All Funerals are sad, but even more so this one

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Last night, I attended the memorial mass for a grandma who was never close to the church,however her daughter sang in our choir for years. The twenty or so people who attended the liturgy never participated in the mass at all…did not stand, or kneel or pray at all (even with the deacon’s prompting) even though at least half of them were baptized Catholics. I believe that the work of the church is overwhelming in catechizing those who have wandered from the fold, and it is just so sad to me, that even at the time of death, people just don’t seem to be concerned any longer.😦
 
How sad. Why can’t people at least have enough respect to stand when prompted by the deacon? That’s just so offensive. Would it have killed them? 😦
 
My brother died in June, and since he had attended the SSPX chapel for the last seven years of his life, we held his funeral there. All of our family was very obedient to the SSPX dress code and rituals, even those who were Born Again Christians, Buddhists, Jews and Protestants. Every woman in our family wore a head covering and dressed modestly in black, and everyone knelt when it was called for, which is most of the time at an SSPX Mass. They did it out of respect for our brother though, rather than out of obedience to the priest or to God. Still, it was very nice to see such cooperation.
 
stbruno said:
Last night, I attended the memorial mass for a grandma who was never close to the church,however her daughter sang in our choir for years. The twenty or so people who attended the liturgy never participated in the mass at all…did not stand, or kneel or pray at all (even with the deacon’s prompting) even though at least half of them were baptized Catholics. I believe that the work of the church is overwhelming in catechizing those who have wandered from the fold, and it is just so sad to me, that even at the time of death, people just don’t seem to be concerned any longer.😦
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I’ve noticed this sort of thing too. Funerals really bring up the religious divisions that are so common in families now.
 
<<I believe that the work of the church is overwhelming in catechizing those who have wandered from the fold,>>

How do you catechize people who aren’t there or won’t come?
 
FWIW,

Before deciding to convert, when I would attend mass with a friend, I wouldn’t kneel or participate in responsive readings that I wasn’t sure about. However, I would always stand when the congregation did so.

At the time I felt like kneeling was inappropriate and just an extension of medieval court life where subjects would kneel before the king. I felt was I endorsing the views of church if I participated in the responsive readings.

So at least some of what you observed may not be ill will. I don’t understand the not standing though.
 
My husband isn’t Catholic and he kneels and prays when we are in church. He doesn’t do the sign of the cross. I guess it is whatever people are comfortable with. But I guess you said a lot of these people at the funeral are cradle catholics. Hmm.

I have been to many Eastern Orthodox events ( weddings, baptisms, mass ) but never really did much of what they do in the church. I have no idea how to sign the cross the way they do. I don’t want to try it, it would make a fool out of me! ( not that it should matter ) also, I am not sure, as a Catholic, if it is even appropriate or not.

Likewise, the times I have been to pentecostal churches ( I have gone a few times with friends ) I don’t like to wave my hands in the air and show everyone how faithful I am. Comfort zone…
 
stbruno said:
Last night, I attended the memorial mass for a grandma who was never close to the church,however her daughter sang in our choir for years. The twenty or so people who attended the liturgy never participated in the mass at all…did not stand, or kneel or pray at all (even with the deacon’s prompting) even though at least half of them were baptized Catholics. I believe that the work of the church is overwhelming in catechizing those who have wandered from the fold, and it is just so sad to me, that even at the time of death, people just don’t seem to be concerned any longer.😦
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i know what you mean. it is terribly sad. i went to my cousin’s wedding a couple years ago. my uncle and his wife sat in front of us, and they just kind of sat there like they were watching TV, and he’s my godfather!
 
Sina said:
I have been to many Eastern Orthodox events ( weddings, baptisms, mass ) but never really did much of what they do in the church. I have no idea how to sign the cross the way they do. I don’t want to try it, it would make a fool out of me! ( not that it should matter ) also, I am not sure, as a Catholic, if it is even appropriate or not.
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THe sign of the cross as used by the Orthodox is also used by many of the Eastern Catholic Churches (in Union with Rome). It is appropriate.

The prostrations, the deep bow upon entry, the kissing of Icons, lighting candles before the iconostas, the fellowship bread: also used in the Eastern Catholic Churches. Again, appropriate.

Communion, while in the same manner as the Eastern Catholic Churches, is not generally permitted to Catholics by the Eastern Orthodox nor the Oriental Orthodox; the exceptions are few, regional or local, and not usually general acceptance. So communing is not usually appropriate, but the manner and understanding is shared by the Eastern Catholic Churches. If knowingly invited by the celebrant, it is allowable under Roman Canon Law, assuming you are prepared appropriately.

I have had this happen in an Oriental Orthodox church; I asked to receive confession (could not get to a Catholic church, but the Orthodox parish was walking distance from my cousin’s Baptist church), as, after a week with my grandmother, I was in dire need of it, and was asked if I was orthodox. I explained my being a practicing Ruthenian Catholic, and the pastor asked after Rev. Fr. Steve by name (full name), and a couple of the parishioners… and then was invited to participate in the DL and to receive communion.
 
Yes, you are right. Sorrow is made that much deeper when people are apathetic about it.
 
When my aunt died, I was the only one singing because of the other people were lapsed. Finally, the organist figured out who was singing and just gave me the eye as to when to start.

It made me sad to realize so many members of my family may be going to hell.
 
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