Addiction crisis

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brgregmack

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I’ve been acting out in compulsive unchastity off and on since February after almost 2 yrs of abstinence. For the last year, I’ve been living with my mother, since she was the only one strong enough to get us out of an alcoholic home. Even without my unchaste behaviors, this living situation stopped working.

A couple hours ago, I was on my way to act out, thinking that my mother would be away for longer. As I was walking out she was getting back, saying that she had dropped out of what she was going to. To try and put it as accurately as possible, I lied about my original reason for going to my car, but did do what I told her. When I got back into the apartment, I knew that she knew that I was lying, so when push came to shove, I told her what I was going to do, but lied about the details… and about how long these behaviors have been going on.

… So I then went for a drive in order to try and make my plan work. It fell through (thank God), so when I got home, I told her that I went for a drive, contemplating whether or not to go ahead and act out and didn’t. In the course of a heated conversation about me moving out, my anger got the best of me and a quick quip about harming her that I didn’t mean slipped. She now doesn’t want me to even spend the night here.

I don’t know whether I’m just letting off steam trying to justify myself, or trying to sort everything out by typing away, but all I know right now is that I need your prayers.:crying:
 
I will keep you in my prayers. The drive to commit sexual sins can be just as overwhelming as an addict’s craving for alcohol or drugs. As to chastity, you can have good days and bad days: you may be at peace with chastity, and then one day you are tempted to relapsed into fornication, adultery, homosexuality, etc. Prayer may be a comfort to you and help you at weak moments: www.ourcatholicprayers.com has a link entitled “Prayers for Purity.” God Bless.
 
Temptations against chastity are always hard. But do not fret, Our Lord gave us His Pure Mother so she can help us in our struggles. She is our model as she was free from stain.

O, Blessed Mother, thou are more eager to help us than we want to be help. Please cover brgregmack with your Virginal Mantle and keep him/her free from sin.

St. Philomena please pray for us!

O Most Sacred Heart of Jesus, I place all of my trust in You!
 
Memorare (Prayer to Our Lady)
Remember, O most gracious Virgin Mary, that never was it known that anyone who fled to your protection, implored your help, or sought your intercession, was left unaided.
Inspired by this confidence, I fly unto you, O Virgin of virgins, my Mother. To you do I come, before you I stand, sinful and sorrowful. O Mother of the Word Incarnate, despise not my petitions, but in your mercy, hear and answer me. Amen
We pray for healing and deliverance for your child.
 
I’m not surprised at your behavior considering the fact that you grew up in a home with a family member who was an alcoholic. Although your mother got you all out, I believe you and your family are all suffering from the effects of this illness. Living under these conditions is never easy and might have affected your self esteem. You may also harbor angry feelings as well. None of this is your fault, but I encourage you to talk to a friend or family member,or seek help from your church or an outside professional as soon as possible.

I can’t say I blame your mother for her concern over your continuing to live there, especially once it got out of control and you said words which you’re now regretting. I suppose you could apologize to your mother, but that would just be the beginning. If things don’t change at home, you may have to consider moving out, which may or may not be such a bad thing because we all have to find a way to make it in this world.

II’m sorry you had to live under the stigma of alcoholism, and I hope you reach out to the people around you for help. You can also call upon the Holy Spirit when you feel these sexual impulses come upon you. God will give you the strength for every trial, every temptation, but you have to ask for His help above all else.

God Bless
 
I pray that God gives you the strength and the fortitude to resist the temptations of your addictions. May He grant you peace, calm, understanding and patience… May He grant you understanding, knowledge and wisdom… And may He guide all your actions and days… AMEN
 
Mother Mary, I commend brgregmack to you. Please help him to resist temptation and to pray to you the moment he begins to feel tempted. I pray that he keeps away from all occasions of sin and keeps busy with spiritual things. Please intercede for him and help him to imitate your holy purity. Amen.
 
brgregmack, you might want to check out the Adult Children of Alcoholics support group. They have a couple of chapters with meetings in Boise. You can find them here: adultchildren.org/

I didn’t grow up in an alcoholic home, but I understand that it can lie at the root of many other problems in life which crop up later.

Don’t try to break your bad habits by sheer willpower. It won’t work. You need friends to lean on, people who will support you on good days and bad days. Especially if your relationship with your mother is deteriorating, you need healthy relationships.

Also depend on Heavenly support. Prayer, fasting and frequent confession are essential to break out of an unchaste lifestyle.

God bless you - I will be praying for you.
 
Thanks for all of your prayers and support!!! 🙂

I would like to mention that I do go to 12-step meetings for my addiction, have a sponsor, and am seeing a good Catholic counselor.

As for ACAA here in Boise, I’ve tried one of them… and it didn’t feel like a good fit for me. They’re approach doesn’t seem to fit real well what I’m going through. There is an Al-anon specifically for adult children that I’ve been going to, and that fits me a lot better. Seems like they’re a lot healthier and closer to the truth than the ACAA folks I’ve met.🤷
 
brgregmack said:
There is an Al-anon specifically for adult children that I’ve been going to, and that fits me a lot better.
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Glad to hear it. I hate to think of anyone fighting such major battles without resources to help.
 
louisak said:
Glad to hear it. I hate to think of anyone fighting such major battles without resources to help.
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guess you don’t live in southern CA?? I need one of those groups bad. I am like the man on this post. I have been taking a lot of extra medications that I don’t need because life has gotten to the point of that or suicide. I love my husband my mom and of course God too much to do so, but I think of it all day. I am never content. just hysterical or nodding off…it’s no life at all, and I don’t know who or how to say it to anyone:(
 
Checking in… things are better between me and my mother. I’m now looking for a job an hunting for apartments. I know this is definitely for the best. But I’m really in desperate need of a job, so I ask your prayers for both that and finding a place to live.

Thanks for all of your prayers and support thus far. I know you will continue to storm the gates of heaven on my behalf.🙂
 
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