K
kristis524
Guest
Thank you; I really don’t like “wondering” what happened to it, if they got it, or what the status is and I can’t ask them until it is accepted and I have a case number
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E
EvelynEVF
Guest
Has your pastor confirmed that he sent it in? Sad to say, there are stories on these boards about people who discovered their first paperwork in a drawer in the rectory. . .
K
kristis524
Guest
That’s a good question and I have not asked. With over 3,000 parishioners, I could see it slipping by him. I can ask and hope he remembers
K
kristis524
Guest
I actually didn’t even think of that because my advocate and I filled it all out and it just needed the Church seal. I assumed the Parish secretary would do that. I didn’t realize it had to go to Father.
Do they read them?
E
EvelynEVF
Guest
I’m in a small parish, so your mileage may vary. My pastor is automatically the advocate for any petitioner in the parish. I don’t know if your pastor would read it, but I doubt it if he isn’t the advocate. He may have nothing to do with the process at all.
D
dans0622
Guest
Hello,
Yes, if the case is already in process at the Rota, the new procedures will not apply…except to say that if they make a decision after Dec. 8 and it is affirmative, then the case will be completed (even if that were to be the only affirmative sentence).
There are some differences in how testimony is gathered. The way the process is designed, in-person interviews are the way it should be. But…that doesn’t always happen. There is a sort of “American style” = written questionnaires.
Dan
H
Huiou_Theou
Guest
Feelings are neither right nor wrong. They just react to situations and can’t really be controlled; in my case, I get the negative feeling because my priest said the process will be longer for me because I don’t have a fiancee. If it were a matter of me thinking in my mind, I’m doing right – it wouldn’t be so bad; But historically, I’ve been on an emotional roller coaster far too long. My archdiocese has put many reprobate priests including pedophiles, and those who got into fights with the bishop in places where I’ve been forced to live. It’s sort of a mission territory with major poverty and welfare the norm. My marriage broke up with a priest directly disobeying their bishop and screaming at my ex-wife at daily mass, telling my mother in law that my wife could get an annulment even before the divorce; police involvement, etc. Even several years after the breakup, when I attended an annulment class – but before I could learn about filing; the priest teaching the class was suddenly arrested for attempting to “lure” a young lady into his car. eg: luring is a felony in some places in the U.S., and even picking up an underage hitchhiker could be warped into a false accusation.
At least, unlike the previous priests I dealt with, I think the tribunal priest was probably innocent; I mean, at least he broke down in tears when the police arrested him and he finally understood what the charges were and was shocked and in disbelief (he’s not a native English speaker, but a missionary priest) but stress wise, I feel like the devil owns the Energizer bunny around here, and the bunny’s brand is playboy and is following me around like I’m super-glued to it. It’s almost like a prophecy – The priests been awaiting trial for well over a year, now, and is forbidden to be an active priest; but the civil court system keeps pushing his trial date back for lack of evidence. They destroyed his life although he is technically “innocent” until proven guilty, and the civil courts refuse to give him justice. Most of how he is treated is precisely because he’s a Catholic Priest. Normal lay-persons/citizens don’t get messed with that hard. So – the fact of the matter is that I’m in a highly abnormal situation, having to drive over 40 miles to get to a parish which doesn’t have problems that involve me or my history or my ex-wife or priests in trouble with the law; The new priest is being very kind, and is taking me on in addition to his parish to help me go through the process. I’m just very prone to depression after everything I’ve been through, and even innocent remarks can send me into very deep depression.
eg: When I finally went in to file my packet, The priest tried to make small talk with me when the secretary was copying my annulment petition (twice); but when he mentioned that he refused to be a priest in my area for various negative reasons when the archdiocese offered it to him, and also that he spent years placing sex offenders against young boys in a halfway house which “nobody wants”, and then topped it off saying that because I’m not dating that my process is going to be much longer – I think you can understand why I feel down.
What Evelyn is talking about, with a controlling ex-husband, is also the same kind of thing I’m facing. I really just want closure, either having the false or true accusations of parish priests manipulated by my ex-wife in past years laid to rest. I don’t want my ex wife try and seduce me again vis. 1Corinthans 7:5 or the opposite, put me on a guilt trip by claiming we have a null marriage and claim that my sexuality is a sin at her whim. She alternates between both positions… and I already have a daughter from one instance after we were separated; I need to stay away from my ex, and I want to know DEFINITIVELY whether I will ever have a duty to her again or not. She isn’t physically abusive, but I think the odds of her lying to the tribunal in order to get revenge are high.
