Advice: Possible Vocation to Religious Life

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LuxDei

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Hi everyone,

I posted something very similar to this thread on the Prayer Intentions board, so if you already saw it there, feel free to ignore this one. Basically, this is my situation:

For a long time I have felt a pull towards the religious life (well, for me, a long time means since I started RCIA…I was received into the Church on 9/16 of this year), particularly something along the lines of the Missionaries of Charity (Bl. Mother Theresa’s order that serves the worldwide “poorest of the poor,” in her words). However, before my recent conversion to Catholicism, I had been planning to marry my boyfriend (whom I have been dating for over 4.5 years, but we’re only 20, which is why we hadn’t married yet). He is a wonderful young man with whom I would be blessed to spend my life. I had been running away from any thoughts of the religious life for fear of hurting him…He has been abandoned by many loved ones in his life.

Today (10/4) I got up the nerve to ask how he would feel/what he would do if I were to pursue the religious life instead of marriage with him. Much to my (pleasant) surprise, he said that although he would be sad and struggle with it for a while, he thinks it’s a such a noble thing to do that he wouldn’t resent me or God over it (that last part was important to me because he isn’t overly interested in religion or God, and I didn’t want to drive him even further away if I did this) and that he believes he would still eventually find happiness. And I feel that that was a sign from God that I need to look into this.

(Another sign: When I called my grandma to tell her, because she and I are really close especially in matters of faith, she informed me that today is the anniversary of her brother’s (aka my great uncle’s) ordination as a deacon!)

I feel so overjoyed to be able to finally say “Your will, Lord, not mine” WITHOUT reservations…I really will do whatever I determine He’s calling me to do, whether it fits into these two ideas I have now or not. But I also feel uneasy and scared (for myself and for my boyfriend) now that our dreams and plans which mean so much to us might not be what’s going to happen after all. I really feel a simultaneous and STRONG pull in BOTH directions. I have no clue what to do…

As I said, he is an amazing man, and I would never want to marry/raise a family with anyone else if that is indeed where God is calling me…I know we could have a wonderful marriage and hopefully help God in the work of creation (I LOVE children and have always dreamed of being a mother). But I want to discern whether that IS where He’s calling me or not…I could also see myself finding great peace and joy in giving myself to God and others in a different way, like becoming a member of an order similar to (or the actual one) the Missionaries of Charity and going abroad to serve the needy. Maybe I am called to marriage, and I would be thrilled to marry him and raise a big Catholic family (God willing), but I just know that if I went that route without ever fully surrendering my will to God’s and checking out this OTHER possibility, I would spend my life wondering what could have been and if this was my true calling.

So, does anyone have any advice? I mean, I’ve heard of people leaving relationships to follow a vocation elsewhere, but I don’t think I’ve heard of too many people in a situation where they were deeply in love with someone and looking forward to marrying them/raising a family when they felt a call to the religious life.

I have contacted the vocations director in my diocese, and am planning to ask my former RCIA director if she could either be my spiritual adviser or direct me to someone who could. And of course, I’m going to be praying a LOT. So, don’t worry, I’m not going to rely COMPLETELY on you guys. I’m just curious what you all have to say at this very early stage in my discernment process.

Thanks so much, and God bless all of you,
LuxDei
 
Well, my experience was the other way, as I took a ‘break’ after my postulancy and then went on to meet my husband, and father of my 2 girls.

But…when I was in the monastery we had one novice, called Sr Clara, who once showed me a picture of her and her fiance, to whom she’d been engaged for 4 years…During this time she found she had a strong vocation to become a contemplative nun, after a chance visit to the chapel of our monastery. She said to me ‘I knew I’d come home!’. She eventually broke off her engagement and entered our monastery at the age of 26. Now 10 years on, she’s a fully professed contemplative Benedictine nun, and to me and everybody who has met her, it is absolutely clear she made the right choice!

I, on the other hand, though I felt called, always doubted…and after a year of postulancy, decided I needed to think things through before being clothed and joining the noviciate. When I lay eyes on my husband for the first time, I remember a voice in my head saying ‘He is the One’, and he -who had left seminary 4 years previously because he couldn’t overcome the feeling that he wanted to marry and have children- says he had a similar experience. We’ve been together 8 years now, married 6 1/2 and I have no doubt it was the right choice for us!

So…it can go both ways…Pray about it, try and find a monastery or convent that will allow you to stay with them on a ‘come-and-see’ weekend, so you can experience life as a potential candidate. Then go back for a week or two…Then make a decision. Because by then you’ll know…Prayers for your discernment!

