Am I wrong to include my sister's boyfriend at her baby shower?

[julieannh]

My sister is pregnant with her first child and not married. I am throwing her a baby shower and including our family, her friends, her boyfriend (the baby’s dad), and his family. My mom is upset with me because she feels as though my sister is living in mortal sin and I am condoning it by accepting him and including him. She doesn’t feel as though he should have any rights. I feel as though my sister knows where I stand, and will pull away from me if I don’t include her boyfriend or if I speak against the situation (she is also getting ready to move in with him). I just want to do the right thing, but now I’m not sure what it is. Can you help me?

 

[Michelle_Arnold]

In this situation, it seems to me that you are not including “your sister’s boyfriend” but your niece or nephew’s father. Including his family is also kind since the new child will be their family member also. If you have already announced to everyone who is invited, I’m not sure there is anything you can do now to please your mother other than to try to get her to accept that this is her grandchild’s father and family, and excluding them will only harm her own interests. If you have not yet announced the guest list, you could choose to invite only women (the traditional attendees of showers), thus leaving out the baby’s father on the basis of this being a “hen party” but including his close female relatives.