Am I taking advantage of?

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angelcrystal85

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Hello Everyone,

I don’t even know how to start, but here it goes. I have been seeing this therapist/counselor that also does Catholic spiritual counseling For almost 2 years. This person is writing a book and ask me to design the book cover for free since she has no money, but if I do it I am doing it for God, and is a way to help people. She said she felt in prayer, God ask her for me to design it. I started doing it out of my heart because I love helping. But now I feel she is taking advantage of me, she wants everything fast, went to my house and was over my shoulder exactly how she wanted it designed until past 1am. I was exhausted, tired, and she did not cared. She said I need to use my talents for God, if we don’t when we died He will ask us why I didn’t Use the talents to help people for heaven. I do pay for her therapy sessions, but she will not pay me a cent of my design work, but she will make Money on the book. I have talk to several people and everyone tells me she is manipulating me, using me, she is not doing it for God but for her own interest. She knows me, and I am afraid she is using it to control me. I been feeling very angry and betrayed on someone that I trust. I want to stop Therapy with her, and stop the designs too. I know she will manipulate me and try to use God as a way to guilt trip me to do it. How can I approach this situation in a fair way. Thanks everyone!
 
You just tell her that this is inappropriate and stop seeing her. Do not feel compelled to do anything more for her.

I just would not trust the therapeutic judgment of a therapist who crosses that particular boundary.

Also, consider reporting her to whatever her licensing board is.
 
Yes she is using you.

Please get help from the therapist licensing board-- report her abusive behavior!

I agree-- cut contact with this person! Find another therapist!
 
Block her and do not feel obliged to talk to her.

She’s doing something wrong and if she’s any good at her job at all, she ought to know what she’s doing wrong.

This is abusive behavior on her part.
 
A good therapist would keep their relationship with clients professional, this is a weird thing to ask you to do. I would find another therapist.
 
So, her assertion is that you’re doing it for God because you’re not getting paid for it?

Ask her if she’s writing the book for God by the same measure.

If you want to continue, I would insist upon a royalty for the work. If she can’t pay you now, make her pay you when the books sell.
 
I agree with all posters that this relationship should be terminated as her using the"God card" to get a free service is most unprofessional conduct. I also think strongly that you should report this to the appropriate licensing board to save other clients from possible manipulation. That is so unbelievable to me that she would have the audacity to do this; actually using God as her way of getting something free.

Prayers that you will find a new therapist/counselor that will meet your needs.

God Bless,

Mary.
 
Thanks everyone! I do feel she is going to make money and I will not get a scent. I spoke to someone where she did something similar. Wants to get things done for free and she makes money off them. I have the design done allready, I dont know if I want my designs to be used for a woman that is not doing things right. I am a very successful designer working for a top company in my field, I dont have the necessity to do things for free for my portfolio. I am just fearful speaking to her. She will guilt trip me to do it. Also, I want to moved back to my hometown, I currently live in a very dangerous city where I dont know no one. I told her I am unhappy here and is making me depressed, I want to move back to my hometown. She said Icant because I am called to stay in the city because God has a mission for me there. But I am unhappy, even thinking of looking for a nee position makes me feel guilty. I miss my friends and family alot. I own a home back in my hometown.
 
Once in a while someone will be aware of a mission or calling on the life of another person. However, that calling would normally be a fulfillment of something the person already knows in his/her heart and so simply acts as a confirmation. The fact that she is trying to manipulate you into giving her something for free that you normally wouldn’t do plus she won’t pay you for it but expects you to keep paying her? You’re under no obligation to her whatsoever. She is your employee (You are paying for sessions) and she is taking advantage of you.

As far as the stuff about God wants you to stay where you are now and not move back to your hometown. Given the track record she already has, I wouldn’t believe it. You are not obligated to speak to her at all. Who knows maybe that design you’ve already done is one that God has an entirely different use for.

Cut off any contact and run away as fast as you can… so to speak.
 
angelcrystal85 said:
Thanks everyone! I do feel she is going to make money and I will not get a scent. I spoke to someone where she did something similar. Wants to get things done for free and she makes money off them. I have the design done allready, I dont know if I want my designs to be used for a woman that is not doing things right. I am a very successful designer working for a top company in my field, I dont have the necessity to do things for free for my portfolio. I am just fearful speaking to her. She will guilt trip me to do it. Also, I want to moved back to my hometown, I currently live in a very dangerous city where I dont know no one. I told her I am unhappy here and is making me depressed, I want to move back to my hometown. She said Icant because I am called to stay in the city because God has a mission for me there. But I am unhappy, even thinking of looking for a nee position makes me feel guilty. I miss my friends and family alot. I own a home back in my hometown.
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–Don’t give the design to her.
–Don’t speak to her.
–Feel free to move back to your home town.