Anna x
 
Hi again LuxDei…First, I think your boyfriend is an amazing and wonderful person. I also think you are right to very seriously consider religious life. Over and above that, you are doing the very best thing that you can in contacting the diocesan vocations director re spiritual direction. Be guided by either. Certainly persist in looking for a spiritual director. Keeping you in prayer…Blessings and Peace…Barb:)
 
Thanks for all your help so far, everyone; I have been reading your posts with great interest and gratitude.

Well, I broke down in tears several times today thinking of this one scene that kept playing in my head of saying goodbye to Eric to pursue a vocation other than marriage. I know he loves me more than any other human being ever could, and I just think of him hugging me tight and smelling my hair and expressing something sad that I can’t put into real words. I’m crying again just typing it.

And later I did a google search about discerning vocations, and a talk by Fr. Larry Richards called “Your Life, His Call” came up. I downloaded it and said a prayer that God would speak to me through this to help me discern things. Well, he was talking about marriage and how God doesn’t want you to marry someone unless that person loves Jesus more than you. Despite all the ways he’s made me a better person (more patient, loving, trusting, etc.) over the years, that’s not true of my boyfriend…he isn’t interested in religion much at all.

And then around minute 47 he said everyone should see this movie called “City of Joy” and went on to explain it a little. (Now, I think I mentioned above, the order I feel a particular pull towards is Bl. Mother Teresa’s order, the Missionaries of Charity.) So he’s talking and he just nonchalantly says “blah blah blah and he goes to the City of Joy, which is Calcutta…” and I nearly fell out of my chair. Of course, since I’m a cry-er, I started bawling (from shock, anxiety about surrendering to God, sadness about leaving my boyfriend and my intentions for marriage/a family with him, etc.), but I just kept “Lord, Your will, not mine.” And I felt my heart start to move.

BUT THEN, AS IF THAT WASN’T ENOUGH SHOCKING MOMENTS FOR ONE EVENING, Fr. Larry starts telling a story about a kid who told God “If you want me to be a priest, tell me. I’m going to open the Bible and if I see the word “priesthood” on the page, I’ll be a priest.” So he opened it and read the page and didn’t see the word and said “PHEW!” But then he moved his thumb off the page. And under this thumb was the word “priesthood.” So they guy said “I’ve gotta become a priest.” Fr. Larry said that was “stupid” and not to look for “magic” and silly things like that when you’re trying to discern the will of God, which is basically what happened several minutes before. Although it sounded like that guy didn’t really feel called, he was just trying to make sure God didn’t want that of him, which is NOT my case.

EDIT NOW, like one minute before the end of the program, he told the story of a man who was engaged and then had a moving experience and broke it off to become a priest.

THEN I went to Fr. John Corapi’s website, and the featured product was his DVD on “The Sanctity of Marriage.” SO MANY CONFLICTING THINGGGGS…

Sigh. I’m so confused. :confused: I guess I’m just being impatient here. Maybe I should take Fr. Larry’s advice and stop looking for “magical” signs to help me; after all, if you’re searching for signs around every corner, you’re going to invent them. I’m going to make myself crazy here! But some of those things seem downright uncanny to me, particularly the thing where Fr. Larry HAPPENED to mention Calcutta…Please, any more advice or insights would be much much much appreciated.

God bless all of you.
 
Good point not to look for magical type signs for sure! You are taking the best road by speaking to the vocations director re spiritual direction. Experience has taught me that the more I seek advice the more potential there might be to get even more confused over matters. Try to keep yourself in Peace and trust with confidence that God will indeed let you know the way to go…in His Time, which long experience has taught me just *may not *have nothing to do with one’s own timeframe. My take on things is that you will really profit from spritual direction. You have a conflict going between two attractions that are on opposite poles - your wonderful boyfriend (for sure!) and on the other end, a potential vocation to religious life - equally wonderful for sure. The conflict needs resolution, of course, and I think you need help to resolve it - spiritual help. Keeping you in prayer…Barb:)
 
Thanks Barb…I will indeed keep you in my prayers.

