An update and apology for my behavior

[brgregmack]

Back in January a started a thread titled “preventing a breakup” which appears to have been deleted because of what I did. To all those who posted and who tried to reverently point out the truth of my situation, I would like to say I’m sorry. My behavior was deplorable. I would also like to say that you were all right. After trying to remain friends, I finally broke it off completely because no matter what we couldn’t stop fighting, always coming around to the same point. There are still times I think what could’ve been if I’d done things differently or that there’s still a chance we could make it work if we ever got back together, but I push through it by reminding myself that strong emotions aren’t a basis for a strong and lasting relationship. She and I disagree on too many of the things that are important, and the common lens of faith is lacking, which is an essential piece for me.

I’m back getting the help I need from a good sponsor, a therapist, and recommitting to the faith, which I compromised for her during the time we were together. I’ve also started a Holy Hour at my parish which I encourage my fellows to come to whether or not they’re Catholic or even Christian, as I firmly believe that Christ is the Divine Physician and healer of our souls whether or not we realize it (I also consider it covert evangelization ). I’ve also met someone through catholicmatch.com. She knows about my addiction and is very accepting. We are also taking it very slow, as I want to simply enjoy getting to know her and see where He leads us. Again I apologize for my words and actions in the previous thread. Please forgive me and keep me in your prayers.

Pax,
brgregmack

 

[grasscutter]

I didn’t participate in that particular thread, but I just wanted to say that I’m happy for you that things in your life are improving. It sounds like you are making many positive changes and I will keep you in my prayers.

 

[tomgosse]

Praying for your continuing recovery. God bless.

 

[chefmomster2]

Welcome!

 

[tawny]

Back in January a started a thread titled “preventing a breakup” which appears to have been deleted because of what I did. To all those who posted and who tried to reverently point out the truth of my situation, I would like to say I’m sorry. My behavior was deplorable. I would also like to say that you were all right. After trying to remain friends, I finally broke it off completely because no matter what we couldn’t stop fighting, always coming around to the same point. There are still times I think what could’ve been if I’d done things differently or that there’s still a chance we could make it work if we ever got back together, but I push through it by reminding myself that strong emotions aren’t a basis for a strong and lasting relationship. She and I disagree on too many of the things that are important, and the common lens of faith is lacking, which is an essential piece for me.

I’m back getting the help I need from a good sponsor, a therapist, and recommitting to the faith, which I compromised for her during the time we were together. I’ve also started a Holy Hour at my parish which I encourage my fellows to come to whether or not they’re Catholic or even Christian, as I firmly believe that Christ is the Divine Physician and healer of our souls whether or not we realize it (I also consider it covert evangelization ). I’ve also met someone through catholicmatch.com. She knows about my addiction and is very accepting. We are also taking it very slow, as I want to simply enjoy getting to know her and see where He leads us. Again I apologize for my words and actions in the previous thread. Please forgive me and keep me in your prayers.

Pax,
brgregmack

Continued prayers for your intentions.

 

[Irishmom2]

It takes a big person to admit they were wrong, but you apologized and that means a lot. May you find the peace and happiness you deserve. it sounds like lots of good things are going on in your life!

 

[Memaw]

I didn’t participate in that particular thread, but I just wanted to say that I’m happy for you that things in your life are improving. It sounds like you are making many positive changes and I will keep you in my prayers.

I wasn’t on it either and I agree with everything grasscutter said. Prayers and God Bless. Memaw

 

[Hoosier_Daddy]

Back in January a started a thread titled “preventing a breakup” which appears to have been deleted because of what I did. To all those who posted and who tried to reverently point out the truth of my situation, I would like to say I’m sorry. My behavior was deplorable. I would also like to say that you were all right. After trying to remain friends, I finally broke it off completely because no matter what we couldn’t stop fighting, always coming around to the same point. There are still times I think what could’ve been if I’d done things differently or that there’s still a chance we could make it work if we ever got back together, but I push through it by reminding myself that strong emotions aren’t a basis for a strong and lasting relationship. She and I disagree on too many of the things that are important, and the common lens of faith is lacking, which is an essential piece for me.

I’m back getting the help I need from a good sponsor, a therapist, and recommitting to the faith, which I compromised for her during the time we were together. I’ve also started a Holy Hour at my parish which I encourage my fellows to come to whether or not they’re Catholic or even Christian, as I firmly believe that Christ is the Divine Physician and healer of our souls whether or not we realize it (I also consider it covert evangelization ). I’ve also met someone through catholicmatch.com. She knows about my addiction and is very accepting. We are also taking it very slow, as I want to simply enjoy getting to know her and see where He leads us. Again I apologize for my words and actions in the previous thread. Please forgive me and keep me in your prayers.

Pax,
brgregmack

I do remember your thread. I have prayed for you, I continue to do so. I wondered how you were doing and I am SO glad you posted this update.

God Bless you.

 

[brgregmack]

I do remember your thread. I have prayed for you, I continue to do so. I wondered how you were doing and I am SO glad you posted this update.

God Bless you.

