Alternative to retreats

  • Thread starter Thread starter Anglewannabe
  • Start date Start date
Status
Not open for further replies.
A

Anglewannabe

Guest
As much as I understand that a lot of people benefit from retreats, I honestly rarely have a good experience at them.

I want to do something to improve my spiritual life, but honestly don’t know what to do.

Are there any alternatives to retreats? Any getways or something else that are supported by the church?

Angie
 
Anglewannabe said:
As much as I understand that a lot of people benefit from retreats, I honestly rarely have a good experience at them.

I want to do something to improve my spiritual life, but honestly don’t know what to do.

Are there any alternatives to retreats? Any getways or something else that are supported by the church?

Angie
Click to expand...
Hi. Probably you should try to find out why, for example, that you did not have good experience at a retreat? What happened? What kind of retreat did you participate in?

You can narrow down the answer if you are more specific with the questions.

Different people have different ways in improving their personal spiritual life. More importantly, if you recognize your spiritual situation, then it is easier to build from the part that you are deficient in.

Generally I would say it is easier to grow spiritually if one is experiencing a child like hunger for God but then again, no two situations can be exactly the same.

May Good bless you in your journey.
 
Anglewannabe said:
As much as I understand that a lot of people benefit from retreats, I honestly rarely have a good experience at them.

I want to do something to improve my spiritual life, but honestly don’t know what to do.

Are there any alternatives to retreats? Any getways or something else that are supported by the church?

Angie
Click to expand...
Our local monastery has silent retreats; there is no group, no structure; you just spend a few days with the monks in study and silent prayer. My husband has gone a couple of times and got a lot out of it.
 
If you say why you didn’t like the retreats, it would be easier to make recommendations.
There are lots of kinds of retreats and if there was a certain aspect you didn’t like at one, you might like another. You could also try adoration, or getting involved in a ministry.
 
Here in the Denver area, there is a retreat house run by the Jesuits. It’s all silent and really beautiful. There’s a large room with super comfy chairs and sofas, and lots of end-table lamps (for those of us with poor eyesight :o), and a large fire place, and lots of natural light.

There’s a nice chapel with a few chairs that can be moved to suit a person’s need in prayer.

The rooms are cozy and comfy (and private).

The food is excellent.

The grounds offer beautiful walking paths with amazing views.

They offer one-on-one daily direction for those who desire it.

AND they work with people to pay what they can afford, if they can’t afford the regular fee. They worked with me and I appreciated it more than I can say. 👍

Benedictine monasteries will usually offer space for guests on private retreats.

Ask your pastor what he might recommend. And God bless you!! 😃
 
You usually get something out of something according to your expectations. Don’t go on retreats expecting rainbows and lollipops, great visions or new age enlightenment. It can happen, but don’t seek it. Think more of peace, restoration of body and soul, personal reflection and a deeper prayer life. You can even do a “private retreat” at home. Turn off the TV for a week-end, do spiritual reading, and prayers, let the world pass you by for a week-end and just drink in the peace and quite that will flood your soul. I think to disassociate from the world for a few days, every 3 months or so would be beneficial for most of us. Wishing you peace and you have my prayers.
 
Gertabelle said:
Here in the Denver area, there is a retreat house run by the Jesuits. It’s all silent and really beautiful. There’s a large room with super comfy chairs and sofas, and lots of end-table lamps (for those of us with poor eyesight :o), and a large fire place, and lots of natural light.

There’s a nice chapel with a few chairs that can be moved to suit a person’s need in prayer.

The rooms are cozy and comfy (and private).

The food is excellent.

The grounds offer beautiful walking paths with amazing views.

They offer one-on-one daily direction for those who desire it.

AND they work with people to pay what they can afford, if they can’t afford the regular fee. They worked with me and I appreciated it more than I can say. 👍

Benedictine monasteries will usually offer space for guests on private retreats.

Ask your pastor what he might recommend. And God bless you!! 😃
Click to expand...
We have the identical thing available here. Ignatius House. Guided AND silent retreat. I myself prefer the 7- day silent retreats with daily Spiritual direction.
Awesome.

But, as everyone said: what didn’t’ you like about the retreats? A good retreat is based on the premise of a mind and heart that is OPEN to new things, and the promptings of the Holy Spirit. Many times, we are so busy in our daily life, that the noise and clutter in our minds and hearts gets the better of us. This is why I like the silent retreat. For a day or so, the prince of lies keeps telling me I have better things to do, more pressing things to do, picking apart details…but once I can push that aside and focus on the quiet, and the reflective way…I benefit so much. Like a spa for the soul . 🙂
 
It is good that you are interested in a retreat, Angie. I found this site, and it may help you plan your own at home retreat. I plan on using the link to have an at home retreat in the near future. Hope it helps.

retreatday.com/
 
I like to go on pilgrimages. Sometimes to a shrine, sometimes to just a church in a new city…
 
Blessedwithfive said:
I like to go on pilgrimages. Sometimes to a shrine, sometimes to just a church in a new city…
Click to expand...
You can turn a vacation into a pilgrimage by seeking churches, old missions, abbeys and monasteries to visit.
Many places provide guesthouses which might replace hotel rooms, providing the opportunity to attend compline, or to spend time alone in a reading room or walking stations of the cross, or in front of the Blessed Sacrament.
In addition to supporting personal growth, overnighting at such a place, provides financial support to seminarians, monks, nuns, who pray for us and for the world.
 
Well, the first thing that drove me crazy about most retreats is they were silent. I live alone and more quiet time is NOT something I need/enjoy

And then there other retreats were most of the people barely attended church and told dirty jokes.

Then there was the retreat were the speaker told stories about people who came to him for help and he mocked those people.

