Afraid of being asked not to teach CCD anymore

[quiet52]

The OP should be commended for trying to resolve her irregular marriage, and for her yearning to catechise. However, she and all of us need to remember that we do NOT have an inherent RIGHT to serve in any visible ministry.

When we catechists participate in the Church’s mission to evangelize in this very special way, we are given a tremendous privilege and responsibility in passing on the faith. We do NOT merely pass on what we know. Who we are, and how we live, cannot be separated from what we do with our students. Catechists are commissioned – sent – by the parish community to be models of the faith even prior to teaching it. OP, what do you plan to say when one of your students ask you “Mrs. so-and-so, why don’t you ever receive Holy Communion when you go to Mass?” Are you really going to say “It’s none of your business”? Do you not believe it’s important for your students to learn by the WITNESS of their religious education teacher? We give testimony of our lives, not just information, to our students. No matter how well-intentioned the OP may be, she does not currently met that expectation.

OP’s religious education director should not have allowed her to teach. She did, after all, choose to marry someone she was not free, as a Catholic, to marry – there are consequences.
I realize that OP will most likely grieve if she stops teaching, because it IS a joy. I encourage her to use this experience to surrender in humililty to the will of our Lord and His Church, and to serve in some other capacity.

I suggest that the OP read through the General Directory for Catechesis. It discusses at great length many expectations. I will paste a small section below.

vatican.va/roman_curia/congregations/cclergy/documents/rc_con_ccatheduc_doc_17041998_directory-for-catechesis_en.html

The role of the catechist

1. No methodology, no matter how well tested, can dispense with the person of the catechist in every phase of the catechetical process. The charism given to him by the Spirit, a solid spirituality and transparent witness of life, constitutes the soul of every method. Only his own human and Christian qualities guarantee a good use of texts and other work instruments.

The catechist is essentially a mediator. He facilitates communication between the people and the mystery of God, between subjects amongst themselves, as well as with the community. For this reason, his cultural vision, social condition and lifestyle must not be obstacles to the journey of faith. Rather, these help to create the most advantageous conditions for seeking out, welcoming and deepening the Christian message. He does not forget that belief is a fruit of grace and liberty. Thus, he ensures that his activities always draw support from faith in the Holy Spirit and from prayer. Finally, the personal relationship of the catechist with the subject is of crucial importance.

 

[puzzleannie]

If the child asks you miss, why didn’t you go to communion, or even, why don’t my parents go to communion, you say

because I can’t right now and I will receive as soon as I can, and remember, it is really none of our business to ask why another person is not receiving communion, because that is between her and Jesus, and that is private.

 

[HouseArrest]

Here’s a question for the OP - if you thought that a student (current or ex) could possibly “do as you did and not as you say” as a result of your teaching CCD, would you want to teach before you straightened this out?

 

[mercygate]

Here’s a question for the OP - if you thought that a student (current or ex) could possibly “do as you did and not as you say” as a result of your teaching CCD, would you want to teach before you straightened this out?

Don’tcha think the OP is already well on her way to working through this?

She isn’t some obstreperous and willful brat; she is wading through some heavy water, and conscientiously (not to say bravely) facing the disappointments and obstacles that have appeared in her path.

To my mind, she is a model of penitence and grace. May God speed her quickly on her way to full Communion.

 

[duskyjewel]

The OP should be commended for trying to resolve her irregular marriage, and for her yearning to catechise. However, she and all of us need to remember that we do NOT have an inherent RIGHT to serve in any visible ministry.

When we catechists participate in the Church’s mission to evangelize in this very special way, we are given a tremendous privilege and responsibility in passing on the faith. We do NOT merely pass on what we know. Who we are, and how we live, cannot be separated from what we do with our students. Catechists are commissioned – sent – by the parish community to be models of the faith even prior to teaching it. … We give testimony of our lives, not just information, to our students. No matter how well-intentioned the OP may be, she does not currently met that expectation.

OP’s religious education director should not have allowed her to teach. She did, after all, choose to marry someone she was not free, as a Catholic, to marry – there are consequences.
I realize that OP will most likely grieve if she stops teaching, because it IS a joy. I encourage her to use this experience to surrender in humililty to the will of our Lord and His Church, and to serve in some other capacity.

This is excellent. This was my point when I suggested waiting a year while getting it all straightened out, then returning to teaching.

puzzleannie, I think you’re overreacting a little. No one called the OP a “floozy.” But she is living as a married person with someone the Church does not recognize her being married to. That could cause scandal. Look at the terrible attitude of people toward the teachings of the Church on marriage. Being able to point at a catechist and say, “Well, she didn’t follow the rules, and she’s teaching the Faith! So why should I have to…” would cause untold damage to the soul who uses that to justify their own behavior. It would also damage the Church when the seeming hypocrisy became public, as it eventually might.

Another poster got it right when she said it is our business, because it is our children being taught. No one forces anyone else to become the public face of the Church. But once you choose to do that, you risk this kind of problem if you are not living what the Church teaches.

