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TrixieMcGee
Guest
Why would you do the same thing then? One thread on the subject should be sufficient. Can’t be annoyed with something too much if you then turn around and do it yourself.
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Marybeloved
Guest
With due respect the two threads are related but not identical. The other one is about the choice to quit dating entirely, this one is about why people fear being alone. But why does it bother you? I don’t get the problem.
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TrixieMcGee
Guest
Those aren’t the only two. She has done some other ones relatively recently as well. It is just redundant, one is plenty. There is a problem when people like in the other thread start saying things like marriage just isn’t worth the work or risk and stuff like that. That is a little annoying to me. Plus now she says that it is annoying for her to see multiple things on the same subject, but she has now done the same thing which is hypocritical. That annoys me.
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Luvz2travel
Guest
If you follow me that closely you must be a fan
I guess I’m not allowed an opinion on anything though…
In any case I was only expressing a thought to try to reflect away from all the negativity on the forum where so many post about being alone. I’m not trying to convert anyone either I’m just saying I feel it’s ok to be alone there’s nothing to be ashamed of. I find it interesting that this seems to upset or annoy some people if it does annoy you don’t read it. I skip over all the forums that don’t interest me. By the way the no dating thread had nothing to do with this one. That was about a choice not to date and why that should bother people is baffling to me but whatever.
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Trishie
Guest
I guess it’s an emotional subject!
There is nothing wrong about accepting single life without resentment if that is your path. You made a good point, in pointing out that fact, Luvz2travel.
There would be fewer miserable marriages if some were not so desperate for a partner that they couldn’t bear to be alone and therefore rush into marriage ignoring any red flags simply for the sake of being married.
Many believe that happiness is dependent on others, when happiness actually begins within.
There is nothing wrong about accepting single life without resentment if that is your path. You made a good point, in pointing out that fact, Luvz2travel.
There would be fewer miserable marriages if some were not so desperate for a partner that they couldn’t bear to be alone and therefore rush into marriage ignoring any red flags simply for the sake of being married.
Many believe that happiness is dependent on others, when happiness actually begins within.
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bck4g36as
Guest
About time some people started figuring that out.
And you worded it correctly, albeit not in the headline.
It’s called ‘being by yourself’; being alone would be…being alone, being a special exception, the only one existing, i.e. another way to write Hell.
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bck4g36as
Guest
I think who you just described is about every single woman in existence (and as a result, have described entirely who the men are that marry them) with the exception being so statistically insignificant (but not insignificant otherwise) that it is microscopic.
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thewanderer
Guest
I would just like to point out that this is a ridiculous overgeneralization that is extremely insulting to men.
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bck4g36as
Guest
I am a man. And overgeneralisation? You don’t live under a rock; you live under a mountain.
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thewanderer
Guest
And I am a woman.
Unless you have actual statistics to back your statement up all you have to go off of are the people you personally have known, just as that is all I have to go off of. How then shall we decide which of us is more correct when it applies to ‘women (or men) in general’? The fact of the matter is that we cannot, which is why, at least for now what you are saying must be considered an overgeneralization. There are people who agree with you based on their experiences and people who disagree with you based on theirs. Without an actual study to find out the numbers there can be no definitive judgement, and so it remains an overgeneralization drawn from your particular experience of the women and men you have known.
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Trishie
Guest
I don’t see quite how that works as I was referring to either men or women, not simply women who marry or remain in relationships because the believe their happiness depends on the other. Even in this forum, we encounter many who do describe conditions prior to marriage or within relationships that indicate that the desire to marry/hang on the the pre-marriage relationship does overwhelm their judgement.
However I do have more faith in humanity than you, and believe that many mature-spirited people go into marriage. I know some of them !
A gentle caution that in this forum we don’t last long if we make personal unkind remarks to or about others, eg., telling someone they 'live under a mountain". It’s certainly no compliment, in fact can be received as an insult. You could have responded in a less personal manner. It is enough to say that you 'strongly disagree".
However I do have more faith in humanity than you, and believe that many mature-spirited people go into marriage. I know some of them !
A gentle caution that in this forum we don’t last long if we make personal unkind remarks to or about others, eg., telling someone they 'live under a mountain". It’s certainly no compliment, in fact can be received as an insult. You could have responded in a less personal manner. It is enough to say that you 'strongly disagree".
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Marybeloved
Guest
And I am a woman.
