
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Thank you so much my dear for your prayer and continue to pray for me… and please do not worry…:o i will take care of myself… i can see he has changed alot… the power of of prayer and faith has helped us in many ways…
 
Child, I say this with all charity: please seek help for yourself. You continue with a “boyfriend” who is an abusive gambling addict who does not trust you (according to all the threads you’ve started). He has my prayers that he someday decides to overcome these things, but you have my prayers that you come to realize that he will not change just because you “love” him and want him to change. I pray most fervently that you realize this before it is too late.
 
Blessedchild said:
i understand the seriousness of this relationship… but i believe in him and Our Blessed Mother to will guide him through… Just like Jesus said forgive and forget… Im doing exactly the same,i believe that through prayer and faith things could change for the better… thank you for your prayer
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Blessedchild,

Jesus did say to forgive your enemies and their trespasses.

He never said to forget.

Prayer without action is empty. As you pray for him, you must remove yourself from a situation harmful to yourself.

God will hear your prayers and give you blessings just as abundantly if you leave an unhappy situation.

If you want him to change it is not enough to pray. Part of the solution means you have to stop giving him an oppurtunity to disrespect you.

I would recommend that you read Pslam 46: “Be still, and know that I am God.”

God blessings on you.
 
juno24 said:
Child, I say this with all charity: please seek help for yourself. You continue with a “boyfriend” who is an abusive gambling addict who does not trust you (according to all the threads you’ve started). He has my prayers that he someday decides to overcome these things, but you have my prayers that you come to realize that he will not change just because you “love” him and want him to change. I pray most fervently that you realize this before it is too late.
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THIS. You can pray for the Blessed Mother to intervene in your boyfriend’s violent outbursts. You can always love him and want what is best for him. But you shouldn’t be in a relationship with him or plan a future with him. I can’t pray that for you. I will pray for your safety and you both get the help you need, but I can not pray for a future relationship for you two.
 
May your boyfriend seek out help for his gamling addiction and his problem with anger. May our Lord help you to know that gambling and abuse are very, very bad in marriages. May our Lady intercede for your boyfriend and work wonders in his life: first, to move him to be the best Catholic he can be, and to get him to want to seek out help for his problems; then, to get him in contact with the right people to help him; then, to help him not to gamble or be abusive to you or others. Amen.
 
Please get rid of him I had boyfriend like that at one time He was so controlling did not trust me I had no friends because I was not allowed to I don’t know how old you are but I was 19 at the time when i let him go it was such a weight off my shoulder.
 
Hail Mary, full of grace, the Lord is with thee.
Blessed art thou among women and
blessed is the Fruit of thy womb, Jesus.
Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners
now and at the hour of our death. Amen.
 
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