Age in a relationship

[Don9of11]

Are there any church rules or regulations regarding the age of individuals in a relationship? For example my brothers wife is 12 years older than he is, what if the age difference between two people was greater, say 15, 20 or 30 years?

 

[sanctamaria17]

The only time age is an issue in the Catholic Church is if you’re violating the laws of sexual consent.

Otherwise, who cares?

 

[dachsiemom2]

None that I am aware of.

 

[Joe_5859]

You must follow the sacred “half plus seven” rule of dating. You cannot date anyone who is younger than half your age plus seven years. Thus, if you are 30 years old, you can date people that are 22 years old and older (30/2+7=22). There is no upper age limit provided that you are not violating the aforementioned rule for the person you are dating.

Okay, not really.

The Church does not regulate dating based on age. There are a few canons in Church Law that deal with minimum ages for marriage, but that’s it.

Can. 1083 §1. A man before he has completed his sixteenth year of age and a woman before she has completed her fourteenth year of age cannot enter into a valid marriage.

§2. The conference of bishops is free to establish a higher age for the licit celebration of marriage.

and

Can. 1071 §1. Except in a case of necessity, a person is not to assist without the permission of the local ordinary at:

…6/ a marriage of a minor child when the parents are unaware or reasonably opposed;…

Can. 1072 Pastors of souls are to take care to dissuade youth from the celebration of marriage before the age at which a person usually enters marriage according to the accepted practices of the region.

So, as long as the two people involved are adults (not minors) and are free to marry, then there is no prohibition from them dating or getting married, regardless of the age gap.

 

[Magickman]

At age 18, a difference of 2 or 3 years may seem significant, even insurmountable.

By the time you are 30, those 2 or 3 years would be insignificant.

Now that I am 60, a 10 year age difference would not matter at all.

 

[BadTurkey]

You must follow the sacred “half plus seven” rule of dating.

This.

 

[Sarah_Angel]

The thing that people have against big age differences is more cultural than Catholic.

Not entirely sure why that is. Could be a combination of things.

I think the main reason people have a stigma against huge age gaps because young people (ie 18 or so) might be dating someone way older, which can be a potential danger zone…

But depending on the age gap, it completely depends on the people.

 

[takers]

You must follow the sacred “half plus seven” rule of dating. You cannot date anyone who is younger than half your age plus seven years.

My girlfriend in college had the rule that the guys she dated had to be closer to her age than her father’s. It seemed to work for her!

 

[beckers]

My girlfriend in college had the rule that the guys she dated had to be closer to her age than her father’s. It seemed to work for her!

That was my same rule. That means he could be no more than 14 years older then me. Luckly the one i found is only 10 yrs and 4 months older.

 

[Rascalking]

There is no church law saying anything against it. However-

I’d like to say it doesn’t matter, but to me it would. I’m very active-I like to run, hike, play with my dogs, and No, I’m not saying that someone significantly older than me couldn’t do that stuff-not at all. But I’m 30, if I date a 50 year old woman, it may be a detriment. What if I’m still running and playing outside and she simply doesn’t have the stamina?

Again, I’ve seen people in their late 60’s early 70’s humble me in physical outings-but I’m just not sure it’s the rule.

I mean no offense whatsoever to anyone older than me-like I said-often times it’s not the age, but the person, but in ten years down the road, when I’m 40, and then 70, and so on, it may be a problem. Yes, it can work, but I’m doubtful if they are the exception. And yes, it “works” in reverse too-a 30 year woman may not want a 50 year old man. There are some issues there that need to be addressed.

I tend to date women near my age. I’ve had a 5 year age difference, and that worked relationship ended for reasons based on life experience, not age.

To repeat myself, because I don’t want to be misunderstood-I mean NO offense to anyone who is older, in relationship where there is a huge age difference, or the like. It’s more the rule, not the exception.

 

[Irish_Girl_68]

My husband and I are 14 1/2 years apart. People thought it was weird when we started dating, but marrying him was the smartest thing I’ve ever done. That said, we were both older when we got married. But, it’s all timing and maturity. There’s no way it would have worked when I was 20.