Am I in Mortal Sin?

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WalkWithMe123

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I want to start off with one point:

I am not asking this to get out of confession. I love the sacrament. I just don’t have the opportunity to go in the next few days.

Anyways, I’ve struggled with the often intertwined sins of masturbation and pornography the past few years. It’s an addiction. I went to reconciliation about two weeks ago and have been resisting the sins well until yesterday. I fell into the trap of both of them. But, through it all i felt like I wasn’t able to control myself, the addictive part of the situation. I know that the conditions for a mortal sin are 1) grave matter 2) full knowledge and 3) complete consent. The first two are a definite “yes”, but the third, I don’t think I had complete consent. Again…not trying to get out of reconciliation. Just searching for a definitive answer. Either outcome is negative really…the degrees of a sin are not something to rejoice about. But please don’t hold back and just tell me what I need to hear. Thank you.
 
Just go to confession. Nobody is gonna be able to tell you if it’s a mortal sin or not because they don’t know everything. If it’s grave matter, which this is, then you should just go to confession to be safe.
 
Here’s one thing that’ll lift your spirits, though. Saint Alphonsus Liguori wrote a hypothetical scenario about some robbers who committed mortal sins, and then repented. They wanted to go to confession, but lacked the opportunity. So they started to go to a place where they could get confession. On their way, they all got killed. However, Saint Alphonsus wrote, these souls would not go to Hell, but rather would go to Heaven. For they would have received confession if they had the ability, so their wills were in conformity with that of God’s and they would be found in His Mercy.

Therefore one can reasonably say that even if your sin was mortal (which I personally doubt, in light of your battle against these sins and the addictive nature of the struggle), you would not be going to Hell over this if you died, because you’re planning on going to Confession as soon as you get the opportunity.
 
Your question shows that, you know that such act is wrong,immoral and you want to decease from it, and is proper for you to ask as you did because our reason sometimes try for self justification but my advise is for you to go to confession immediately you are disposed, because it cause you nothing to go to confession but rather receive more grace…After this mather, I will like you to indulge more of your time in reading some of the church’s spirit elevating books like The Book Of Saints,apocalypse videos,the passion of christ video etc. This will help you a lot and try to prevent occasions that lead to it also pray for God’s intervention because you can’t control it by your power but Gods…May Our Mother Perpetual Of Intercede For You…Amen
GOD HELP US AND LET YOUR GREAT LIGHT SHINE ON OUR DARKNSS…PAX CHRISTI
 
Thomas Merton says, “He who sins, yet despises his sin, is not a sinner in the fullest sense of the word.”
 
The only way that I have been taught that you can avoid hell if you die before confessing and receiving absolution for a mortal sin is if you make a perfect act of contrition and have the sincere intention of going to confession as soon as you possibly can (not waiting until your earliest convenience). Being on your way to confession would not be enough absent perfect act of contrition. You can avoid hell with even imperfect contrition through the sacrament.

Our society is too permissive these days and the “I can’t help it” excuse becomes a perpetual cycle. Are you doing it b/c you truly can’t help it or b/c you think you can avoid the consequences by telling yourself you can’t help it? You’re not going to fool God regardless of whatever “feel good” sympathetic coddling you may find on earth.

Even if it’s not a mortal sin in your case, you seem to acknowledge that it’s a very serious offense against God. Do you know that purgatory is as real as hell and we can hardly imagine the severity of suffering that occurs there. Want to “cool your heels” there until your permitted into Heaven which may not be until the end of the world?

Get a handle on yourself (no pun intended) and stop this sinning.
 
It’s still mortal sin in the eyes of God. Remember not matter what the sin is be it swearing or masterbating, to God it’s still like putting a knife through his heart. It is written that we who sin after being baptized are worse off than the people who killed our Lord.
 
If your contrition is perfect, you will never commit that sin again. You would rather die.
 
RadRomCath said:
Our society is too permissive these days and the “I can’t help it” excuse becomes a perpetual cycle. Are you doing it b/c you truly can’t help it or b/c you think you can avoid the consequences by telling yourself you can’t help it? You’re not going to fool God regardless of whatever “feel good” sympathetic coddling you may find on earth.

Even if it’s not a mortal sin in your case, you seem to acknowledge that it’s a very serious offense against God. Do you know that purgatory is as real as hell and we can hardly imagine the severity of suffering that occurs there. Want to “cool your heels” there until your permitted into Heaven which may not be until the end of the world?

Get a handle on yourself (no pun intended) and stop this sinning.
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Breaking an addictive habit is hard. I struggled against lustful thoughts for years (a similar sin), and it’s painful and very difficult. It requires heroism of us, and God supplies grace to overcome, in the end, even if that end is after death. There are defeats and victories. It’s not an easy battle. It’s a long, grinding one.

Our spiritual brothers who are fighting this battle deserve compassion and encouragement.
 
Lief Erikson,

Please explain what you mean by “God supplies grace to overcome . . . even if that end is after death.”

The OP titled his thread “Am I in Mortal Sin?” In his post he insists on hearing the straight truth rather than a bunch of feel-goodism. I do not presume to judge whether he his or is not going to hell. But the honest and charitable answer to his query is “quite possibly.” Furthermore, if he is under the mistaken idea that anything other than a mortal sin will merely get him “grounded” or put in “time-out,” then it is most charitable to remind him that purgatory is anything but a walk in the park.

Telling him–assuring him–that he is going to Heaven just because he intends to go to confession may lead him to excessively rely on the mercy of God and lose his soul. I did not see where he explains why he can’t get to confession for awhile and I still believe perfect v. imperfect contrition is relevant.
 
WalkWithMe123 said:
I want to start off with one point:

I am not asking this to get out of confession. I love the sacrament. I just don’t have the opportunity to go in the next few days.

