Annulment question

  • Thread starter Thread starter LMU
  • Start date Start date
Status
Not open for further replies.
dans0622 said:
Hello,

Interesting remark. Could you point to a source or two that supports it?

Dan
Click to expand...
Exodus 22:16
“If a man seduces a virgin who is not pledged to be married and sleeps with her, he must pay the bride-price, and she shall be his wife.”
 
steve93 said:
Exodus 22:16
“If a man seduces a virgin who is not pledged to be married and sleeps with her, he must pay the bride-price, and she shall be his wife.”
Click to expand...
Great. … Do you know of an occasion where this was stated as part of specifically Christian morality?

Dan
 
steve93 said:
You took her out of a bad situation, but yet she cheats on you? Have you ever cheated on her? What do you mean by arguments over sex? Frequency? Forbidden acts?
Click to expand...
That’s not that surprising, really. People aren’t totally rational, especially around sex and relationships. They also tend to reenact the dynamics they experienced in childhood. If she grew up in a chaotic house where her parents had an explosive, contentious relationship, she might unconsciously try to recreate that in adulthood.
steve93 said:
Uh… stated, no. Definitely understood in traditional American circles.
Click to expand...
I don’t think that’s the common understanding today (nor should it be.) Viewing someone as “damaged goods” or “polluted” for having made a mistake is pretty dehumanizing. The vast majority of people in the dating pool, even conservative ones, don’t regard lack of virginity as a dealbreaker.

Anyway, I’m not sure that reading from Exodus is totally on point. It seems to be contemplating a situation in which a man seduces a naive woman (note how it specifies a virgin) with promises of marriage.
 
LMU said:
Thank you, Horton. I feel responsible for all this, as I was the first to stray and I hurt her terribly. But I’ve become much more committed to my faith since she told me and I’ve tried so hard to be a better person. I figured it could take a long time to turn this around, but now that I’ve actually gone through it, it has already been a long time and I don’t think I can see this turning around. I think it would really take a miracle, and I don’t know if I have the faith necessary to wait for it or accept that it won’t come. I do feel defeated and now I’m trying to be realistic. I’ve looked into selling our home, looking at our debts and figuring out what we would be able to pay off with the equity, what alimony entails, how my retirement is impacted, and yes, divorce. I feel like I’m giving up, but I don’t know if I deserve to be happy. And St. Pancake, this is the question I keep rolling around in my head.
Click to expand...
Looking at divorce is reasonable response to the problems in your marriage. The responsibility for the problems is most likely shared between you both. What does your wife want? What is her view on solving the problems?
 
dans0622 said:
Great. … Do you know of an occasion where this was stated as part of specifically Christian morality?

Dan
Click to expand...
If you loved a girlfriend, but fell into sin with her, the right thing to do would be to marry her by any means necessary (ei civil justice of the peace ASAP, no engagement period) to avoid exposing her to humiliation if she became pregnant or having to admit wrongdoing to a future (other) suitor and be rejected.
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Back
Top