Am I in Mortal Sin? Blasphemous Thought

[14thill]

I’ll try to write this in a way that can make sense though the Problem I have to ask about and the fact that I write it here could probably have to do with my OCD.

All was going well during the Ash Wednesday Mass when we started singing a traditional latin hymn and one of the words suddenly sounded like a curse in my mother tongue (I’d sung it before but this was the first time I had a Notion like that). I should note that I have a wry sense of humour and I would normally be tempted to laugh at the most inappropriate things, but for the life of me I cannot remember if I cracked a smile or not (I must have done my best to repress it) Nevertheless, I did not want to repeat the curse word/thought in my mind, but sometimes in my head there is this voice that gets the best of me, I feel too much pressure or am caught offguard and find myself repeating thoughts I didn’t wish to repeat. This could be because of my OCD, and I felt bad immediately of course and would never want to blaspheme against God because not only do I love Him, but I also fear Him (I’m simply not that stupid.)

But being not of complete Sound mind? Or perhaps because I’m too scrupulous? I have to ask if I’m in mortal sin or not, because I really want to take the Eucharist and my priest is away, where I live it’s a tad harder to find a confessional right before mass. Thank you so much in advance.

 

[peter26]

There is no sin here. If a thought comes into your head and you don’t engage with it, you commit no sin (certainly no mortal sin). Also with OCD you can experience “intrusive” thoughts, thoughts you do not want that invade your mind. You are not responsible for these. If one comes into your head that disturbs you, try mentally saying the Prayer to St Michael the Archangel. Be at peace and do not worry.

 

[14thill]

Thank you very much, I’ll try my best to remember the prayer. I still have to ask though;.and please forgive and understand me; Am I still without mortal sin if I have somewhat repeated the curse word in my mind and/or smiled?
I must have tried to fight it, but I cannot be sure, being in this state of mind, I always feel self-doubt and guilt…

 

[peter26]

You must fully consent to an action for it to be a mortal sin. From what you have said, I would say you are not. Talk to your confessor however, not because you have sinned, but because you could possibly use some advice tp help with what might be a scrupulous tendency.