Annulment

[pforrester]

I have a question on the philosophy behind the Church’s policy on annulment. I am a convert to the Catholic Church, 5 years ago. A good friend of mine followed me into the Church two years ago. She has always struggled with her marriage. Her three children are in college or beyond. Shortly after entering the Church she counselled with our priest and told me afterwards that the circumstances of her marriage are classic grounds for a declaration of nullity ( I have read two books on the subject and various other essays) She was date raped and manipulated her present husband into marriage by having sex with him and he married her due to guilt (he was and still is a strong Protestant Christian) and she was supposedly psychologically unstable due to the rape etc. so her consent is questionable. She seemed so excited at this news and eager to apply for an “annulment”. I told her she could not do that. The church only investigated marriages that had ended in divorce. She ignored me, sure I was wrong. She recently was propositioned by an attractive man at work. She was tempted but admirably resisted.
But the next time her husband was mean to her, 2 weeks later, she wanted a separation. Less than a month later she met with our priest to file papers for an “annulment”. I told her, again, she could not file unless there had been a divorce. I do not want her to divorce her husband. After meeting with our priest she told me she has met with a lawyer and is going to divorce her husband. When I asked her why she was not giving the separation a chance to see if they could work out her marriage she said “Because the church will not investigate my marriage unless I am divorced first”

So she is divorcing her husband in order to get an annulment! This just can’t be right! Can it? All of our Protestant friends are scandalized!

 

[Br.Rich_SFO]

The Church will not begin an Annulment until (usually) a year after the divorce is final. Why on earth would someone want to seek an Annulment to a Marriage they are still actively involved in?

 

[pforrester]

Br. Rich SFO:

The Church will not begin an Annulment until (usually) a year after the divorce is final. Why on earth would someone want to seek an Annulment to a Marriage they are still actively involved in?

Because both she and her husband believe very strongly that marriage is forever. But, she wants out of the marriage and does not want to violate her belief that divorce is not acceptable. Therefore, she believed that if it was found that their marriage really wasn’t a true marriage in the eyes of God b/c the Church declared it null, it would free her to go through a divorce as a mere radification of how her marriage was viewed by God.

And this brings me to the crux of my question. I know there are good and natural marrriages althogh not sacramental. So I want to know…How Does God view her marriage? or the marriage of friends of ours who IF they ever got divorced would have grounds for an annulment because one was married before so the second marriage is adultery? Or another couple, one was raised Catholic and married a Jewish girl. Now they are both Protestants Christians. (Disparity of Cult)

I understand the whole idea of extending healing and grace to people whose marriages have ended in divorce but I do not understand the philosophical reasons that make it ok to declare a marriage null after a divorce but not seek a divorce in order to have the marriaged declared null. I agree that the latter is wrong. But why, philosophically?

 

[Almeria]

I think they need a divorce for civil reasons. I don’t believe the state recognizes annulments, so the divorce would be to separate them legally.

 

[BLB_Oregon]

Almeria:

I think they need a divorce for civil reasons. I don’t believe the state recognizes annulments, so the divorce would be to separate them legally.

The state wouldn’t recognize a Catholic annulment. It is possible to get a civil annulment, not just a civil divorce.

 

[Christy_Beth]

Yes, I’ve heard of civil annulments. But, I believe, they have to be done fairly early in the marriage. You know, like you went to Las Vegas and got married while totally s*** faced drunk, sobered up and realized that you were wrong. Of course, I’ve been known to be wrong.

 

[otm]

She could seek out a priest who has presented numerous cases to the Tribunal, or perhaps a Canon lawyer, and get an opinion. However, I have never seen the reason why the Tribunal will not hear a case prior to a divorce. Good question. Any Canon lawyers out there?

 

[chimakuni]

I have never heard that you have to wait a year until after your civil divorce is completed. I have two friends who just recently divorced and filed their annulments papers within a week.

As far as why a tribunal could not rule on the validity of a marriage when it was still a marriage…it is because the marriage is still intact and there is no case to show otherwise. The Church recognizes the validity of all marriages unless proven otherwise and in this case, without a divorce, there would be no cause to investigate. The nullity would concern the sacrament of course, but one would be putting the horse before the cart to ask for a sacrament to be nullified so that one could put their case before the civil court. The civil court would not recognize an anulment.

 

[otm]

It is correct that a civil court would not recognize an annullment, but that wouldn’t stop the court from rendering a decision to either annull the marriage civilly, or to grant a divorce. And evidence entered in the Tribunal would be admissable in civil court if it complied with civil evidence rules; that is, it would not be prohibited by the civil court simply because it was entered in another forum. Whether it was relevant is another issue.

As another point, someone can submit their papers to a Tribunal the day the divorce decree is granted. But submitting the paperwork does nopt mean that the Tribunal has to hear the case sooner. If there is a one year rule, it will impact the timing of the hearing, not the filing.