An issue of safety--should I make a big deal out of this?

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A five year old girl in our homeschool group was raped by an intruder (an illegal immigrant). He broke in the back door. The mom and an older brother caught and held him until the police arrived.

A couple months ago, a lady told me that a six year old was snatched from a good neighborhood in Chicago. In fact, she was taken from her own fenced in yard. The girl was released unharmed. The police think that the kidnapper was working up his nerve to follow through with an attack. The next little girl will probably not be so lucky.

Our seven year old sleeps in a front bedroom with two old windows. Plus, the front door is only five feet from her room. We sleep upstairs in an attic bedroom. I want to either move her upstairs and move us into the front room. Or…I want to get a big dog. It’s always bothered me to have her in the front bedroom, but with recent events, I’m feeling stronger about it.

My dh, though, doesn’t want to move. He likes having a room away from the hustle and bustle of the kids. Plus, he likes having our own bathroom.( Me, too). He doesn’t want a dog because we don’t have a fenced yard. So, it will be a hassle to take care of a dog.

He usually just ignores me when I have strong ideas about the family that he doesn’t agree with. Eventually, I just give up out of frustration.

Is this an issue I should stand strong on?
 
I would move her upstairs. protection of children is paramount, given there have been attacks in your area. There would be no question in my mind. Any inconvenience to me would be minor to protect my children.
 
An alarm on the frontdoor and windows perhaps? Better locks? Maybe use the money you would have spent on a dog replacing the old windows?

Also, have the house blessed, sprinkle holy water and pray the St Michael prayer and Gaurdian Angel prayer each night.

God bless you all.
 
aboverubies said:
An alarm on the frontdoor and windows perhaps? Better locks? Maybe use the money you would have spent on a dog replacing the old windows?

Also, have the house blessed, sprinkle holy water and pray the St Michael prayer and Gaurdian Angel prayer each night.

God bless you all.
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👍 Great ideas! You could put net/lace curtains in her window so that if someone looked in from the outside (during the day), they wouldn’t really be able to see that it was a little girl’s room. And of course make sure that you close the blinds as soon as it gets darker outside, for the same reason.

When you have your house blessed, see if the priest can also enthrone the Sacred and Immaculate Hearts ❤️
 
I wanted to add that I would not dismiss the feelings you’re having. They may be the promptings of the Holy Spirit and your daughter’s Guardian Angel. How about getting a fake security system sign to place in your yard?
 
I’m just puzzled that a grown man would leave a seven-year-old girl to be the home’s first line of defense and warning. While he takes refuge in his out of the way bedroom up back.

Good job! 👍

Will he at least allow her to carry a sidearm so she can get off a few warning shots before any intruder gets to him?

If his kids are kidnapped or hurt, he won’t have to worry about that pesky hustle and bustle any more.
He usually just ignores me when I have strong ideas about the family that he doesn’t agree with. Eventually, I just give up out of frustration.
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My prayers are with you. Sounds like you have many other problems besides old windows.

When it comes to your family’s safety and well-being, never ignore your instincts. That kind of man is wonderful at making you eventually doubt and question your instincts. Do not allow that to happen. If his personal comfort is more important than the safety of your children, then you are all they have to look out for them. Don’t ignore your instincts.
 
I have a close relative who is a retired police officer. He says alarm systems generally aren’t worth the money and there are thousands of false alarms for every one real emergency. Some places have fines if you have a false alarm. Mostly it creates a “Boy who cried Wolf” effect.

Take the money you would spend on an alarm system and invest in the most secure doors, locks, and windows you can find.
 
I’d move her in a heartbeat.

My own parents had the same safety concerns when I was growing up and they slept in an 8x8 downstairs bedroom so we 6 kids could have the upper master bedroom and 1other bedroom. If anybody broke in they would have to go through my armed father first. We kids felt protected and that we were their first priority. Did they like that bedroom? Not one bit~ It didn’t even have a closet. All that fit was the bed and 1 dresser they shared.

I don’t keep firearms in my house, but in your shoes I would invest in good locks, bless our home frequently with holy water, and make sure any kids were on the second level.
 
Do you think the neighborhood is getting more dangerous? Did these recent events occur near your house? Do you think they constitute a trend?

Maybe your husband doesn’t agree because he doesn’t think that the neighborhood is getting more dangerous. Maybe you could get advice from your local police department that would convince him. Men respond to things like that.
 
I would make a big deal out if it!

DH & I bought our house when ther were just the two of us. He wanted to use the finished upstairs (former attic) as our bedroom. Sounded like a good idea except that we were already in the adoption process & I refused to leave a child downstairs. He put up a fuss & I told him that if he wanted to sleep upstairs he would be sleeping alone - I would be downstairs near our daughter.