Best wishes!
 
It is okay and essential to both your mental and spiritual well-being to have boundaries
 
Your in a sticky situation. My best advice would be that you copy your post and present it to your priest/confessor. He would be better to deal with it than any of us. I will pray for your problem and hope that it gets resolved in a positive manner. Peace.
 
She’s a therapist with no money? She can’t be a very good one.
I agree with the other posters, you are being manipulated. Talk to your priest and follow your instincts. Find a real professional therapist who will support your goals, not push her own goals on you.
God bless.

.
 
angelcrystal85 said:
Hello Everyone,

I don’t even know how to start, but here it goes. I have been seeing this therapist/counselor that also does Catholic spiritual counseling For almost 2 years. This person is writing a book and ask me to design the book cover for free since she has no money, but if I do it I am doing it for God, and is a way to help people. She said she felt in prayer, God ask her for me to design it. I started doing it out of my heart because I love helping. But now I feel she is taking advantage of me, she wants everything fast, went to my house and was over my shoulder exactly how she wanted it designed until past 1am. I was exhausted, tired, and she did not cared. She said I need to use my talents for God, if we don’t when we died He will ask us why I didn’t Use the talents to help people for heaven. I do pay for her therapy sessions, but she will not pay me a cent of my design work, but she will make Money on the book. I have talk to several people and everyone tells me she is manipulating me, using me, she is not doing it for God but for her own interest. She knows me, and I am afraid she is using it to control me. I been feeling very angry and betrayed on someone that I trust. I want to stop Therapy with her, and stop the designs too. I know she will manipulate me and try to use God as a way to guilt trip me to do it. How can I approach this situation in a fair way. Thanks everyone!
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Yeah she is taking advantage. You should tell her to take a hike.
 
This person is taking advantage of you and your kind nature.

I would have to separate myself from her and the situation entirely. Your work is valuable and obviously very good, that’s why she would like to use your design for her book. If she is getting paid royalties, then she should be paying you. Fair is fair.

Talk to your priest to see how you can resolve this.

Send up prayers also!
 
Asking you to do the artwork, even if she were paying you full price, could be considered unethical. This is highly unethical, terminate the relationship, cancel your next appointment and block this person. Then, report her to the proper licensing/ credentialing boards.

I find PPs advice to contact your priest baffling, unless this was a referral you received from him or she’s affiliated with the parish.
 
angelcrystal85 said:
Thanks everyone! I do feel she is going to make money and I will not get a scent. I spoke to someone where she did something similar. Wants to get things done for free and she makes money off them. I have the design done allready, I dont know if I want my designs to be used for a woman that is not doing things right. I am a very successful designer working for a top company in my field, I dont have the necessity to do things for free for my portfolio. I am just fearful speaking to her. She will guilt trip me to do it. Also, I want to moved back to my hometown, I currently live in a very dangerous city where I dont know no one. I told her I am unhappy here and is making me depressed, I want to move back to my hometown. She said Icant because I am called to stay in the city because God has a mission for me there. But I am unhappy, even thinking of looking for a nee position makes me feel guilty. I miss my friends and family alot. I own a home back in my hometown.
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You need to cut this person off. Come on surely you can see that she wants you there for her own needs rather than because God is telling you to stay via her as a prophet. It’s not selfish to look after your own wellbeing and it sounds like you will do much better in your hometown.
 
Hello everyone! Thank you so much for your advice! I talk to a priest today. The first thing he said was run away from her and the situation as far as I can. I got his blessings of cutting her off. Im about to have the conversation with her please keep me in your prayers since she will use manipulation tricks or guilt trip me. I went to adoration, dis my prayers and ask God to help me. This is the person that knows my deepest life experiences. Thanks you so much wveryone God bless you!!!
 
NFPWife said:
Asking you to do the artwork, even if she were paying you full price, could be considered unethical. This is highly unethical, terminate the relationship, cancel your next appointment and block this person. Then, report her to the proper licensing/ credentialing boards.

I find PPs advice to contact your priest baffling, unless this was a referral you received from him or she’s affiliated with the parish.
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Yes, I found the ask your priest baffling as well.
 
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