Always depressed around Easter

[Cajun_Girl]

When I was in college, the Triduum was my favorite part of the year. The services we had were beautiful almost beyond description. Every Holy Thursday, we had a long, solemn Eucharistic procession after Mass, singing those beautiful Latin songs and ending with Adoration and Evening Prayer. On Good Friday, my friends and I would wear black in observance of the solemnity. We would spend the day fasting together and perhaps do a walking Stations of the Cross. During the service, we chanted the entire Gospel and placed flowers on the tomb of Jesus. The Holy Saturday Mass was four hours long–even my traditional home parish does a shorter version–and moved us from the darkness of Old Testament times to the light and celebration of Easter. After Mass, we had a “Resurrection Party,” where we would break our fasts and penances and eat all of the pizza and candy we could hold. We would go to bed at 3:00 AM and get up the next morning for Sunday Mass, not because it was necessary but because we wanted to experience it all. The following week, even the daily Masses were huge celebrations, filled with the joy of the resurrected Christ.

Now I’m living on the other side of the country. I love my church parish for being involved and family-friendly, but anyone will tell you that the music is atrocious. The first time I celebrated Holy Thursday there, I started crying because it was so ugly. I’ve started to drive over to my dad’s place a few hours away because at least his church has some reasonable services. But my old friends are scattered all over the country now, and all of the vibrant, fun, Catholic people who made my faith real will not be there. I love my Baptist husband, and we can share prayer, the Bible, and even the Mass together, but the mysteries of the season are beyond him. Now I’ll have a crying baby to add into the mix. The half-heartedness of the secular world is more poisonous to the faith than anything. . .And even while I can find beauty in even the dullest and most plain of Masses (my friends called them drive-through Masses), nothing seems good enough after you have experienced the best.

Sorry. . .Just needed a rant. . .I know I don’t say much here, but you guys are really the only Catholic community I have now.

 

[Em_in_FL]

(((HUGS)))… I’ve been through those “spiritual highs” in the faith as well… and then plunged into the “lows”… it’s hard…
But it does help you have a new perspective of the faith! - staying faithful despite the loneliness and lacking the community fervor…

My prayers are with you…
usccb.org/nab/bible/ecclesiastes/ecclesiastes3.htm

 

[baltobetsy]

You’ve moved into a new phase of living your faith. Apparently, God now considers you mature enough to share the Cross. All the beauty and good times have been stripped away and all that’s left are you and Jesus and suffering. In truth, there’s nothing more intimate than that. Stay close by His side, perhaps remembering that He has to listen to the horrid music also. Try to make your heart a beautiful place of consolation for Jesus.

Betsy

 

[LSK]

Betsy is right. Now comes the time when your faith will really shine - when it ain’t so fun and it is lots tougher.

sigh…YOU ARE IN MY PRAYERS and please give the baby a big kiss from her cyber aunties and uncles!

 

[GraceDK]

When I was in college, the Triduum was my favorite part of the year. The services we had were beautiful almost beyond description. … we wanted to experience it all. The following week, even the daily Masses were huge celebrations, filled with the joy of the resurrected Christ.

Now I’m living on the other side of the country. I love my church parish for being involved and family-friendly, but anyone will tell you that the music is atrocious. The first time I celebrated Holy Thursday there, I started crying because it was so ugly. I’ve started to drive over to my dad’s place a few hours away because at least his church has some reasonable services. **But my old friends are scattered all over the country now, and all of the vibrant, fun, Catholic people who made my faith real will not be there. ** I love my Baptist husband, and we can share prayer, the Bible, and even the Mass together, but the mysteries of the season are beyond him. Now I’ll have a crying baby to add into the mix. The half-heartedness of the secular world is more poisonous to the faith than anything. . .And even while I can find beauty in even the dullest and most plain of Masses (my friends called them drive-through Masses), nothing seems good enough after you have experienced the best.

Sorry. . .Just needed a rant. . .I know I don’t say much here, but you guys are really the only Catholic community I have now.

Dear sister in Jesus.

I think what worries me most about your post is that which I have underlined.
Do you love Jesus ?

That being said I understand that we need to also find living fellowship and encouragement in the Masses in Church (good preaching, true friendships, good music) all of this is needed here in time and in the world to encourage our faith in Christ and making that faith and love you share with Him in your daily prayerlife - which is the foundation of everything else - able to grow in peace. Walking alone is no fun… I am sort of in the same situation.
I’d just like some good preaching and some Catholic fellowship. I think we can not talk about “fullness of truth” if we dont have “fullness of love” and “fullness of the Word”…

I think the problem with the Catholic Church is that its everyone’s church and thus no one’s church… no one then takes responsibility… we are just a big crowd of strangers looking to the priest to get things done. This is a total contradiction to Pauls letters to the Corinthians where the congregations should be full of ministries, that those who can preach, preach, those who can sing, sing, those who can prophesy, prophesy…
… Nuf said.

Beauty of icons, music etc will never be a deep issue for me. But I understand what you say about missing your friends… So… can you possibly start a new group in your Church, maybe for young couples or something???

Grace :grouphug:

 

[Cajun_Girl]

Stay close by His side, perhaps remembering that He has to listen to the horrid music also.
Betsy

Thanks, that made me smile. Actually, I guess I shouldn’t be talking, because God has seen fit to make me croak like a frog.

Thanks, everybody. When I left college, I knew that I had a huge decision before me. I could find another Catholic community and shut myself away from the world, or I could live in the world and try to be an example for Christ. I chose the latter, or rather it seemed to be chosen for me, and I really don’t have any regrets. God has provided me with loved ones, a family, a sweet baby, and so much more. I do get a little down sometimes when I remember how He first called me. But I knew even then that the spiritual consolations weren’t what it was really all about.