C
Catholic80
Guest
Feeling ashamed to pray is a temptation of the devil. He wants to keep you away from God. Many, many, people struggle with masturbation. I did for years. It is possible to overcome by the grace of God and the help of the Blessed Mother. Keep doing what you are doing - pray, go to confession, and my personal suggestions, do small penances as often as you can. I say small, because the temptation can be to do big ones and get carried away with them. We think (or at least I would think) I did a big sin, and so I have to hurt myself for it, and that is unhealthy thinking. Do small things like, giving up sugar in your coffee, or not eating any sweets that day, or instead of “nots” doing extras like, going to adoration for 15 minutes a day (if you can) or reading scripture or spiritual reading for ___ minutes a day.I have been struggling with this sin for a long time. It started off as me not knowing it was bad, until about a year ago (I’ve had this addiction for about 3 years) and in all sincerity try to stop. I don’t want to hurt my relationship with God, but knowing I already have because it was a mortal sin, I don’t feel loved. I confessed to it last week, and honestly, it was one of the happiest times of my life, I wasn’t angry, upset, just happy, and felt totally at peace. However, I broke that chain of peace through my own weaknesses. I have committed it 3 times sinse last Saturday, and feel ashamed. I feel to ashamed to pray, knowing I have affected my relationship with God in such a way. I pray for protection against it, but I always just feel weak. I don’t even know if when I’m in my state of mortal sin like I am now, if God is even listening to my prayers. I feel like a shell of my old self, and before all of this happened my heart felt pure, I could actually feel peace in it. Now, I just feel dirty, impure, ungodly, like my soul is being held under a huge object. My brothers and sisters of the faith, how did you break this awful sin?
Exercise is also a great help and positive distractions, like a craft or hobby are great too in times of temptation.
Matt Fradd is a great speaker on the subject. I suggest you take a look at his website and listen to some of his talks.
Don’t be too hard on yourself, and NEVER believe that God stops loving you. God always loves you no matter what. He is there with you in your struggles every step of the way.