Another First Penance question

[longing4Jesus]

I am a convert so I had my First Penance as an adult, a few days before my convalidation/ first Holy Communion/ Confirmation. My second-grade son will have his First Penance in a few weeks, and First Holy Communion in May.

Not being raised in the faith, I’m not sure what is traditional. Is it customary to give some sort of gift to mark this significant milestone, in the same way that people do for First Holy Communion? I did get him a nice book on First Penance which includes a great children’s examination of conscience, which I plan to give him the Sunday before. Is that appropriate? Did any of you who are cradle Catholics get anything at your First Penance which is still treasured and meaningful to you today?

Thank you.

 

[domandcarols]

I don’t actually remember getting anything on my first confession… Just for my first Holy Communion.
I think the book is enough. You could get him a holy card with the Act of Contrition on it.

 

[Safia]

I don’t actually remember getting anything on my first confession… Just for my first Holy Communion.
I think the book is enough. You could get him a holy card with the Act of Contrition on it.

Agreed. I didn’t receive anything for my first Penance, though the week before my mom and I carefully went through the process, and she helped pose questions for my examination of conscience, and urged me to make a list if I needed to.

I only received gifts (v. small) for the First Communion, post-Mass.

 

[DexUK]

I think your gift of the book on confession is a great idea. It’s well over three decades now since my first confession, so I can’t remember if I got given anything or not, but I’d say you’ve done exactly the right thing as it is. In this case it seems that there’s no substitute for a well informed instinct!

 

[Kennywood]

FWIW:

Our pastor suggested doing something special afterwards, like stopping for an ice cream. He wanted us to convey to the children that it was not an ordinary thing, and that it brings happiness and good feelings to receive this sacrament.

My friend and I took our daughters out for tea afterward. Our son? Ice cream.

 

[Mrs_Sally]

Gifts and parties are not customary for First Penance. The book you describe sounds like an excellent idea though.

Usually First Panance and First Holy Communion are close enough in time that two parties/ two sets of gifts are not necessary. First penance is also not as public of a milestone bacause you can’t really talk about how you felt, what you did, what the priest said, etc. Also no pictures.

So, the book, yes. Ice cream, maybe. A few words about the grace in his soul and how he is now clean from the inside out, definately.

 

[longing4Jesus]

Thanks all! I appreciate the feedback. I know he is looking forward to it, because he goes with me every other week and waits in the pew and reads (usually lives of the saints or a Children’s Bible) while I am in there. And when I am done he is FULL of questions about what it is like.

 

[Richard320]

I’m a Cradle Catholic, and I didn’t get anything for my first Confession. I did get my own small Crucifix and a wooden plaque with a brass plate on it that said “Remembrance of my First Holy Communion.” I still have them both.

A better thing would be if the whole family went to the Penance Service (They still do those for the Communion class, don’t they?) and took their turn going to Confession, so he sees it’s important to go. But it seems like you’ve already got that covered. Good job, by the way! I applaud your setting the example.

The big event is First Communion, first Confession is just the prelude. Make a bigger deal out of the First Communion,

 

[puzzleannie]

I am Not being raised in the faith, I’m not sure what is traditional. Is it customary to give some sort of gift to mark this significant milestone, in the same way that people do for First Holy Communion? I did get him a nice book on First Penance which includes a great children’s examination of conscience, which I plan to give him the Sunday before. .

not really since it is essentialy a more private occasion, but your selection is ideal, but I would get it sooner and use it to help him prepare.

When they participate in the communal first penance celebration we (the parish) give them a small crucifix as a suitable memento.

a party is out of place, but if the child has been nervous about it a stop for ice cream afterward would not be a bad idea.

First confession is not a mere prelude to first communion, it is an essential part of his faith formation and preparation for the sacrament. In this diocese it is strongly encouraged to celebrate first confession at least 6 months before 1st communion, in part to counteract the misconception that confession is mandatory before each and every reception of communion.