All I want is a true friend

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Thru my life experiences…I have learned that a True Friend will always be there for you regardless the situation…there are those that I would consider “fly by night” individuals that come and go in your life…an example…this lady, Betty, I had met in a Church Support Group was a potential person I thought was a friend. She would come over to my house and we would share a glass of wine and then go out to dinner every Friday after work. I, one day invited my neighbor to join us. He was alone as well as we. We made it a routine of meeting at my house for wine and later dinner. Then we got busy and went our separate ways…later, Betty, called me and stated that she and my neighbor were dating…I was skeptical about the situation and asked Betty what her intentions were because she recently lost her husband… and informed her not to take advantage of him…she was not a friend but the type of person that used people. Lesson learned… 😉
 
Maybe it’s me, I concede that. For the last 40 yrs I have become more & more serious about the Catholic faith and know the Holy Spirit works in me, in all of us. God cannot be constrained to work thru whomever He wants and perhaps these disappointments are meant for me to grow not only in faith, but personally. Being accused of that which I know is not factual is quite a blow. I’ve also become more estranged with our youngest son; he has embraced many values with which he did not grow up with. He has said some very hateful things in an email which I doubt he would say to my face. I am not looking forward to seeing him at upcoming holiday times, though he may choose not to come home (he doesn’t live far away, but in another city).

Let us pray for each other, and that our Good Lord knows what is best for us, and that we will be able to persevere in faith and that he’ll grant us the grace to be kind and generous in the face of difficulties. Mother Mary, please pray for us! St Joseph, terror of demons, pray for us!
 
libbeylu said:
I was skeptical about the situation and asked Betty what her intentions were because she recently lost her husband… and informed her not to take advantage of him…she was not a friend but the type of person that used people. Lesson learned
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I don’t understand this statement. What business of it is yours to ask another adult what their ‘intentions’ are toward another adult?

so all along you knew she ‘used’ people but you continued to spend time with her?

I’m very confused on what your issue is.
 
Toi_nhan_31 said:
Deep inside I badly feel the need for true friendship, need to have people with whom you can share everything, people to whom you can listen and get listened.
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Sounds more like needing a therapist than a friend.

We should not burden others with our problems unless the other person has the ability to actually do something about it.

I have a close and dear friend. We were acquaintances for 5 years. Then she moved to town. We best friends now. But we have a common interest. She’s not Catholic but respects Catholics.

We don’t talk about deep personal things. The truth is, my deepest connection is with my brothers and sisters.
 
Pattylt said:
I’m an agnostic and if my closest friends had to be agnostic as well, I wouldn’t have any. We view religion very differently but I understand not only what their beliefs are, also how important those beliefs are to them. So, we have boundaries. We don’t discuss religion except on rare occasions where we agree to disagree ahead of time.
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My best friend is agnostic. We just avoid the topic as you say. We occasionally trade jests just because. Further, he is a screaming liberal, I am a bit conservative. How are we possible? We have been great friends since 1980.
 
No one needs to put up with bullying. It is for you to decide if it is good natured joking or if it is bullying.
 
It was apparent that she used people because she would always come over and drink my wine and never would bring any…I just let it go…but I asked her intentions, knowing that she was a “user”…I guess I wanted to protect him cause he was a caring person and I did not want to see him hurt…which she did with no reservations! I stopped inviting her over but she would “appear” often…she needed someone…I was there…until she met someone and got married again…ugh!
 
libbeylu said:
she would always come over and drink my wine and never would bring any
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I knew someone like that. So yes, there are real users out there. Sorry about your friend getting hurt.

My best friend dropped by last night and brought me a package of toilet paper! now that’s a real friend!
 
It’s true there are people who are intentionally selfish in their relationship with others, thinking always about themselves, always expecting to be treated special.
For me, meet more often the other type of person, those who always think to be better than others and give themselves the right to judge and laugh at people’s mistakes, mistakes, of which they themselves are champions.
 
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