I don’t see that any of the changes the Pope is making to the process are going to affect what goes on with me at this time. I read them, and as far as I can see they don’t apply to my case.
You have my prayers that the changes Francis is implementing aid you in getting justice in a reasonable amount of time. But, I don’t see much reason to hope at this time for myself, other than to maintain a positive attitude in spite of overwhelming evidence to the contrary. St. Joan of arc, pray for us.
H
Huiou_Theou
Guest
You’re still struggling with the injustice of a very long wait, I see. I’ve learned the hard way that some things simply can’t be figured out or solved, because they aren’t logical in the first place. Well, know that you are still in my prayers, as the years continue to go by. I am at least a witness that you have been at this a while…
C
Convert1
Guest
I have read that too. I’m just scared to get my hopes up. I do pray. A lot.
I was told going through annulment in New York was worse. The questionnaire is something like 14 pages and 150 questions. That’s even before you complete the written essay petition. That’s a lot. I guess I had the psychological testing due to abuse. I don’t know, the actual process was never really explained very clearly. I just went with whatever was asked of me. I still can’t get over four years for you EVF. That’s just insane.
C
Convert1
Guest
I submitted my application and written petition the end of September, and I got acceptance of the case about six weeks later. You can call the Tribunal directly and make sure they received it. I learned quickly that I needed to stay on top of things myself. The Tribunals often are short staffed and my Priest was always so busy.That’s a good question and I have not asked. With over 3,000 parishioners, I could see it slipping by him. I can ask and hope he remembers
C
Convert1
Guest
So sad. I will keep you in my prayers this evening.Feelings are neither right nor wrong. They just react to situations and can’t really be controlled; in my case, I get the negative feeling because my priest said the process will be longer for me because I don’t have a fiancee. If it were a matter of me thinking in my mind, I’m doing right – it wouldn’t be so bad; But historically, I’ve been on an emotional roller coaster far too long. My archdiocese has put many reprobate priests including pedophiles, and those who got into fights with the bishop in places where I’ve been forced to live. It’s sort of a mission territory with major poverty and welfare the norm. My marriage broke up with a priest directly disobeying their bishop and screaming at my ex-wife at daily mass, telling my mother in law that my wife could get an annulment even before the divorce; police involvement, etc. Even several years after the breakup, when I attended an annulment class – but before I could learn about filing; the priest teaching the class was suddenly arrested for attempting to “lure” a young lady into his car. eg: luring is a felony in some places in the U.S., and even picking up an underage hitchhiker could be warped into a false accusation.
At least, unlike the previous priests I dealt with, I think the tribunal priest was probably innocent; I mean, at least he broke down in tears when the police arrested him and he finally understood what the charges were and was shocked and in disbelief (he’s not a native English speaker, but a missionary priest) but stress wise, I feel like the devil owns the Energizer bunny around here, and the bunny’s brand is playboy and is following me around like I’m super-glued to it. It’s almost like a prophecy – The priests been awaiting trial for well over a year, now, and is forbidden to be an active priest; but the civil court system keeps pushing his trial date back for lack of evidence. They destroyed his life although he is technically “innocent” until proven guilty, and the civil courts refuse to give him justice. Most of how he is treated is precisely because he’s a Catholic Priest. Normal lay-persons/citizens don’t get messed with that hard. So – the fact of the matter is that I’m in a highly abnormal situation, having to drive over 40 miles to get to a parish which doesn’t have problems that involve me or my history or my ex-wife or priests in trouble with the law; The new priest is being very kind, and is taking me on in addition to his parish to help me go through the process. I’m just very prone to depression after everything I’ve been through, and even innocent remarks can send me into very deep depression.
eg: When I finally went in to file my packet, The priest tried to make small talk with me when the secretary was copying my annulment petition (twice); but when he mentioned that he refused to be a priest in my area for various negative reasons when the archdiocese offered it to him, and also that he spent years placing sex offenders against young boys in a halfway house which “nobody wants”, and then topped it off saying that because I’m not dating that my process is going to be much longer – I think you can understand why I feel down.
