Another confusion point

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jesusfreak6463

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Last time I went to confession, I confessed porn, lust, and masterbation, yet when I went on to say that I had recieved Communion in state of mortal sin, the preist stoped me and asked me, what mortal sin? And when I said porn and masterbation, he said that it was not a mortal sin because it is hard to commit a true mortal sin, because a true mortal sin has to be pre-meditated.

Can someone please clear this up for me? Thanks and God bless!!
 
Giving the Priest the benefit of the doubt…

Let’s say that it is difficult to commit a mortal sin. That doesn’t mean that it is impossible to do so, and it doesn’t mean that you weren’t in that condition.

Perhaps the Priest suspected a tendency toward scrupulosity, and without explaining all that to you, was trying to ease your conscience.

We can agree that the items you mentioned are grave matter. That still leaves two other criteria, and perhaps the priest discerned that you fell short on one or the other.

So long as the priest gave absolution, just let it go there, and (of course) try to avoid these sins in the future.

Regards,
Joe
 
I can share the OPs experience. I have confessed the big M to 5 different priests now, and none have ever chastised me or given me any dire warnings…one says for it to be mortal, it has to take over and be the center of one’s life and replace God’s place, another says most times these are compulsions that people have that they act on due to societal pressures and other things; that once you are older, it gets much easier to stay away from this act. The other 3 never even counseled me on it at all; they mentioned my other failings and how to get better at them.

None gave me advice to just do it because you feel like it, but they all told me not to be to hard on myself about it, and just to keep up the struggle. But never to take it too lightly and dismiss it out of hand.

I assume these priests are validly ordained and have had training in this area. 5 priests. The ‘internet theologists’ are much much more harsh in judgement than any priest ever has been to myself.

One must be too careful not to fall into ‘sola internetua’ when evaluating their concience and moral responsibility.

NOTE: I am not advocating anyone to sin impurely! My life situation may be vastly different from yours!
 
These things that you have confessed are grave, and it is very unwise for these priests to treat it so lightly. The Catechism teaches that it is a grave matter, meaning that if you do it willingly with this knowledge, it is a mortal sin. I think a lax attitude over this problem has taken hold in our Church, and some priests are leading their faithful down dangerous paths.
 
UndertheRadar said:
These things that you have confessed are grave, and it is very unwise for these priests to treat it so lightly. The Catechism teaches that it is a grave matter, meaning that if you do it willingly with this knowledge, it is a mortal sin. I think a lax attitude over this problem has taken hold in our Church, and some priests are leading their faithful down dangerous paths.
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Based on what I’ve seen here an the experiences that people have shared, I agree completely.
 
Say grave sin if it makes him happy, but he is wrong, Lust is a capital sin, and always mortal, premeditated is not a requirement- Knowledge , assent, gravity of matter are- the priest was either misheard, or theologically wrong.

scripturelink.googlepages.com/search

www.newadvent.org/summa/3154.htm
www.newadvent.org/summa/3154.htm
ewtn.com/library/papaldoc/jp2tb25.htm

Even delectuous kissing is forbidden as mortal sin by Aquinas outside of marriage- the Priest, was wrong-

“Reply to Objection 2. Although kisses and touches do not by their very nature hinder the good of the human offspring, they proceed from lust, which is the source of this hindrance: and on this account they are mortally sinful.”

newadvent.org/summa/3154.htm#article4
see also

forums.catholic-questions.org/showthread.php?t=247701

specifically
forums.catholic-questions.org/showpost.php?p=3948814&postcount=137

If there are things affecting the will- to be able to choose, or the good judgment, these may be applicable in cases, but this is likely not the case, so I’d confess it still, and ask the priest to accept that you feel you did sin, and (kindly) ask to also have it factored in, since when can he say for you if these factors were absent?
 
“because a true mortal sin has to be pre-meditated.”

Ignore the legal sense of “premeditated.” You can premeditate a mortal sin in a fraction of a second, by thinking “I know it’s grave matter but, who cares, I’m going to do it anyway.”

“I know it’s grave matter, but I can’t help it” is somewhat different. It still has an aspect of premeditation, and I think (personal opinion) that you have a chance to stop yourself if you hear yourself thinking that.

Catching yourself doing it and stopping (whatever “it” is) or realizing after you’ve done it, that, “oh, no, I did it again” would seem to me to show that you did not give full and free consent of the will.

I’m having a similar struggle with gluttony. :o

Ruthie
 
I’m fairly new to this posting so bare with me.

You have to remember the 3 things that make the sin mortal.

And I just wanted to point out that you have told us your confession. If it was Hypothetical it would be a different story.
But you chose to tell us anyway. I was taught that that is a sin in itself. If I’m wrong please someone let me know.
 
stveronica3 said:
I’m fairly new to this posting so bare with me.

You have to remember the 3 things that make the sin mortal.

And I just wanted to point out that you have told us your confession. If it was Hypothetical it would be a different story.
But you chose to tell us anyway. I was taught that that is a sin in itself. If I’m wrong please someone let me know.
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One is allowed to admit their sins to others, and such an action is a form of humility. You may have been thinking of a priest who, bound by his vows, cannot tell the sins of a person who has gone to confession.
 