Always thought you were a guy! 
You have a cool, calm, logical vibe even in disagreements that comes off like a guy (to me at least)- like many guys I know-lest I be attacked for suggesting that women are emotional and irrational (I’m not!)
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thewanderer
Guest
haha, you’re not the first one to think I am a guy on here.
I was debating someone on a thread once and someone else came in saying that maybe we needed a little more feminine influence in the discussion. I found it rather amusing to be honest. 
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Andre1000
Guest
Sorry but whenever I see such a topic I have to post this:
The council of trent defined a dogma:
Session XXIV
Canon 10
If anyone says that the married state excels the state of virginity or celibacy, and that it is better and happier to be united in matrimony than to remain in virginity or celibacy, let him be anathema.
The council of trent defined a dogma:
Session XXIV
Canon 10
If anyone says that the married state excels the state of virginity or celibacy, and that it is better and happier to be united in matrimony than to remain in virginity or celibacy, let him be anathema.
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Rose71
Guest
I can’t see anything wrong with living alone. I’ve shared a house as a student and with co-workers in my early 20s; but I’ve never been married or co-habited with a partner.
For me, there were some terribly bleak times and some really wonderful times and I truly believe the whole experience was part of God’s plan for me.
‘Alone’ definitely isn’t a bad word, but ‘lonely’ certainly is! Anyone can be lonely, whether they are married, co-habiting or living in a religious community, as well as being single and living alone.
I agree that the attitude of some people towards those who live alone can appear absolutely amazing considering we are in the 21st Century! I feel in today’s society, it’s sometimes considered more acceptable to confess to a fondness for dressing up a nanny goat, calling her ‘Cedric’, claiming she has caprian transgender tendencies and marrying her in a civil partnership than living alone.
Now I’m looking forward to marriage, I still appreciate my time alone in my house that I’ve paid for and worked for. Sharing my living space will be a huge adjustment and a challenge. There is no ‘one lifestyle fits all’ in this life. Just look at the saints!
Some lived quiet lives of contemplation; some travelled miles; some were political activists; some chose to fight for the rights of the sick and marginalised…some were married and others (gasp!) weren’t.
For me, there were some terribly bleak times and some really wonderful times and I truly believe the whole experience was part of God’s plan for me.
‘Alone’ definitely isn’t a bad word, but ‘lonely’ certainly is! Anyone can be lonely, whether they are married, co-habiting or living in a religious community, as well as being single and living alone.
I agree that the attitude of some people towards those who live alone can appear absolutely amazing considering we are in the 21st Century! I feel in today’s society, it’s sometimes considered more acceptable to confess to a fondness for dressing up a nanny goat, calling her ‘Cedric’, claiming she has caprian transgender tendencies and marrying her in a civil partnership
than living alone.Now I’m looking forward to marriage, I still appreciate my time alone in my house that I’ve paid for and worked for. Sharing my living space will be a huge adjustment and a challenge. There is no ‘one lifestyle fits all’ in this life. Just look at the saints!
Some lived quiet lives of contemplation; some travelled miles; some were political activists; some chose to fight for the rights of the sick and marginalised…some were married and others (gasp!) weren’t.
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bck4g36as
Guest
Could you fetch me my cradle? I’d do it myself, but I was born yesterday after all.And I am a woman.
Unless you have actual statistics to back your statement up all you have to go off of are the people you personally have known, just as that is all I have to go off of. How then shall we decide which of us is more correct when it applies to ‘women (or men) in general’? The fact of the matter is that we cannot, which is why, at least for now what you are saying must be considered an overgeneralization. There are people who agree with you based on their experiences and people who disagree with you based on theirs. Without an actual study to find out the numbers there can be no definitive judgement, and so it remains an overgeneralization drawn from your particular experience of the women and men you have known.
Also, please get yourself a flashlight; it’s mighty dark down there, and I think at that depth, you may also be lacking sufficient oxygen to the brain.
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thewanderer
Guest
Could you fetch me my cradle? I’d do it myself, but I was born yesterday after all.
Also, please get yourself a flashlight; it’s mighty dark down there, and I think at that depth, you may also be lacking sufficient oxygen to the brain.
Wow, all I can say is that you are lucky I haven’t yet reported you for your ridiculous ad hominems. If you wish to have a real discussion then I am more than willing to engage in one with you, but continued personal insults without any point behind them really just are not acceptable.
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