I’m so thick-skulled that I STILL wasn’t done “looking for signs” after I posted last night, and I got my Bible and decided to just open it to a page and let God speak to me that way. Well first it was a place in Hebrews about how when God speaks, we must not harden our hearts. So I was like “Okay, I won’t, I just want to know what he’s saying!” And then I put the Bible away. Sitting there I was reminded of how St. Therese had such a love of the Gospels and said they always helped her, so I thought, “Wellllll, I’ll give it one more shot and see what Jesus Himself has to say.” So I picked Luke, because I’ve always loved his Gospel in a special way. When I opened it, the first thing my eyes fell on was Luke 10 …


…The sending out of the seventy-two. “The harvest is abundant but the laborers are few” and then He sends out the men, who are not supposed to carry any money or anything and are told to go from town to town spreading the Good News and curing the sick and what not.

Tell me THAT’S a coincidence. Sigh. I’m gonna try to really stop looking for magic now. I’d love to do either thing, I’m just very uncomfortable not KNOWING which thing God wants. And I worry that if I keep spending time with my boyfriend, which I know probably won’t keep me from looking into this since my passion for it is so great, it will only hurt him more, like I’m just stringing him along or something. Fear of hurting him is the main reason I’m having trouble saying “Your will IN YOUR TIME, Lord.” Because if I string him along and then decide to pursue a vocation to the religious life, all this time he could have been working on getting over me and deciding what to do with his life. And if I tell him we can’t see each other anymore and later decide my vocation IS to marriage, then what? He’d have been depressed without me for all that time wondering if I was going to come back to him or not. Plus, Fr. Larry said you have to ask God if this is the person He wants you to marry, and I have never tried to discern that. I just assumed that since he’s such a wonderful guy who loves me and has made me a better person and we’ve been together for over 1/5 of our lives already, he was the one. But like I said above, he doesn’t care about religion. And I don’t know what that means as far as if he’s the one God wants for me. BUT maybe if I married him, I could bring him closer to the Lord over time and be an instrument in his faith journey. Who knows.

ARGH ARGH ARGH Thank goodness I’m meeting with my spiritual director Monday. God bless, all.
 
Thanks Barb…I will indeed keep you in my prayers.

I’m so thick-skulled that I STILL wasn’t done “looking for signs” after I posted last night, and I got my Bible and decided to just open it to a page and let God speak to me that way. Well first it was a place in Hebrews about how when God speaks, we must not harden our hearts. So I was like “Okay, I won’t, I just want to know what he’s saying!” And then I put the Bible away. Sitting there I was reminded of how St. Therese had such a love of the Gospels and said they always helped her, so I thought, “Wellllll, I’ll give it one more shot and see what Jesus Himself has to say.” So I picked Luke, because I’ve always loved his Gospel in a special way. When I opened it, the first thing my eyes fell on was Luke 10 …


…The sending out of the seventy-two. “The harvest is abundant but the laborers are few” and then He sends out the men, who are not supposed to carry any money or anything and are told to go from town to town spreading the Good News and curing the sick and what not.

Tell me THAT’S a coincidence. Sigh. I’m gonna try to really stop looking for magic now. I’d love to do either thing, I’m just very uncomfortable not KNOWING which thing God wants. And I worry that if I keep spending time with my boyfriend, which I know probably won’t keep me from looking into this since my passion for it is so great, it will only hurt him more, like I’m just stringing him along or something. Fear of hurting him is the main reason I’m having trouble saying “Your will IN YOUR TIME, Lord.” Because if I string him along and then decide to pursue a vocation to the religious life, all this time he could have been working on getting over me and deciding what to do with his life. And if I tell him we can’t see each other anymore and later decide my vocation IS to marriage, then what? He’d have been depressed without me for all that time wondering if I was going to come back to him or not. Plus, Fr. Larry said you have to ask God if this is the person He wants you to marry, and I have never tried to discern that. I just assumed that since he’s such a wonderful guy who loves me and has made me a better person and we’ve been together for over 1/5 of our lives already, he was the one. But like I said above, he doesn’t care about religion. And I don’t know what that means as far as if he’s the one God wants for me. BUT maybe if I married him, I could bring him closer to the Lord over time and be an instrument in his faith journey. Who knows.

ARGH ARGH ARGH Thank goodness I’m meeting with my spiritual director Monday. God bless, all.
Hi again LD…I feel for you. I am wondering if the intensity and love that has you attracted to a cloister would be fully happy married to someone who “doesn’t care about religion”…the other point I picked up is that it is a fatal mistake to get married thinking one can change a person. Of course, it is not impossible that change could take place.
But as I said in previous posts, I really think you need spiritual direction to resolve the conflict - and there is a world of difference between typing to people…and face to face contact. The former is a limited means of communication, while the latter is what we were made for and with face to face contact and in a spiritual direction setting, Father would come to know you far far better than any person exchanging written communications with you could.