Anyways, I’ve struggled with the often intertwined sins of masturbation and pornography the past few years. It’s an addiction. I went to reconciliation about two weeks ago and have been resisting the sins well until yesterday. I fell into the trap of both of them. But, through it all i felt like I wasn’t able to control myself, the addictive part of the situation. I know that the conditions for a mortal sin are 1) grave matter 2) full knowledge and 3) complete consent. The first two are a definite “yes”, but the third, I don’t think I had complete consent. Again…not trying to get out of reconciliation. Just searching for a definitive answer. Either outcome is negative really…the degrees of a sin are not something to rejoice about. But please don’t hold back and just tell me what I need to hear. Thank you.
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No one can know the psychology of your soul. I would however ask my self what I mean by addiction. If I eat pizza on Ash Wednesday because I am hungry, I commit a sin even though I am programmed to eat and even though I feel guilty while doing it. Addiction is something else…

I also think that we sometimes are too focused on reasoning about what is mortal and what is not. The important thing is that you did something horrible and that you are willing to try and change. The next time you are in this situation, just call your mother, take a painfully cold shower or walk in public or something. Flee what is put in front of you just like it was leprosy or a bomb…

The meta discussion about whether or not you go to hell if you do not have access to a Priest is however somehow strange to me. I have heard both from reliable sources, but I think no one can know for sure even though most of us tend to trust in the mercy of God. Making such strong statements as saying that these people are damned demands more then “I have been taught…”.
 
RadRomCath said:
Lief Erikson,

Please explain what you mean by “God supplies grace to overcome . . . even if that end is after death.”
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My answer to that would be what I wrote in post #4. Purgatory also is a place where we can receive grace to overcome our sinful attachments, which is what I mean by the battle continuing after death.
RadRomCath said:
The OP titled his thread “Am I in Mortal Sin?” In his post he insists on hearing the straight truth rather than a bunch of feel-goodism. I do not presume to judge whether he his or is not going to hell. But the honest and charitable answer to his query is “quite possibly.” Furthermore, if he is under the mistaken idea that anything other than a mortal sin will merely get him “grounded” or put in “time-out,” then it is most charitable to remind him that purgatory is anything but a walk in the park.
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But our man here indicated that he loves the sacrament and is planning to get to it as soon as he can. That is taking the matter seriously.

Also, I remember in “Introduction to a Devout Life” reading St. Francis de Sales indicate that it’s a very good thing to give people the benefit of the doubt rather than being suspicious.

And when we see one of our own who’s going through a hard time, a tough, long-term inner battle that entails both victories and defeats, for the sake of Christ, that one deserves our support. Think how many people aren’t trying to resist these temptations at all. When one has them, the willingness to try to fight for Christ is valiant and noble.
RadRomCath said:
Telling him–assuring him–that he is going to Heaven just because he intends to go to confession may lead him to excessively rely on the mercy of God and lose his soul. I did not see where he explains why he can’t get to confession for awhile and I still believe perfect v. imperfect contrition is relevant.
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Here’s what St. Maximilian Kolbe wrote on perfect contrition:

“Whoever can, should receive the Sacrament of Penance. Whoever cannot, because of prohibiting circumstances, should cleanse his soul by acts of perfect contrition: i.e., the sorrow of a loving child who does not consider so much the pain or reward as he does the pardon from his father and mother to whom he has brought displeasure.”

The sorrow of a loving child is what perfect contrition means–not necessarily the readiness to cut across all other obligations to work or family in order to make the quickest possible confession.
 
I think Sections 1483 and 1484 of the Catechism of The Catholic Church are instructive on the issue: usccb.org/beliefs-and-teachings/what-we-believe/catechism/catechism-of-the-catholic-church/epub/index.cfm

Nils makes an excellent point–nobody knows with certainty whether or not the conduct is a mortal sin in your particular case and nobody knows with certainty whether or not you would go to hell should you die before getting to the Sacrament of Reconciliation. We should all hope for the mercy of God. But to excessively rely on it constitutes yet another sin–it is presumption and is a sin against the Holy Spirit.

The safest course of action is to assume it is a mortal sin and go to confession ASAP. I would not want to be standing before a judge–any judge–let alone the ultimate Judge–and the only things I could say for myself be “I couldn’t help it” and “somebody told me that you would be nice and understanding.”
 
Thanks for your post #13 Lief. Absolutely in the end the sinful attachments of those in purgatory will be gone. Thanks also for posting the information on perfect and imperfect contrition. I should not have been so lazy as to not back up my own post.
 
WWW123, I to am struggling with the same affliction of sin. I came to Catholic Answers looking for answers. The first thread I came to was yours and I’m not alone. All the answers were helpful esp. Liefs and Rads. Confession for me is Saturday at 3:30 and I think I will carry and refer to a small bible in my hand 24/7 as a constant reminder and guidance.
 
Thank you all so much for the support. I couldn’t stand waiting until Saturday to go to reconciliation, so I caught up with a priest recently after morning mass. He was very gracious. Ready to keep fighting the good fight. :knight2:
 
WalkWithMe123 said:
Thank you all so much for the support. I couldn’t stand waiting until Saturday to go to reconciliation, so I caught up with a priest recently after morning mass. He was very gracious. Ready to keep fighting the good fight. :knight2:
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That is wonderful news!! Cleave to the sacraments and pray the Rosary. Definitely keep fighting the good fight!!
 
WalkWithMe123 said:
Thank you all so much for the support. I couldn’t stand waiting until Saturday to go to reconciliation, so I caught up with a priest recently after morning mass. He was very gracious. Ready to keep fighting the good fight. :knight2:
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😃 Praise God!
 
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