Honestly, I just have no desire to try a retreat again

Angie
 
Anglewannabe said:
Well, the first thing that drove me crazy about most retreats is they were silent. I live alone and more quiet time is NOT something I need/enjoy

And then there other retreats were most of the people barely attended church and told dirty jokes.

Then there was the retreat were the speaker told stories about people who came to him for help and he mocked those people.

Honestly, I just have no desire to try a retreat again

Angie
Click to expand...
I’m not sure where you could get a spiritual experience that involves socialization, but only with people who will never offend you in any way. And don’t take this the wrong way, but your threshold for tolerance might be slightly lower than that of the average bear. Maybe a very small weekly prayer group with very select women? Or something task-based like the club that knits hats for preterm babies in NICU?
 
Anglewannabe said:
Well, the first thing that drove me crazy about most retreats is they were silent. I live alone and more quiet time is NOT something I need/enjoy

And then there other retreats were most of the people barely attended church and told dirty jokes.

Then there was the retreat were the speaker told stories about people who came to him for help and he mocked those people.

Honestly, I just have no desire to try a retreat again

Angie
Click to expand...
As others have said - there are many types of retreats - I went on a 5 day “Silent” retreat [Jesuit order] but communicated with an assigned Spiritual Director before the retreat and every day of the Retreat - it was a directed retreat - so even though we did not speak out loud except once daily with our spiritual director and in the confessional … we did listen to talks and were expected to focus our meditations on questions or topics in order to assist our personal spiritual growth - I enjoyed it … but that type of retreat is not for everyone.

I went on several Beginning Experience Grief Retreats and now volunteer with Beginning Experience to help others through the loss of a spouse through Separation, Divorce and Death. beginningexperience.org/php5/index.php … and beginningexperienceoforegon.org/ ] This is Catholic in origin ecumenical in outreach … so many people who come and even Team are not Catholic or even religious … these Retreats are work - grieving is hard on a person not easy - the retreats are well worth the time - but are focused on the grieving process …I highly recommend them to people who have lost a spouse - but I never tell them the weekend will be relaxing and fun … my only regret was delaying two years after one was recommended to me …

There are day long retreats and weekend retreats and week long retreats - focused on a specific topic/person/spiritual gift/theology/spirituality … you did not say what the length or focus of the Retreats you attended were? I have never attended a retreat that did not have a Topic - never heard of a retreat without a topic …and I generally attend those that relevant to my life - to where I am in my life and where I need that type of growth …

These are all Retreats I have recently seen advertised - Make this the best Advent Ever, The Last Seven Words of Christ and You, Men’s /Women;s Spirituality, Exploring the Spirituality of the Women who followed Christ, Stewardship and What it means to you, Growing in Prayer …

Of course - there are the ""self directed retreats’ one can engage in at nearly every monastery

I am sure you will find the Retreat that will bless your life … and if its not a retreat you need - perhaps its some other growth opportunity like a Bible Study or a gathering of people working on living the Beatitudes - feeding the hungry, clothing the naked, visiting the sick/home bound …
 
Anglewannabe said:
Well, the first thing that drove me crazy about most retreats is they were silent. I live alone and more quiet time is NOT something I need/enjoy

And then there other retreats were most of the people barely attended church and told dirty jokes.

Then there was the retreat were the speaker told stories about people who came to him for help and he mocked those people.

Honestly, I just have no desire to try a retreat again

Angie
Click to expand...
How true. What you related do happen and as a result you did not get what you wanted.

Sorry that you were unfortunate enough to meet such situations in the retreats that you attended.

The basic idea of a retreat is to find time or give time rather to be exclusively with God. In other word, out of your precious time, this one you want to spend exclusively for God. You are giving your time to God, an act of generosity from you.

The principle of generosity is that no matter how generous we are, we cannot outdo God. Thus when we give something to Him, in this case our time, He would give us back something in return.

I believe in that and I have been to countless retreats. And every time I would get something in return. In other word, retreats rejuvenate, reinvigorate and affirm me until such a time I would need another one because the influence of the real world which would wear out their gracious effect.

I think the first attitude towards going for a retreat is that one wants to spend time with God and therefore one would not allow that to be nullified by whatever happens at a retreat.

That is easier said than done, because we are often full of impurities and baggages that need to be done away with. It is not easy not to get distracted or irritated by things or people that we do not approve of.

Whatever it is, remember that when we seek God, He will honour it and respond to us.

As an alternative, I don’t know whether your parish has this or not, but if there is a seminar of some kind that is conducted away from home as a retreat, maybe it is a good starter, to learn some (name removed by moderator)ut to refresh our mind to be conducive to the things of God.
 
Pilgrimages are a great way to deepen your spiritual life. Check with your Diocese to see if any priests are offering any. They do tend to be expensive though.

Do you have a habit of daily prayer? That is one of the best ways to deepen your spiritual life.

Even if you are looking for more social activities like a Bible study, nothing will replace the benefits of daily prayer.
 
A couple of suggestions:

Best Lent Ever at www.DynamicCatholic.com. It includes a daily message, sometimes a video, and sometimes comments and discussion with other Catholics.

Another possibility is a Cursillo weekend. My weekend was fantastic. Others, though, have not had great experiences. Learn about this one before talking to your priest.

God Bless You.
 
Irishmom2: Thank you for sharing that link for retreat days. I believe it’ll be very helpful for me.
 
I attended a weekend retreat at a local parish. Trained leaders with Christ Renews His Parish (CHiRP). It was very well organized. I was invited by a friend who attends the parish. I have continued meeting with their weekly Bible study and it has just been excellent. They start and end on time, our time there is filled with scripture study, reflections on that scripture, spiritual songs, prayer. No chatty gossip. No clicks. My only wish is that this would be in all parishes 🙂
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Back
Top