I will be keeping you in prayer…Blessings and God’s Peace and my regards…Barb:) 👍
 
Hi again LD…I feel for you. I am wondering if the intensity and love that has you attracted to a cloister would be fully happy married to someone who “doesn’t care about religion”…the other point I picked up is that it is a fatal mistake to get married thinking one can change a person. Of course, it is not impossible that change could take place.
But as I said in previous posts, I really think you need spiritual direction to resolve the conflict - and there is a world of difference between typing to people…and face to face contact. The former is a limited means of communication, while the latter is what we were made for and with face to face contact and in a spiritual direction setting, Father would come to know you far far better than any person exchanging written communications with you could.

I will be keeping you in prayer…Blessings and God’s Peace and my regards…Barb:) 👍
Hey Barb,

Thanks for your response…first of all, I sincerely doubt God would ever call me to cloistered life…I’m talking about something along the lines of Bl. Mother Teresa’s order, as I think I mentioned a few times…Something where I’m out in the world helping people and talking to people…I’m way to talkative and too much of a people person to live a completely secluded life, I think. But who knows…If I discern somehow that that’s God’s call, then I’ll follow it.

And as far as the boyfriend…Yeah, I know what you mean about the first part. And the second part isn’t really that I HOPE I’ll change him so much as I’m trying to take into account the idea that God might be planning to use me that way. I mean, who knows, maybe we’ll have like 8 kids and 5 of them will become priests/religious or something! I know that’s unlikely, but I’m just sayin…You never know. My uncle who’s a deacon told me he didn’t care much about religion when he married my aunt; it was her love and non-nagging persistence in her own faith that turned his heart. And now his homilies regularly bring people to tears, so clearly HER faith and marriage to an unreligious guy has brought about not only the deepening of his faith, but as a consequence, the deepening of many other people’s faiths as well. Not saying that’s probable, just possible, and a reason I shouldn’t dismiss the idea of a vocation to marriage with him. Plus, he isn’t RESISTANT to religion and has said he’ll back me raising our kids Catholic and stuff. And although Eric isn’t “religious” himself per say, he is a much better, more virtuous person than I was when we met, and he has made me better/more virtuous just by being near him. I dunno…If God was calling me to marriage but NOT to Eric, I don’t understand why he would have put him in my life for so long. I mean, if I’m supposed to leave him to become a religious, okay I understand that he taught me how to love more selflessly and everything and I’ll need that to serve the poor/ill/needy, but if I’m just supposed to marry someone else, that makes no sense to me…Why should he have had to put up with me for all this time (I’m not exaggerating; I had REAL problems, and he stuck by me and helped me through and loved me the whole way) and made me into a better person only so I can break his heart and marry someone more churchy? That seems terribly selfish on my part. Maybe that was all just excuses. Who knows.

Well, I hope you know I really do appreciate your advice. I have an appointment with my spiritual director tomorrow (face to face, of course 😛 ). Hopefully she can shed some light on things…She knows and respects Eric, and she knows me very well. So we’ll see.

I’m still struggling to understand how I’m supposed to HEAR God if it isn’t through my flighty, back and forth emotions OR the “magic signs” I’ve been looking for. I hope she can help.

God bless again.
 
Quoting LuxDei
Thanks for your response…first of all, I sincerely doubt God would ever call me to cloistered life…I’m talking about something along the lines of Bl. Mother Teresa’s order, as I think I mentioned a few times…Something where I’m out in the world helping people and talking to people…I’m way to talkative and too much of a people person to live a completely secluded life, I think. But who knows…If I discern somehow that that’s God’s call, then I’ll follow it.
Hey LD:coffeeread: …Greetings!..For whatever vocation God may call us to, He provides the Graces and of course one’s disposition can be part of that. It is said that there are three indications of potential vocation to religious life:

