An Unusual Family Situation

[trappistrob]

I was raised Catholic but fell away from the church after high school. My wife is the daughter of a Baptist minister and she was very influential in keeping me following a spiritual path. We had been attending her father’s church semi-regularly and when our son was born so did he. I returned to the Catholic faith several years ago to my wife’s (and her families) consternation. She eventually came to understand my decision. Her attitude toward her faith has been formed through the lens of her own childhood as a PK (Preachers Kid), i.e. somewhat bitter. I had done very little to evangelize her but she surprised me by deciding on her own to convert to Catholicism. All this time my son, now 9 years old, has been attending the Baptist church and it is all he knows and is comfortable with. With both me and my wife now Catholic I feel that my son should also be Catholic, but the friction between her family and the potential conflict this would set up in my sons attitude toward religion has me reluctant to act. How does one start a 9 year old out in the Catholic faith?

 

[BamaRider]

First welcome home and to the forums.

I’m on here alot, and this is the first time I’ve ever seen this situation, but I can understand all the real and potential problems.

I dunno if I’m smart enough to be of much help, I can only tell ya what I’d do.

At 9 years old, and a lifetime member of the Baptist Church he certainly has ties to the his church. You’re also correct there is going to be a power struggle at any hint of trying to convert him.

Still, if I’d want my son at Mass with me, so I’d bring him in slowly. There is so much difference between a Baptist and Catholic at 9 he’ll never be able to absorb it all. Just start by bringing him to Mass, and answer his questions, you gotta have something to build on, so don’t bring up converting till you feel the time is right.

He’s probably gonna have a real hard time with confession, so I wouldn’t bring that up till he is sure what is going on.

Even if you begin slowly I dunno if it will be successful.

I think the wrong approach is to walk in and inform he’s gonna be Catholic starting next week. At 9 years old I knew my Catholic Faith, no one was ever gonna get me to leave it. I mean you mighta got me in a Protestant Church, but the part you really wanted to be there was gonna be elsewhere.

I’d go into this expecting some kind of conflict with your in laws, but dealig with that is a whole nother thread.

Keep us posted.

 

[Brenda_V]

Guy gave you great advice. I was going to start by saying he must attend Mass with you and your wife, just not an option because he is too young to stay home alone and I personally would never leave my child that age somewhere without me somewhere on the premises (I homeschooled, taught CCD, was the Girl Scout leader etc.)

I don’t know how much you have been taking him to the Baptist church so that would be something to think about. Does he go every week for Sunday School? If not then not sending him won’t be something he misses.

I would also introduce him to the biblical nature of the Mass, don’t worry right now about the other (actually more important) aspect of Mass, but let him see all the Bible readings at Mass. Not knowing all that much about Baptists I do know that they consider the Bible the sole source of their “authority” (I could be wrong there too).

Hope this gives you a starting point to help your son’s at the very least, coming to an understanding of Catholicism.

Oh, and like Guy, I knew my faith at 9 as well and for sure would have had a hard time having someone tell me I was wrong.

 

[Feanaro_s_Wife]

**Well, at 9 he is obviously old enough to know about the spiritual changes in you and your wife. What has been discussed about things like your wife’s conversion etc? How has he reacted?

I agree that he should start attending Mass with you, no strings attached. And make plans for something fun afterwards that will avoid the “I don’t waaaaaaaaaannnnnnnnaaaaaaaa go” scenarios.

At this age it would be best for you to just discuss the new faith in your home as a family, never lecture TO him and just let him observe. Mention options like attending CCD or joining youth groups and let him decide.

This is a tough tough situation and I will pray for your family…**

 

[iluvmybabies]

I was raised Catholic but fell away from the church after high school. My wife is the daughter of a Baptist minister and she was very influential in keeping me following a spiritual path. We had been attending her father’s church semi-regularly and when our son was born so did he. I returned to the Catholic faith several years ago to my wife’s (and her families) consternation. She eventually came to understand my decision. Her attitude toward her faith has been formed through the lens of her own childhood as a PK (Preachers Kid), i.e. somewhat bitter. I had done very little to evangelize her but she surprised me by deciding on her own to convert to Catholicism. All this time my son, now 9 years old, has been attending the Baptist church and it is all he knows and is comfortable with. With both me and my wife now Catholic I feel that my son should also be Catholic, but the friction between her family and the potential conflict this would set up in my sons attitude toward religion has me reluctant to act. How does one start a 9 year old out in the Catholic faith?

HELLO!! AND WELCOME!

I am a CATHOLIC born and raised, lol, and my children are too…If later on in their lives they choose not to be, then let GOD’s will be done, but I will not stop doing what I do and praising GOD like I do and teaching them in GOD’s ways as much as possible…

I would start by taking my child to the priest…Take a tour around church…My kids are classes for their first communion…AND at first they were a bit shy and worried…The priest was kind, loving and caring and took them around to show them the church once they saw how great things were they were excited to go to school…

It just takes a little support, understanding and lots of joy and love for the kids to accept such a wonderful miracle of faith… I try to do this as much as possible and so far they are doing well!!

Good luck and GOD bless!

 

[EvelynEVF]

I was in a similar situation during the process of my conversion. We go to Mass together, and I continued to go to fellowship events at the old church for about a year after confirmation, until my kids had a chance to get to know the kids at the parish. I did other things at the parish, too, but left that negotiable for my kids. They do still go to events at the old church with other family members, but not to services.

It’s actually working out just fine, and both children are being formed as Catholics and not having trouble leaving protestantism behind.