B
Breton
Guest
I need guidance. The following are my thoughts on our parishes new program of inviting parents to serve at the altar. I want to share these with our pastor - he won’t like them - but am concerned I’m missing something or am being too petty, callous, etc… Anyway, your comments and suggestions would be appreciated.
Dear Father Joe,
Our parish apparently has a shortage of altar servers. Odd when you consider we have our own grade school with an enrollment of some 200 kids. Odder still, I believe, is how we have chosen to address the problem. Mom and dad (and any other adult I suppose) are now invited to serve with the kids in the sanctuary.
I grew up in the days of the boys-only service. My four brothers and I and many of our friends served into our high school years. No one made us serve; we just knew it was our duty. As a Catholic child, being an altar server was a “given”; it’s just something you and your friends did. My seven and four year old are already expecting to serve even though my wife and I have talked very little to them about this wonderful ministry. They simply see the boys and girls serving at mass and know, with our encouragement, that they will do it too.
No, I don’t think our problem is that we don’t have enough altar servers; I think our problem is that we don’t have enough parents out there that truly honor their marriage and baptismal vows to raise their kids in the faith. So, instead of addressing the real problem by challenging our “Catholic” parents, we feebly lower the bar so as to accommodate our ever growing, ever more acceptable, mediocrity.
Altar service is a wonderful opportunity for growth in any child’s life precisely because they are out there on their own, learning to work with other kids, the priest and deacon, learning reverence in dress and demeanor, learning accountability, learning about their faith, and all with out the safety net of mom and dad. It is an incredible community-building opportunity for the priests, deacons and lay liturgical coordinators to nurture these children along their journey to adulthood and, possibly, toward a religious vocation. The benefits are obvious.
Have we considered the possible negative impact of introducing parents into this child-only world? What twelve year old veteran won’t feel second-guessed or demoted by the addition of an adult alter server? Have we put ourselves in their shoes? How many will we run off? How many will feel left out because they don’t have parents to serve with them? Oh sure, we will have more servers if we add adults to the mix but, shouldn’t we be doing something to add more kids to the mix? Shouldn’t we be challenging the parents of our community to bring themselves and their children into a more full and conscience participation in our Catholic faith?
As a community we seem to notice when there are too few or too many plants in the sanctuary; we take pride in our beautiful campus; we are often quick to criticize the dress code at mass or the many apples in the sanctuary. I would also hope we would notice that at every mass, there seem to be fewer and fewer – if any – alter servers. And I would hope that, as a community, we would ask why that is? The answer to that question is not that we just need to start having adults serve at the altar. No, the answer is that our parents just aren’t doing their job; the job they committed to.
Let’s face it, we don’t really need any altar servers; the priest alone, or with the help of a deacon, can manage the mass. I would much rather honor and encourage those few kids that do serve - hold them up as shining examples of ministry – than let those parents off the hook that just don’t have the time to encourage and support their kids in the faith. When revenues are falling short of budget, what do we do? We stand at the ambo and ask the community to ante up. When we are short of altar servers, what do we do? I’ve never heard an appeal from the ambo specifically and passionately for parents to fulfill their Catholic responsibility by bringing their children into altar service. Why not?
Thank you.
Dear Father Joe,
Our parish apparently has a shortage of altar servers. Odd when you consider we have our own grade school with an enrollment of some 200 kids. Odder still, I believe, is how we have chosen to address the problem. Mom and dad (and any other adult I suppose) are now invited to serve with the kids in the sanctuary.
I grew up in the days of the boys-only service. My four brothers and I and many of our friends served into our high school years. No one made us serve; we just knew it was our duty. As a Catholic child, being an altar server was a “given”; it’s just something you and your friends did. My seven and four year old are already expecting to serve even though my wife and I have talked very little to them about this wonderful ministry. They simply see the boys and girls serving at mass and know, with our encouragement, that they will do it too.
No, I don’t think our problem is that we don’t have enough altar servers; I think our problem is that we don’t have enough parents out there that truly honor their marriage and baptismal vows to raise their kids in the faith. So, instead of addressing the real problem by challenging our “Catholic” parents, we feebly lower the bar so as to accommodate our ever growing, ever more acceptable, mediocrity.
Altar service is a wonderful opportunity for growth in any child’s life precisely because they are out there on their own, learning to work with other kids, the priest and deacon, learning reverence in dress and demeanor, learning accountability, learning about their faith, and all with out the safety net of mom and dad. It is an incredible community-building opportunity for the priests, deacons and lay liturgical coordinators to nurture these children along their journey to adulthood and, possibly, toward a religious vocation. The benefits are obvious.
Have we considered the possible negative impact of introducing parents into this child-only world? What twelve year old veteran won’t feel second-guessed or demoted by the addition of an adult alter server? Have we put ourselves in their shoes? How many will we run off? How many will feel left out because they don’t have parents to serve with them? Oh sure, we will have more servers if we add adults to the mix but, shouldn’t we be doing something to add more kids to the mix? Shouldn’t we be challenging the parents of our community to bring themselves and their children into a more full and conscience participation in our Catholic faith?
As a community we seem to notice when there are too few or too many plants in the sanctuary; we take pride in our beautiful campus; we are often quick to criticize the dress code at mass or the many apples in the sanctuary. I would also hope we would notice that at every mass, there seem to be fewer and fewer – if any – alter servers. And I would hope that, as a community, we would ask why that is? The answer to that question is not that we just need to start having adults serve at the altar. No, the answer is that our parents just aren’t doing their job; the job they committed to.
Let’s face it, we don’t really need any altar servers; the priest alone, or with the help of a deacon, can manage the mass. I would much rather honor and encourage those few kids that do serve - hold them up as shining examples of ministry – than let those parents off the hook that just don’t have the time to encourage and support their kids in the faith. When revenues are falling short of budget, what do we do? We stand at the ambo and ask the community to ante up. When we are short of altar servers, what do we do? I’ve never heard an appeal from the ambo specifically and passionately for parents to fulfill their Catholic responsibility by bringing their children into altar service. Why not?
Thank you.
adult women and non-instituted adult men would also be Extraordinary Acolytes, rather lay people serving the function of Acolytes.