  1. *]Attraction to the life
    *]Health and ability to live the life
    *]Acceptance by a religious order
    …in other words, God provides these three things where a potential vocation could be indicated … with “potential” operative. There may well be exclusions to this…but the existence of these three matters in the majority of cases is really what proves the rule.
    And as far as the boyfriend…Yeah, I know what you mean about the first part. And the second part isn’t really that I HOPE I’ll change him so much as I’m trying to take into account the idea that God might be planning to use me that way. I mean, who knows, maybe we’ll have like 8 kids and 5 of them will become priests/religious or something! I know that’s unlikely, but I’m just sayin…You never know. My uncle who’s a deacon told me he didn’t care much about religion when he married my aunt; it was her love and non-nagging persistence in her own faith that turned his heart. And now his homilies regularly bring people to tears, so clearly HER faith and marriage to an unreligious guy has brought about not only the deepening of his faith, but as a consequence, the deepening of many other people’s faiths as well. Not saying that’s probable, just possible, and a reason I shouldn’t dismiss the idea of a vocation to marriage with him. Plus, he isn’t RESISTANT to religion and has said he’ll back me raising our kids Catholic and stuff. And although Eric isn’t “religious” himself per say, he is a much better, more virtuous person than I was when we met, and he has made me better/more virtuous just by being near him. I dunno…If God was calling me to marriage but NOT to Eric, I don’t understand why he would have put him in my life for so long.
    God’s ways can indeed be strange, but I think you are right to ask yourself serious question about this man. He sounds like a really great person. Another question - Are you in love with him?..and perhaps make a list of where you are both compatible and where you are not. To list pro’s and con’s can be very helpful in arriving at a decision. We need good and strong marriages and children who will be strong in the Faith…and we also need good and strong religious vocations. This is what as a Church we need. But it is not really a question of who needs what, but what God may be calling you to.
    Well, I hope you know I really do appreciate your advice. I have an appointment with my spiritual director tomorrow (face to face, of course 😛 ). Hopefully she can shed some light on things…She knows and respects Eric, and she knows me very well. So we’ll see.

    I’m still struggling to understand how I’m supposed to HEAR God if it isn’t through my flighty, back and forth emotions OR the “magic signs” I’ve been looking for. I hope she can help.
    How you hear God is that in your heart you know…there may be fears and reservations, doubts etc. in the mind, but you know where your heart is leaning. You may not be there as yet and this simply means the discernment process is still ongoing. Any advice etc. I may offer is limited and totally limited in the light of your having a spiritual director. Be guided by her… weighing up what she has to say. As I think I said before, you have two great attractions for you life - both are mutually exclusive, and you will need to decide between the two - and in the final analysis it is your choice alone responding to what you discern as God’s Will for your life. There is no time limit on this discerning process within the bounds of common sense of course.
    I am wondering if you have been in touch with Mother Teresa’s Order and asked them questions about their life…you would not be commiting yourself merely making enquiries.
    My take would be the more informed you are and can hence discuss with your director, in all likelihood any decision you arrive at will be an informed one -… mmmm I guess that makes obvious sense:o

    May God Bless you in His Peace…Barb:)
 
Good advice…and for the record, to answer your question, I am definitely in love with him. He’s the first person that I’ve ever known whose well-being and happiness mean more to me than my own. And we’ve proven to be very compatible over the 4.5 years we’ve been together, and when we aren’t we’ve always found a satisfying compromise.

I’m about to leave for the spiritual director…I’ll report back later =)

And yeah, I got the US branch of the MC’s number, and I was going to call and ask them to send me some info if they could.

God bless!
LuxDei
 
Good advice…and for the record, to answer your question, I am definitely in love with him. He’s the first person that I’ve ever known whose well-being and happiness mean more to me than my own. And we’ve proven to be very compatible over the 4.5 years we’ve been together, and when we aren’t we’ve always found a satisfying compromise.

I’m about to leave for the spiritual director…I’ll report back later =)

And yeah, I got the US branch of the MC’s number, and I was going to call and ask them to send me some info if they could.

God bless!
LuxDei
Hi again!..Another good question to ask oneself if considering marraige to a particular person:

“What needs does he have and can I meet them?”

Very often, not saying it is so in your case, we are aware of our own needs and that the prospective partner can meet them, but never ask ourselves can I meet their needs and what are those needs…although you sound very in tune with each other to me, but I thought I would write it anyway.

Good that you are going to contact the Missionaries of Charity - remember that an enquiry is only an enquiry with no commitment attached to it…some Orders I know can be very ‘pushy’ where an enquiry is concerned.
One amusing little story I know of is a nun whi has been in enclosed contemplative life now for many many years. She had been daunted by the idea of becoming a nun fascinated by a monastery near her. So she decided to visit them…and came away, and in shock, with the date she was to enter. She had not intention at all for things to go that far!!!😉
My brother incidentally was headed for the seminary and then met a young woman who wanted to be a Dominican nun…they married and have four beautiful children - now adults with two at university. To fall in love is a wondrous gift of God - for God is Love. Hence falling in love is the gift of God of Himself.

