Advice on my dad and the Eucharist

[flightkid]

Hello,

My dad and I are both Catholic…for a brief period of my life I fell away from the Catholic Faith and out of respect when I did got to Church with the family I would refrain from taking the Eucharist. Now I am back into the faith with passion and zeal. My father only comes to Church on Xmas and Easter and partakes in the Eucharist. I feel like that it is not right for him to partake in the Eucharist since it shows disunity…Should I say something or not? I do not want to be the Eucharist police…I am just unsure of what to say and how to say it without hurting his feelings…and maybe I should not say anything…I pray for him that he practices the faith, but I need some advice. Thank you!

 

[kslat]

As Catholics are obligated to attend Mass on Sundays, if your father does not attend Mass on Sundays and does not have a dispensation, he is sinning by not attending. Thus, he should not receive the Eucharist (in fact, doing so after having committed a mortal sin, which not attending Mass is, in the case that he knows the gravity of his actions and fails to attend mass anyway, is a mortal sin). Then again, if he does not know that he is committing these sins, it is not mortal, but it is still grave. As we are expected to assist other Catholics in their faith, I think it would be good for you to mention it to him. Maybe ask, “Hey, Dad, so I’ve noticed that you don’t go to Mass on Sundays. Did you know that’s a mortal sin? And did you know that you’re not supposed to receive the Eucharist if you’ve committed a mortal sin?” I mean, be as charitable as possible. I assume he doesn’t realize the gravity of his actions. You might suggest, charitably, that he receive the sacrament of penance. (Maybe you can even go with him–that is, invite him to go with you.) The discussions we need to have aren’t always easy, and he might accuse you of prying or being nosy, but be sure he knows that you are discussing it with him because you care about him.

(I’m not very good at explaining mortal sin and grave sins and such. I apologize if any of this is not accurate.)

God bless. I hope your discussion, should you have it, goes well and that no feelings are hurt.

 

[Reuben_J]

Hello,

My dad and I are both Catholic…for a brief period of my life I fell away from the Catholic Faith and out of respect when I did got to Church with the family I would refrain from taking the Eucharist. Now I am back into the faith with passion and zeal. My father only comes to Church on Xmas and Easter and partakes in the Eucharist. I feel like that it is not right for him to partake in the Eucharist since it shows disunity…Should I say something or not? I do not want to be the Eucharist police…I am just unsure of what to say and how to say it without hurting his feelings…and maybe I should not say anything…I pray for him that he practices the faith, but I need some advice. Thank you!

Hi, look at it in term of the minimum requirement. If your dad also goes for confession, he has every right to receive the Holy Communion, especially on Christmas and Easter. At least he still sees the importance of the events.

You could make Sunday mass a family event, like maybe making an appointment with dad to have lunch together after mass on Sunday. Choose a nice place or go somewhere to make it more of an event. Pay for the occasion if you can afford to or pick him up if you do not stay with him in the same house. Well, it is only once a week and besides what a great way to build relationship. Hopefully the habit (going for mass) will pick up after a while.

Witnessing is an investment even if it is to our own family members.

 

[flightkid]

thank you for your responses. Yes I am not sure of my fathers conscience and I do not intend to figure what he fully understands and does not so I like how you have recommended of just talking with him on these points and so forth…My Father will only go to mass two times a year, but will always take the Eucharist and I know he does not go to confession as well…I just did not know what would be acceptable in policing the Eucharist or even if i should…thank you and if there are any more comments or guidance it would be appreciated…I will try to chat with him with humility and gentleness…

 

[Newbie2]

thank you for your responses. Yes I am not sure of my fathers conscience and I do not intend to figure what he fully understands and does not so I like how you have recommended of just talking with him on these points and so forth…My Father will only go to mass two times a year, but will always take the Eucharist and I know he does not go to confession as well…I just did not know what would be acceptable in policing the Eucharist or even if i should…thank you and if there are any more comments or guidance it would be appreciated…I will try to chat with him with humility and gentleness…

Touchy situation. I’d say in most circumstances it’s more likely to be better accepted as a suggestion to do “X” rather than an admonition not to do “Y”. In other words, perhaps a suggestion to go to mass sometime other than C or E would be better accepted, or at least plant a seed better than saying something like he really shouldn’t participate in the Eucharist without first going to confession.