Lol. Now I’m confused. I was told that you are not to let anyone know what went on in the confessional. This was taught by Priests I went to before and catechism classes.
 
stveronica3 said:
Lol. Now I’m confused. I was told that you are not to let anyone know what went on in the confessional. This was taught by Priests I went to before and catechism classes.
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No, you are free to speak about whatever you choose concerning your confession to anyone. Only the confessor (priest or bishop) is bound by the sacramental seal in which case he can tell no one of anyone’s confession under the penalty of excommunication…teachccd
 
jesusfreak6463 said:
Last time I went to confession, I confessed porn, lust, and masterbation, yet when I went on to say that I had recieved Communion in state of mortal sin, the preist stoped me and asked me, what mortal sin? And when I said porn and masterbation, he said that it was not a mortal sin because it is hard to commit a true mortal sin, because a true mortal sin has to be pre-meditated.

Can someone please clear this up for me? Thanks and God bless!!
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I’m sure that by pre-meditated your priest meant that you had time to give full consent which is one of the three requirements for a sin ot be mortal. Perhaps he noted a compulsion which would lessen your culpablility due to an addictive hindered condition. If you really need someone to clear this up for you (and I believe that you do) go back to the priest and ask him. Tell him that the Catechism of the Catholic Church describes those three sinful actions as grave offenses. Ask him why in your case he does not consider committing these grave acts a mortal sin. Then you will have your clarification. We cannot speak for a priest who heard your confession in private; only he can…God Bless…teachccd
 
Remember, sin is not always a thing we can determine, rather always confess, often the least orthodox people are priests or bishops, and the least obedient too. God promised a church infallible, but not a priesthood infallible- often people are shredded to bits by the uncaring attitude of the priest, as sometimes doctors send a sick person home, with laughter and jeers. DOn’t let his words stop you. P.s. Grave sin or mortal sin, no difference, grave sin, grave matter- there’s difference, laxness in the priesthood, and carelessness, and utter apathy by some are a major issue in the church, and partly why we are oft in the media… not to absolve those with agendas.:cool:
 
jesusfreak6463 said:
Last time I went to confession, I confessed porn, lust, and masterbation, yet when I went on to say that I had recieved Communion in state of mortal sin, the preist stoped me and asked me, what mortal sin? And when I said porn and masterbation, he said that it was not a mortal sin because it is hard to commit a true mortal sin, because a true mortal sin has to be pre-meditated.

Can someone please clear this up for me? Thanks and God bless!!
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as it has been said old habits die hard…perhaps this is were your confessor was coming from…if you committed these acts out of habit then perhaps your cuppablity is lessened…but that doesn’t say you didn’t commit the acts…lets say you were being tempted with viewing porn,after a battle you give in, after viewing the porn you start to feel lusty you do battle with this for while then give in,now you have given in to feeling lustful and are still viewing the porn you may be able to hold off on the M for a while but you while fall to that too,because of the first falls…now in this tale is there full consent of the person to do these things?
 
fbl9 said:
as it has been said old habits die hard…perhaps this is were your confessor was coming from…if you committed these acts out of habit then perhaps your cuppablity is lessened…but that doesn’t say you didn’t commit the acts…lets say you were being tempted with viewing porn,after a battle you give in, after viewing the porn you start to feel lusty you do battle with this for while then give in,now you have given in to feeling lustful and are still viewing the porn you may be able to hold off on the M for a while but you while fall to that too,because of the first falls…now in this tale is there full consent of the person to do these things?
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Sounds like a reluctant, or partial consent to me, rather than full. Full consent is a whole-hearted embracing of the action you are performing that you know is wrong. Like, thinking at 8AM ‘I can’t wait till I get home from work. I’m going to put on some porn, get drunk, do the deed several times, etc…’ That would be an example of Full Consent. Reluctant or partial consent would be given after a battle. Like resisting way more times than giving in. That shows that the agent does not embrace what he/she is doing, but gives in to it after a battle due to weakness, habit, compulsion, etc.
 
UndertheRadar said:
These things that you have confessed are grave, and it is very unwise for these priests to treat it so lightly. The Catechism teaches that it is a grave matter, meaning that if you do it willingly with this knowledge, it is a mortal sin. I think a lax attitude over this problem has taken hold in our Church, and some priests are leading their faithful down dangerous paths.
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That may very well be. 🤷
ForwardProgress said:
Sounds like a reluctant, or partial consent to me, rather than full. Full consent is a whole-hearted embracing of the action you are performing that you know is wrong. Like, thinking at 8AM ‘I can’t wait till I get home from work. I’m going to put on some porn, get drunk, do the deed several times, etc…’ That would be an example of Full Consent. Reluctant or partial consent would be given after a battle. Like resisting way more times than giving in. That shows that the agent does not embrace what he/she is doing, but gives in to it after a battle due to weakness, habit, compulsion, etc.
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Exactly. Porn addiction is really no different than alchohol or drug addition.
 
Despite the judgement of the priest that you had not sinned mortally these three things porn, lust, and masturbation or self-abuse are grave matter. If not mortal sins in your case for some reason, they would be at least venial and well worth confessing if you wish to eventually break a habit or obsession.

If you have a problem with scrupulosity and this priest is your regular confessor he might say something like you said he did, but from your post this did not seem to be the case. It seemed that he was one of those priests who have been misled into believing that these things are not grave matter.

You did your best to confess, received absolution, and the sins were forgiven. No doubt about that. I think unless you are going to switch priests, you need to have a chat with him as to exactly why he told you what he did. If he is one of those misled, you can expect an arguement. Hold your ground, thank him, and walk away.
 
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