All Souls vestments

[Jestersage]

Black, as mine is TLM, and thus is a variant of a Mass for the Dead. In fact a bier with the names of those in memory (and 6 candles around it) was in front of the rails.

 

[Xanthippe_Voorhees]

At this point, I’m hardly notice it anymore when I see pallbearers wearing jeans, t-shirt, sneakers (or worse). I want to say to them “you mean to tell me that you have so little respect for your dead uncle that you wear an old t-shirt advertising a brand of beer to bear his coffin?” I’m serious too. The lack of respectable (not just respectful but respectable) clothing at funerals is appalling (no pun intended) to me today.

Seriously there is so little respect today for simple propriety. I’m not exaggerating about the pall bearers either. It seems that every funeral I have, there is at least 2 or 3 or more who dress like they would to mow the lawn.

Honestly, though, when 3 of my 4 great grandparents passed they made it clear that we were NOT to wear black. This angered my grandmother who forced us to wear black because “propriety”. My great-grandfather was furious she did that. He said that if she did that at his funeral he’d haunt and torture her for the rest of her days.

She took it seriously.

Quite honestly most of the people that I know that are at the end of life have asked for colorful clothes or simple clothes.

Now, everyone still “dresses up” but I think I was a small child the last time anyone even hinted at black clothes for a funeral.

 

[Phemie]

I’ve seen pallbearers in suits but I’ve also seen them in hockey jerseys, and no, they weren’t in a hockey league, they simply did it to honour the deceased. In fact, a good many of the mourners at that particular funeral were wearing identical jerseys.

But most of the time I see people in casual clothes.

 

[Xanthippe_Voorhees]

I’ve seen pallbearers in suits but I’ve also seen them in hockey jerseys, and no, they weren’t in a hockey league, they simply did it to honour the deceased. In fact, a good many of the mourners at that particular funeral were wearing identical jerseys.

But most of the time I see people in casual clothes.

And I think this still is often on the command of the deceased. The “don’t wear black/a suit/etc…” is a really common thing these days. Sometimes a specific style or color is even commanded. My great-grandfather asked for red because that was the color of his first car.

 

[FrDavid96]

I’ve seen pallbearers in suits but I’ve also seen them in hockey jerseys, and no, they weren’t in a hockey league, they simply did it to honour the deceased. In fact, a good many of the mourners at that particular funeral were wearing identical jerseys.

But most of the time I see people in casual clothes.

Uniforms? I don’t have an issue with them, not generally.

Something that honors the deceased? I can accept that. But not to the point where it goes against the dignity of the funeral. I’ve seen all sorts when it comes to this category.

Casual? how casual? All right, admit that not every man keeps a fine 3-piece suit handy at a moment’s notice like in the past, or a woman who always has a funeral dress ready in the closet (either of which might have been worn to non-funerals, as well). To some people, anything without a screen-print logo advertising either some product or some joke is now considered “dressing up.”

I still see it as a loss of propriety in our modern society. I think we’ve gone too far indeed.

 

[lilypadrees]

When my maternal grandmother passed away on 9-11-01, she’d had her funeral already planned to the letter. We were instructed not to wear black. Mama and I wore green dresses and were told we matched like twins. I prefer to wear black. But because I adored my maternal grandmother, I respected her wishes and prayed that God would forgive me for wearing such a festive color.

 

[Xanthippe_Voorhees]

When my maternal grandmother passed away on 9-11-01, she’d had her funeral already planned to the letter. We were instructed not to wear black. Mama and I wore green dresses and were told we matched like twins. I prefer to wear black. But because I adored my maternal grandmother, I respected her wishes and prayed that God would forgive me for wearing such a festive color.

Wearing color to a funeral is not wrong. Black is a cultural development. We are required to have a respectful disposition.

Even sackcloth and ashes perscribed by the Bible were not black as we know it today…but probably a rather dingy grey.