Thank you for your continued prayers. I’m sure they’ve been no small part in my coming around. I can see now there were red flags from both my behavior and hers that I simply ignored. I was so blind that I justified and rationalized living in a state of mortal sin for her. I should’ve broken up with her long before we did. It’s been a rough road, and I still have a lot of work to do, but I feel so much happier and at peace now that we’re not together and I’m getting to know someone else who in some ways is similar, so I must have a type, yet has the crucial piece of faith. I’m not making any assumptions that she’s “the one,” as it’s only been a month and I only have that amount of sobriety, but I’m definitely open to wherever He leads. Simply enjoying the process.

 

[Memaw]

Thank you for your continued prayers. I’m sure they’ve been no small part in my coming around. I can see now there were red flags from both my behavior and hers that I simply ignored. I was so blind that I justified and rationalized living in a state of mortal sin for her. I should’ve broken up with her long before we did. It’s been a rough road, and I still have a lot of work to do, but I feel so much happier and at peace now that we’re not together and I’m getting to know someone else who in some ways is similar, so I must have a type, yet has the crucial piece of faith. I’m not making any assumptions that she’s “the one,” as it’s only been a month and I only have that amount of sobriety, but I’m definitely open to wherever He leads. Simply enjoying the process.

Just make sure it’s HIM leading you both. That’s the safe way. Prayers and God Bless, Memaw

 

[brgregmack]

Just make sure it’s HIM leading you both. That’s the safe way. Prayers and God Bless, Memaw

LOTS of prayer coupled with asking advice from my sponsor, therapist, and other recovery friends.

 

[brgregmack]

It’s been quite a while!!! haha But I would love to update everyone on my life and my recovery!! First off, back in July I left SAA because the Lord wanted to bring lay me low and secretly give me the strength to leave the addictive sexual behaviors behind. He wanted me to learn that He wasn’t going to do anything for me, that it would only end when I decided to turn around. I needed to stop looking for people to tell me what to do, thinking that if I could just find the perfect counselor, sponsor, spiritual director, etc who could see perfectly into my soul that my life would be easy. I need to use and develop the gifts He’s given me and make my own decisions, surrendering to Him and trusting Him, and simply enjoy the mystery of life. I can now see myself outside of the addiction and have stopped introducing myself as a sex addict, by which I was isolating myself from the rest of society and settling for mediocrity. By working the Reclaim program, I know that permanent change is possible, and that “once an addict always an addict” is a lie that keeps all too many from living the abundant life that God wants to give. Since starting the Reclaim program, I now have almost 2 months of purity.

I’m no longer in contact with that woman I was talking to back in May, and after talking with a few other women, I have finally met the woman I’m going to marry She and I have so many of the deep and important things in common, and we’ve reached such a level of intimacy and trust that some couples take years of hard work to get to We simply understand each other so well, and already is such a wonderful and holy partnership We will be consecrating our relationship to Mary on the Feast of the Immaculate Conception We both know for sure that we will be getting married, and love each other so much that we will wait until we have done more work both individually and as a couple God is so good and His plans are absolutely perfect

 

[Irishmom2]

Good for you! You are making great progress, I am happy for you!

 

[Hoosier_Daddy]

It’s been quite a while!!! haha But I would love to update everyone on my life and my recovery!! First off, back in July I left SAA because the Lord wanted to bring lay me low and secretly give me the strength to leave the addictive sexual behaviors behind. He wanted me to learn that He wasn’t going to do anything for me, that it would only end when I decided to turn around. I needed to stop looking for people to tell me what to do, thinking that if I could just find the perfect counselor, sponsor, spiritual director, etc who could see perfectly into my soul that my life would be easy. I need to use and develop the gifts He’s given me and make my own decisions, surrendering to Him and trusting Him, and simply enjoy the mystery of life. I can now see myself outside of the addiction and have stopped introducing myself as a sex addict, by which I was isolating myself from the rest of society and settling for mediocrity. By working the Reclaim program, I know that permanent change is possible, and that “once an addict always an addict” is a lie that keeps all too many from living the abundant life that God wants to give. Since starting the Reclaim program, I now have almost 2 months of purity.

I’m no longer in contact with that woman I was talking to back in May, and after talking with a few other women, I have finally met the woman I’m going to marry She and I have so many of the deep and important things in common, and we’ve reached such a level of intimacy and trust that some couples take years of hard work to get to We simply understand each other so well, and already is such a wonderful and holy partnership We will be consecrating our relationship to Mary on the Feast of the Immaculate Conception We both know for sure that we will be getting married, and love each other so much that we will wait until we have done more work both individually and as a couple God is so good and His plans are absolutely perfect

I hope things continue to improve for you.

 

[phil_at_dayboro]

As One door closes, another door opens,
your not the First and you won’t be the last to stumble your way around,

 

[brgregmack]

Good for you! You are making great progress, I am happy for you!

Yes, I’m the happiest I’ve been in a long time I know that she and I incarnate His love for each other, and having Christ at the center continues to heal us both And it’s also wonderful that I now know what holy sexual attraction looks and feels like, and what the proper order is It’s a deep desire for complete union with an amazing and beautiful woman who I’ve connected with deeply both emotionally and spiritually, and having Christ as the center and source of our love makes chastity so natural Praise God!!!