End of debate.👍
 
You should do ALL of these:
  1. Stand firm on this and move her upstairs.
  2. Either get an alarm installed or put alarm logo stickers on your doors and front windows.
  3. Buy a gun. Either a 9mm (or higher) or a simple shotgun.
  4. Learn how to shoot the gun.
  5. Consider moving to a different area.
  6. Do not take this lightly. Imagine the horrible regret if something happened.
May God bless and protect you!
 
Well, put her upstairs and then, in case of fire, she might not be able to get down the stairs and you might not be able to get upstairs to help her.

Isn’t anywhere in a house just as dangerous as anywhere else? Front bedrooms have easy street access, but back bedrooms are in the shadows and someone can come and go without being seen. Upstairs bedrooms are harder to get in to, but also harder to get out of in an emergency; you could become trapped.

I don’t know. I think you could make a case for either sleeping arrangement.
 
I’d move her AND get the locks and new windows. I would be nervous sleeping on a different floor than my kids, and more nervous if the kids were more accessible.

Even if you could be convinced nothing will happen, you’ll still be worried about it. Your own peace of mind is important as well as the safety of your daughter.
 
This is exactly why we can’t use the master bedroom clear at the other end of the house - because then the kids would be all alone in the front of the house.

How do some of you parents manage sleeping so far from your children? That would drive me insane with worry - burglars, predators, fires, severe storms, etc. There is no way I could ever be on the main floor and have kids upstairs, or be upstairs and have kids on the main floor.

OP - isn’t there a bedroom on the main floor you could move into so you and dd would BOTH be on the same floor, in close proximity?
 
Yes, definitely make a big deal out of it, but the way the world is today we all should be taking sensible precautions.
aboverubies said:
Maybe use the money you would have spent on a dog replacing the old windows?
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Actually, I’ve heard a dog is one of the best lines of defense in the sense that its bark can alert one to someone snooping.

As far as the gun idea is concerned…all I can say is before you even think about it, take an NRA safety course and learn how to safely store a weapon when there are children in the house.
 
If the area is that unsafe, I’d pack up and move.

For the sake of nightime emergencies, young children should be close to mom/dad.
 
PaulinVA said:
Well, put her upstairs and then, in case of fire, she might not be able to get down the stairs and you might not be able to get upstairs to help her.

Isn’t anywhere in a house just as dangerous as anywhere else? Front bedrooms have easy street access, but back bedrooms are in the shadows and someone can come and go without being seen. Upstairs bedrooms are harder to get in to, but also harder to get out of in an emergency; you could become trapped.

I don’t know. I think you could make a case for either sleeping arrangement.
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We do live in an old house. Maybe fire *would *be a greater threat.

Maybe a dog would be the best option.
 
I have huge issues with young families living in the houses where the master bedroom is on the ground floor and the children are upstairs. That might be great and quiet for mom and dad, but I think it’s horrendous for the children.

Let me share a story:

I once was a guest in one such palatial house. I was in an upstairs bedroom sleeping and heard one of the children of the house crying quietly. I went out and the little 4 year old was sitting on the steps going downstairs and crying to himself. He was too scared to go down in the dark to his parents’ room. But he had had a bad dream. I comforted him and put him back to bed and sat with him till he drifted off. The next morning I mentioned it, and realized the parents were completely unaware whether this was a common thing.

:eek:
 
leonie said:
A five year old girl in our homeschool group was raped by an intruder (an illegal immigrant). He broke in the back door. The mom and an older brother caught and held him until the police arrived.

A couple months ago, a lady told me that a six year old was snatched from a good neighborhood in Chicago. In fact, she was taken from her own fenced in yard. The girl was released unharmed. The police think that the kidnapper was working up his nerve to follow through with an attack. The next little girl will probably not be so lucky.

Our seven year old sleeps in a front bedroom with two old windows. Plus, the front door is only five feet from her room. We sleep upstairs in an attic bedroom. I want to either move her upstairs and move us into the front room. Or…I want to get a big dog. It’s always bothered me to have her in the front bedroom, but with recent events, I’m feeling stronger about it.

My dh, though, doesn’t want to move. He likes having a room away from the hustle and bustle of the kids. Plus, he likes having our own bathroom.( Me, too). He doesn’t want a dog because we don’t have a fenced yard. So, it will be a hassle to take care of a dog.

He usually just ignores me when I have strong ideas about the family that he doesn’t agree with. Eventually, I just give up out of frustration.

Is this an issue I should stand strong on?
Click to expand...
This is interesting…I have been having similiar conversations with my dh about our daughter being in the front bedroom. When we first moved, my son decided on the back room…with my daughter in the front…she has a loft style bed, so I’m thinking it might be difficult if someone were to break in…and we keep her blinds drawn always. Do you have a burglar alarm? That would help most definitiely with intruders breaking windows, etc…we also have one where even if someone opens a door anywhere in the house, a loud beeping noise goes off, even if the alarm is not activated. Not sure how loud it would be if we were all sleeping but we also have motion detectors in the house, as well…can never be too safe. Just food for thought.
 
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