Am I a living saint.......why is exam. conscience so tough?!?

[EsclavoDeCristo]

I could use everyones advice.

For the past couple years, making a good examination of conscience has been super tough…especially since coming to know the Lord more profoundly / having a conversion experience. Now I don’t have all the “big” sins that I did before.

I go to confession knowing and feeling the weight of my sins, but when I confess, although I am doing so after much prayer and reflection (and even after reading several good examinations of conscience pamphlets) I feel as though I am missing something or that my sins do not add up to the weight of conviction that I feel. Does that make sense?

Basically I would like some feedback on if others have had this experience and if so, what they have done to overcome it.

Any thoughts or advice are greatly appreciated. Thanks in advance!

 

[MarySon]

CCC #1454 states that the examination of conscience should be made in the light of the Word of God. Some of the passages useful for that could be found in the Sermon of the Mountain and the apostolic teaching. Here are Scripture fragments that you may want to reflect upon: Mt 5-7, Rom 12-15, 1 Cor 12-13, Gal 5 and Eph 4-6, for example

 

[EsclavoDeCristo]

MarySon:

CCC #1454 states that the examination of conscience should be made in the light of the Word of God. Some of the passages useful for that could be found in the Sermon of the Mountain and the apostolic teaching. Here are Scripture fragments that you may want to reflect upon: Mt 5-7, Rom 12-15, 1 Cor 12-13, Gal 5 and Eph 4-6, for example

Thanks for the passages. I will definitly check them out!

The thing that is difficult for me to do is to make it a sacrament from the heart and not just the head…

 

[puzzleannie]

making the sacrament from the head is enough until the heart feels enough compunction to generate more perfect contrition. the will to acknowledge and be contrite is what is required, the emotional content is not required or even a very good barometer of what is going on in the soul.

you are feeling compunction for past sins, which is a good thing, because it is assisting in the process of freeing you from attachment to those sins, and the desires which led to those sins. A snare that entraps many new converts is sublimating the desire for sin in another equally damaging way after the first sin has been given up. Especially in a way that due to the Deceiver appears to be good.

For instance, a desire for sensual stimulation that leads to disordered physical appetites and sins of the senses especially sexually sin or sinful indulgence in physical pleasure of any kind, is sublimated in a relentless seeking for spiritual pleasures and consolations. The new convert is deceived into thinking that because he is after spiritual stimulation and satisfaction that is a good, and therefore his sinful desire is gone.

A wise priest at a retreat recently called this “spiritual masturbation”, such as always going to hear about visionaries, looking at the latest appearance of Mary on a taco or Jesus on a storefront window, seeking out people who claim to have visions, always going to retreats or conferences looking for an emotional “high”. That is not to say legitimate interest in experiences of saints is wrong, but neglecting more mundane spiritual duties because “they are not feeding me or I don’t feel anything” to go after such emotional experiences is what he is talking about. Undertaking excessive penances because of the physical stimulation they provide also comes under this category.

that is why a soul who is progressing needs a good spiritual director, and that is also why confession is such a valuable sacrament, because it seeks to purify, not stimulate, the soul.