I applaud the OP for wanting to make everything right and to live in a marriage recognized and blessed by the Church. She clearly has a repentant spirit and wants to be obedient to the Lord. But repentance and confession, while removing the spiritual consequences of our actions, do not remove the temporal consequences. She’s going to have to live through those…

 

[puzzleannie]

if the other parents and catechists were not standing around gossiping, there would be no scandal

 

[duskyjewel]

Who says anyone is gossiping? No one but the priest should know at this point anyway, unless there is someone in the parish who knows the OP’s husband long enough to know about his marital history.

If she doesn’t talk about it, none of the parents or catechists would know. If she does, then she brought it up. Gossip is wrong, but known information does have to be dealt with by the parish.

The OP came here and discussed the issue. We all responded. None of us were unkind or uncharitable that I saw. While some may not like our responses, those of us who think she shouldn’t teach for now said that in calm, nonconfrontational ways.

No one tracked down the OP to chastise her about her marital status. She brought it here for comment. She must have known she would get some responses along the lines of preferring her not to teach, at least for now. I don’t see how anyone did anything wrong.

 

[JReducation]

I am still a little unclear about annulments and the Church and how it all works. Can someone answer a hypothetical question to help my understanding?

A declaration of nullity is a statement by the Church or the state that the marriage was never valid, because all of the conditions that are required for validy were not met. If a person’s marriage is invalid, then they have never been married. This is different from a divorce. A divorce is a civil declaration that states that the marriage contract has been terminated. It acknowleges that there was a marriage contract and then terminates it. The faith of the Church tells us that marriage is not a contract, but a covenant between a man and a woman. This covenant binds them to each other for life, as Christ and the Church are bound. Therefore, you cannot terminate the covenant any more than you can terminate the relationship between Christ and the Church.

However, if you can demonstrate that the covenant never happened, because one or both of the parties involved lacked something that was essential for the covenant, then there is no marriage to dissolve and as far as the Church is concerned, a divorce is only a legal requirement to settle matters concerning property and custody if there are children.

If one in a situation like the OP’s went to Confession and were to abstain from sexual relations, would he or she then be considered in good standing then with the Church, able to receive Communion, etc? If the answer to this is “yes”, then does it “cause scandal” to live with someone one is not actually married to? Would one be allowed to live in the same house while the details (annulments of prior marriages, getting the current marriage blessed) are being worked out?

If a couple agreed to live as housemates went to confession, then there is no problem with the Church. The Church doesn’t care whom you live with as long as you don’t live as husband and wife.

There have been couples who have lived this way and have achieved sanctity, but this is not common. Joseph and Mary lived as housemates. From a Catholic perspective, they were never married, becaue the marriage was never consumated. However, since Joseph and Mary were Jews, the Catholic theology of marriage does not apply to them. The Jewish laws regarding marriage would apply and the Church would recognize the marriage under those laws.

There have even been couples who have separated to join religious orders and the Church accepts this. Again, this is rare.

This was one of the options that was given to gay people. You can live with a housemate whom you love and have a companionable relationship, without the sexual involvement. Some people need to have a significant other in their lives, but do not need the sexual component. But this is not as easy to do as it sounds.

However, if the couple, gay or straight, can do this, the Church has no problems. There is nothing immoral about this.

It takes very special people to live this way.

JR

 

[quiet52]

These are the standards expected for catechists, as laid out by my diocese. I suspect most of not all dioceses have similar standards.

A catechist is a fully initiated practicing Catholic

• who is a stable, mature individual
• who participates fully in the sacramental life of the church
• who has a personal prayer life
• who is comfortable sharing about his/her faith experiences
• who communicates well with children and adults
• who is committed to further study of the faith
• who is working towards or has completed the Diocesan
  Credential Program
• who is willing to develop their teaching skills through parish in-
  service
• whose life gives witness to a daily conversion to Christ

 

[HouseArrest]

Don’tcha think the OP is already well on her way to working through this?

She isn’t some obstreperous and willful brat; she is wading through some heavy water, and conscientiously (not to say bravely) facing the disappointments and obstacles that have appeared in her path.

To my mind, she is a model of penitence and grace. May God speed her quickly on her way to full Communion.

Well I don’t know. The original question was whether or not the pastor was going to “let her” continue teaching CCD. And then many posts went back and forth trying to determine what the “rules” say. I am asking her to look at it from a different angle. Forget the rules for a minute. If she thinks her situation might possibly cause a problem with a student somewhere down the road, would she want to take the time off to avoid that, even if she can get the ok to continue to teach?

I agree she seems sincere about teaching these kids. Someone who was looking out for only herself would never consider the above. A brat might, though.

 

[ethelzguy]

Well I don’t know. The original question was whether or not the pastor was going to “let her” continue teaching CCD. And then many posts went back and forth trying to determine what the “rules” say. I am asking her to look at it from a different angle. Forget the rules for a minute. If she thinks her situation might possibly cause a problem with a student somewhere down the road, would she want to take the time off to avoid that, even if she can get the ok to continue to teach?

I agree she seems sincere about teaching these kids. Someone who was looking out for only herself would never consider the above. A brat might, though.

While we wear each other out, the bottom line remains, it’s up to her pastor and DRE. Period.

 

[anamchara]

While we wear each other out, the bottom line remains, it’s up to her pastor and DRE. Period.

Do you suppose we will ever find out? I hope she gets to continue teaching. It was be ashame to lose a good teacher.