What Evelyn is talking about, with a controlling ex-husband, is also the same kind of thing I’m facing. I really just want closure, either having the false or true accusations of parish priests manipulated by my ex-wife in past years laid to rest. I don’t want my ex wife try and seduce me again vis. 1Corinthans 7:5 or the opposite, put me on a guilt trip by claiming we have a null marriage and claim that my sexuality is a sin at her whim. She alternates between both positions… and I already have a daughter from one instance after we were separated; I need to stay away from my ex, and I want to know DEFINITIVELY whether I will ever have a duty to her again or not. She isn’t physically abusive, but I think the odds of her lying to the tribunal in order to get revenge are high.
I don’t see that any of the changes the Pope is making to the process are going to affect what goes on with me at this time. I read them, and as far as I can see they don’t apply to my case.
You have my prayers that the changes Francis is implementing aid you in getting justice in a reasonable amount of time. But, I don’t see much reason to hope at this time for myself, other than to maintain a positive attitude in spite of overwhelming evidence to the contrary. St. Joan of arc, pray for us.
A
Augustine
Guest
E
EvelynEVF
Guest
Five and a half years now, actually. Insane is a good description.
I think my questionnaire had 84 questions. The witness questionnaires were much shorter, and everything specified that the questions were just guideposts. I appreciate that my diocese uses them, because I would be afraid that the value of the interview would depend too much on the skill of the interviewer.
M
MJJean
Guest
I don’t remember how many questions the initial questionnaire had, but it ended up being 19 pages, typed, when I finished. Then I got a short 12 section questionnaire along with an 8 section questionnaire in the mail after my case was accepted.
My Witnesses either got the 12 or 8 section questionnaire, except two. My “step father” (he and mom were together 18 years, had 3 kids, but never married) and my close friend of more than 20 years got both the 12 and 8 section questionnaire.
I agree about written questionnaires. A questionnaire can be revised until it’s just right for it’s purpose and it is impartial. An in person interview can be skewed simply because people are often more comfortable being brutally honest in writing and try to sanitize events when speaking in person.
O
orlh
Guest
Hi Dan, what happens if a case is currently pending the second tribunal’s decision and December 8th comes? No need to wait, and the 1st tribunal will send the final letter or are they stuck in some limbo state? I am guessing that most likely the 2nd tribunal will ensure to clear their “queue” before that date comes. Thank you.
N
Nic1099
Guest
Hi!
I would like to say that my husband and I were married in our local church over a month ago and are extremely happy. As you know, throughout the annulment process, I had to deal with a very bitter ex partner who objected to the decree of nullity. Even after the second conforming decision, he was still threatening to ‘appeal’ to Rome. Despite all the threats, I never heard anything from our tribunal here, let alone Rome. I thank God for that.
I see that many of you are still navigating through stormy waters but trust in the Lord and the truth will come out.
I will continue to keep you all in my prayers.
Nic
I would like to say that my husband and I were married in our local church over a month ago and are extremely happy. As you know, throughout the annulment process, I had to deal with a very bitter ex partner who objected to the decree of nullity. Even after the second conforming decision, he was still threatening to ‘appeal’ to Rome. Despite all the threats, I never heard anything from our tribunal here, let alone Rome. I thank God for that.
I see that many of you are still navigating through stormy waters but trust in the Lord and the truth will come out.
I will continue to keep you all in my prayers.
Nic
H
His_helpmeet
Guest
My understanding (and Dan, please correct me if I’m in error here) is that although you can APPEAL to the Rota, the chances that the Rota will actually HEAR your cases is pretty low. I think they tend to be more likely to hear a case if there was a conflict between the initial two decisions, or possibly if there was extremely compelling evidence, but I think they don’t actually hear most cases that are appealed to them.
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Huiou_Theou
Guest
:heaven: Thank you. :hug1:
D
dans0622
Guest
Hello,
If the first instance court renders an “affirmative” decision before December 8, the case **must **go to the second instance court and go through the **entire **process there. The December 8 date doesn’t mean anything for cases pending before second instance tribunals.
So, second instance courts don’t have any reason (based on the new procedure) to make sure everything is completed by December 8…I’m all for getting the work done as quickly as possible, though.
Dan
D
dans0622
Guest
That’s interesting. I would tend to think the opposite. Looking at how it works in practice, I’m not sure if there is any “rule of thumb” as far as people being more forthcoming in one setting vs. the other.
Dan
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