Advice/Prayers welcome

[TheSpider]

Hello all, I thought I’d seek any help advice here and hope for positive advice, as this is a very personal and emotional post for me to share.

First, I have been saved. I’ve accepted Jesus as my lord and savior, confessed with my mouth and believe in my heart that he is Lord of all. However, I am a gay man and during my younger years, out of spite and anger, for the way that I am. I did stray from God and practiced a number of religions to try and fill that void. Naturally they only provided temporary relief and i always found my way back to God. He never gave up on me.

However, one night. Quite a long time ago. I was watching some sort of religious documentary and I offered my soul to the devil. Again, out of anger and resentment. I quickly realized what I had done and got on my hands and knees and begged for God’s forgiveness and asked for his mercy.

From what I’ve read since I have been saved, my soul belongs to God now and nothing and no one can take that away from me. However, ever since then, I’ve always been scared, that I’ve doomed myself even though I’m a faithful Christian (I do have my faults as we all do) I’m working on my prayer life and I do believe God is with me, helping me through this but I’ll admit I’m plagued at times by disgusting thoughts, degrading myself and God, I feel at times the Devil is trying to weasel his way in. I do fight it, but it gets so exhausting and I feel like perhaps this is my punishment.

I’d love your thoughts on this matter, advice, and prayer. Thank you for reading my story.

 

[Mi3hael]

Thanks for sharing your story, stay strong and prayers are with you

 

[drac16]

Romans 8:1 says “There is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus”. Don’t let the devil ruin your mind. You belong to Christ and He loves you. I’m praying for you. May the Lord strengthen your faith and keep you safe from the devil’s whispers.

 

[TeenCatholicGuy]

If I may ask, are you Catholic or have taken any of the sacraments?

I could offer a lot better advice if I knew ;(

You don’t have to share if you don’t want to, but I’ll Pray for you regardless.

 

[eatpraylove11]

Hail Mary, full of grace,
The Lord is with Thee;
Blessed art thou among women,
And blessed is the fruit of thy womb, Jesus.
Holy Mary, Mother of God,
Pray for us sinners,
Now and at the hour of our death. Amen.

Our Father,
who art in heaven,
hallowed be thy name;
thy kingdom come;
thy will be done on earth as it is in heaven.
Give us this day our daily bread;
and forgive us our trespasses
as we forgive those who trespass against us;
and lead us not into temptation,
but deliver us from evil. Amen.

 

[Tis_Bearself]

The Devil tries to weasel his way in on all of us, and the more so when we are trying to do the “right” things so he redoubles his efforts.

You didn’t “doom yourself” with your foolish thought. The Devil would be trying to do this stuff to you anyway. He comes after me and I guarantee you I’ve never offered my soul to the Devil. Just pray and don’t worry about it.

I’m saying a Hail Mary and a Prayer to St. Michael for you. Mary and Michael are good ones to invoke when you feel like you’re fighting off the devil. Also St. Benedict. And don’t forget St. Joseph.

 

[Joe_73]

Thanks for sharing, that sounds rough.

Perhaps when you are plagued by innapropriate thoughts, offer it up to god as sort of a prayer, asking God for help in your weakness to place him first. This takes the focus off sin and toward God.

I would develop a strong faith based and logical argument against “I doomed myself”, so whenever it enters your mind, you can kick it out.

Are homosexual struggles still an issue? I’ve struggled with being gay. It is important that we don’t reject ourselves for having them, but at the same time, they are a disordered desire. homosexual desires also tend to be a symptom of other emotional problems, and I would definately consider therapy, or self therapy. The most prominent type recognized is by Joseph Nicolosi, a catholic, who just passed away this year. It’s very insightful, but its pretty heavy, informationally and emotionally, to take in at first. Anyway I bought his latest book, and used that. The homosexual desires are not totally eradicated for me, but they don’t intrude very often, and when they do, I can examine them to the point where they snap, because I recognize the emotional pain they are trying to fix, and I know they will only make it worse. Anyway If you want to know more I will gladly share.

 

[tawny]

Praying for your intentions.