But I think that you are doing all the right things. God’s Blessings with your director, I see mine today also and will be thinking and praying for you- its a one and half hour bus trip there and then back again for me, so plenty of space for prayer. Do be guided by your director, who knows far more about you - far more - than me as a CAF member…and all CAF members I would venture to state in all probability. Sometimes seeking advice here and there can create a situation where we become more confused than we were when we started to ask advice from various quarters - and our plan had been to become less confused.

I will be thinking of and praying for you…

Blessings…Peace…regards - Barb:)
 
Thank you so much, Barb.

Strangely enough, I think I had an epiphany this afternoon when I was talking with him about all these usual things. Mainly because he referred to my faith as “fanaticism,” and I had never heard him voice opposition like that before. It just kind of hit me that neither of us would be happy in a marriage where faith means so much to me and so little to him; he would feel constantly annoyed by my interest in/fervor for faith/religion, and I would be heartbroken having to spiritually raise our kids alone, not to mention not being able to share my faith with my own spouse.

So we came to a mutual decision that despite how much we love each other, we wouldn’t be happy married, and we have decided to break up. I’m of course very sad, more out of worry for him than out of concern for myself, but I know I’ll make it. And I feel a strange sense of peace…like I don’t have to try to make excuses for him anymore, and like a lot of new doors just opened. I’ll be praying for him though…I really don’t want him to be hurting.

And this discernment situation has just gotten a LOT easier. Now I can honestly ask the question “What does God want of me?” without any worries about hurting other people or any factors playing in such as a comfort zone…After all, no matter which path I discern, NOW it’ll involve a completely new experience either way.

So, I thought I should definitely update this thread about that, especially for you Barb. My spiritual director was indeed very helpful. I will continue to pray and try to discern God’s will for me as well as to say “yes” to Him every chance I get.

God bless you!
 
Strangely enough, I think I had an epiphany this afternoon when I was talking with him about all these usual things. Mainly because he referred to my faith as “fanaticism,” and I had never heard him voice opposition like that before. It just kind of hit me that neither of us would be happy in a marriage where faith means so much to me and so little to him; he would feel constantly annoyed by my interest in/fervor for faith/religion, and I would be heartbroken having to spiritually raise our kids alone, not to mention not being able to share my faith with my own spouse.
It seems, LD, that Divine Providence has taken matters in hand and resolved the conflict.
So we came to a mutual decision that despite how much we love each other, we wouldn’t be happy married, and we have decided to break up. I’m of course very sad, more out of worry for him than out of concern for myself, but I know I’ll make it. And I feel a strange sense of peace…like I don’t have to try to make excuses for him anymore, and like a lot of new doors just opened. I’ll be praying for him though…I really don’t want him to be hurting.
I think probably the sense of peace comes from the conflict having been resolved which would have been the creater of tension and stress. I will pray for him too that he will resolve matters fully and arrive at Peace.
And this discernment situation has just gotten a LOT easier. Now I can honestly ask the question “What does God want of me?” without any worries about hurting other people or any factors playing in such as a comfort zone…After all, no matter which path I discern, NOW it’ll involve a completely new experience either way.
I will continue to pray for you and for your ex boyfriend.
So, I thought I should definitely update this thread about that, especially for you Barb. My spiritual director was indeed very helpful. I will continue to pray and try to discern God’s will for me as well as to say “yes” to Him every chance I get.
May The Lord every grant you the Grace to insight to know His Will and to respond.
Thank you for the update, and I will be very interested for every update and see how things unfold for you. You can always PM me if you prefer privacy.
I am very happy that your spiritual director was very helpful…always be guided by her and over and above all others, keeping her in prayer. Of course, there is always the possible exception to this that only serves to prove the rule. But The Lord will never ever allow you to stray through listening to and harkening the advice of your spiritual director.

God’s Blessings and His Peace…Barb:)
 
I suggest you spend some time living the sacramental life of the Church as a lay woman. The religious life is a great vocation- and it may be yours, but marriage is great too- and that may be yours. Sometimes the enthusiasm for newly discovered faith can be confused with a religious vocation. Sometimes, however, it is the beginning of the true calling. Keep faithful to prayer and find a good spiritual director.
 
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