So boys, like my son, who had said they weren’t discerning, they wore what the girls wore? Not what the other boys wore?
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I am curious what you source for knowledge of what exactly kids are thinking is.
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PaulinVA
Guest
You know, if you allow girls to be altar servers but then require them to wear different garb, that’s a passive-aggressive way of reminding girls that they* really* don’t belong among the altar servers.
People on all sides of the female altar server debate have good points about their appropriateness, but to make girls pawns in the debate is wrong. They are serving, at that time, as equals to the boys and should be treated as such.
People on all sides of the female altar server debate have good points about their appropriateness, but to make girls pawns in the debate is wrong. They are serving, at that time, as equals to the boys and should be treated as such.
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maryjk
Guest
You indicated that the girls were “simply helping,” while the boys “may be discerning a vocation.”
What about the boys, like my son, that aren’t discerning? He has stated to me many times that he has no interest in being a priest. Should he then dress as the girls on the altar? Since he is simply helping?
You talk to them. Ask them. They are really quite insightful and it beats assuming you know what they are thinking.
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Corki
Guest
I disagree. Girls and boys have different dress code requirements for lots of things that they do. It is passive aggressive to require girls to wear school uniform skirts while the boys wear pants? Does it send a message that girls don’t belong if only the girls are required to wear a veil to First Communion?
Whether you like or dislike female altar servers is no reason they have to dress in a unisex manner.
Or it is simply a way of readily differentiating the role each sex plays in the Mass.
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etmom
Guest
I have never seen it required that a girl wear a veil to first communion. Many don’t.
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etmom
Guest
Altar girls are serving in the same role as the altar boys.
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Corki
Guest
It is in our parish and in the parishes where all my neices and nephews have received First Communion. In my brother’s parish, the veils even have to be identical. But even if it isn’t required in your parish, do they let the boys wear nice white dresses and the girls wear suits? Probably not. There are different dress requirements for boys and girls.
Perhaps.
However, the role served can never be anything more. So why allow the groundwork to begin with?
Also, what exactly do you find wrong with seperating out how the girl is dressed as opposed to how the boy dresses?
In society, the dress code for male and female is different.
Why should the Mass be different in that respect?
Why should we dress the girls and boys in the same manner?
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maryjk
Guest
It isn’t that they should dress in the same manner. It is that you said they shouldn’t dress the same, not because they are boys and girls, but because girls are not discerning a vacation to the priesthood and boys are. With that reasoning, boys that have said they aren’t interested in the priesthood, should dress as the girls do.
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etmom
Guest
Actually, the expensive fancy white dress is not a requirement to receive the sacrament. I’m certain the sacrament would not be denied to those who could not afford either the suit or the dress or veil. The efficacy if the sacrament is not dependent on a specific style of clothing when receiving. Otherwise , would not those receiving for the first time at Easter Vigil also be required to do the same? Dressing respectfully and reverently would be appropriate.
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Baelor
Guest
There are very young altar servers, and hence they are relevant in our consideration.
It is a reasonable assumption that you were referring to vocation as vocation to the priesthood, especially given the statement that it is necessarily unfulfilled for girls and this is the direction in which the conversation has gone. If that is incorrect, of course my statement does not apply.
Why are different vestment necessary for boys and girls who are altar servers? I fail to see why I should accept the reasoning that because we can make them dress differently, we should.
That is not the point. Altar serving is not to be taken as a time for young men to discern the priesthood and nothing more. Therefore, this claim makes no sense.
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The_Idiot
Guest
In some parishes I know all children for First Communion wear parish supplied white albs so there is no competition in th fashion stakes - boys and girls alike also nothing on the girls’ heads . I full remember the comments after one ceremony when one little girl had a small coronet with , I kid you not , a whirling statue of Our Lady.
You are assuming the garb has to do with what is going on in their head.
It doesn’t.
It has to do with the role that can be fulfilled.
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Baelor
Guest
So you are arguing that boys and girls should be dressed differently because of a potentiality that may never be realized? Why do you feel this way?
In other words, why not just dress all of the servers in albs?
This is incorrect.
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etmom
Guest
The church permits it. You believe the church to be in error on this?
Please be specific. What exactly is it that the church has permitted?
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englishredrose
Guest
I serve and we all wear the same 
Why do I serve… well am certainly not thinking about priesthood but and whilst I can’t be certain I don’t think any of the team are.
Our priest is neither for or against female priests and when he asked us as a team if we wanted to be a part of the guild. I had said ‘we’ had to come out of the guild when first accepted female Servers ( I was one of the intial 3 back then - 1988).
He just said ‘there are some wierd people around’.
Why do I serve? Well this time around the priest looking after us in interregnum got me back into it. Other than that. I cannot honestly give a coherent answer and before you say I am anglican etc, many of the church hold strong Catholic views like you guys on it. I enjoy the choir as much if not more so. I do both. Like our priest I am neither for or against female priests. I could never make my mind up about ‘them’ and his way of wording it sounds a lot better than just sitting on the fence about it.
Why do I serve… well am certainly not thinking about priesthood but and whilst I can’t be certain I don’t think any of the team are.
Our priest is neither for or against female priests and when he asked us as a team if we wanted to be a part of the guild. I had said ‘we’ had to come out of the guild when first accepted female Servers ( I was one of the intial 3 back then - 1988).
He just said ‘there are some wierd people around’.
Why do I serve? Well this time around the priest looking after us in interregnum got me back into it. Other than that. I cannot honestly give a coherent answer and before you say I am anglican etc, many of the church hold strong Catholic views like you guys on it. I enjoy the choir as much if not more so. I do both. Like our priest I am neither for or against female priests. I could never make my mind up about ‘them’ and his way of wording it sounds a lot better than just sitting on the fence about it.
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