Another "not knowing my vocation" thread

[TarkanAttila]

While I would love to become a priest (and eventually a bishop, Lord willing), I also feel a pull to become a husband and parent. We are desperately in need of both well-instructed priests and well-raised children as a society.

But I feel like I am between a rock and a hard place, the problem being the fact that I do not have a job. I cannot even get into the lowest levels of employment and start earning a wage. I don’t have experience for management jobs. And I appear to be too educated (I am in college) for a typical “burger-flipping” or “waiter” sort of job. (That plus the fact that I rarely fill out applications; that could possibly be holding me back, too.)

Therefore, I cannot afford to learn at a seminary. And I also cannot afford to go out on dates. (Unless Mass and meeting at her house would count.)

Also, I would be somewhat embarrassed if she were paying for everything. I mean, as long as I go to college, I get some grant money ($400-$1000 a quarter, depending on the classes). And I can pay for some things.

But I just don’t feel like I could afford either to be a seminarian (although I long to learn more theology), or a decent date for a lovely, Catholic, young lady.

Advice?

Just fill out applications like crazy and keep my contacts up-to-date? Throw caution to the wind and go out searching for Miss Right? Beg the Diocese to let me into the seminary in exchange for my efforts and labour? Or some combination of these (keeping fully in mind that Eastern Catholic priests can marry before taking their vows)?

P.S: Some guys in the Knights of Columbus have also been nagging me to join for the past two months. I should, shouldn’t I?

 

[ATeutonicKnight]

While I would love to become a priest (and eventually a bishop, Lord willing), I also feel a pull to become a husband and parent. We are desperately in need of both well-instructed priests and well-raised children as a society.

But I feel like I am between a rock and a hard place, the problem being the fact that I do not have a job. I cannot even get into the lowest levels of employment and start earning a wage. I don’t have experience for management jobs. And I appear to be too educated (I am in college) for a typical “burger-flipping” or “waiter” sort of job. (That plus the fact that I rarely fill out applications; that could possibly be holding me back, too.)

Therefore, I cannot afford to learn at a seminary. And I also cannot afford to go out on dates. (Unless Mass and meeting at her house would count.)

Also, I would be somewhat embarrassed if she were paying for everything. I mean, as long as I go to college, I get some grant money ($400-$1000 a quarter, depending on the classes). And I can pay for some things.

But I just don’t feel like I could afford either to be a seminarian (although I long to learn more theology), or a decent date for a lovely, Catholic, young lady.

Advice?

Just fill out applications like crazy and keep my contacts up-to-date? Throw caution to the wind and go out searching for Miss Right? Beg the Diocese to let me into the seminary in exchange for my efforts and labour? Or some combination of these (keeping fully in mind that Eastern Catholic priests can marry before taking their vows)?

P.S: Some guys in the Knights of Columbus have also been nagging me to join for the past two months. I should, shouldn’t I?

Well, first know that unless you have a need to be a father and a husband, Seminaries don’t want you. You need to want both, because otherwise you won’t be a good spiritual father or good spouse of the Church.

Second, know that Seminaries are paid in full by the Diocese if you simply contact it. Just ask where to go to, talk to the person they tell you to, ask if they pay for Seminary (In 90% of cases they do), and contact the Seminary. The people in charge of the Seminary will then talk with you, look extensively at your background and upbringing, make you do a test, and hopefully, they will accept you.

 

[Lamentation]

Well, first know that unless you have a need to be a father and a husband, Seminaries don’t want you. You need to want both, because otherwise you won’t be a good spiritual father or good spouse of the Church.

Second, know that Seminaries are paid in full by the Diocese if you simply contact it. Just ask where to go to, talk to the person they tell you to, ask if they pay for Seminary (In 90% of cases they do), and contact the Seminary. The people in charge of the Seminary will then talk with you, look extensively at your background and upbringing, make you do a test, and hopefully, they will accept you.

Religious orders will most often pay for seminary. Diocesan might not: in the Diocese of Buffalo the best you can get financially is a program where the seminary assumes 1/3rd, a sponsoring parish (you have to find one) assumes 1/3, and then you cover the remaining 1/3rd of the total cost.

 

[ATeutonicKnight]

Religious orders will most often pay for seminary. Diocesan might not: in the Diocese of Buffalo the best you can get financially is a program where the seminary assumes 1/3rd, a sponsoring parish (you have to find one) assumes 1/3, and then you cover the remaining 1/3rd of the total cost.

Ah. Well, that’s much different than my diocese and the neighboring diocese then. They pay everything in full, unless you decide to go to college for four years instead of going to Seminary for eight.

And yes, Religious Orders usually pay for it. Sometimes they are small and cannot afford it, in which I don’t know what they would do, but for the more established ones (C.F.R., O.F.M., O.F.M. Capuchin, Dominicans, etc.) are able to pay for it, and sometimes even have their own Seminary, so it doesn’t cost the Order a dime.

 

[TiggerS]

Well, first know that unless you have a need to be a father and a husband, Seminaries don’t want you. You need to want both, because otherwise you won’t be a good spiritual father or good spouse of the Church.

I find this a bit strange although I dont know anything really about a vocation to the diocesan priesthood. Does this mean that if one wants to love and serve Christ and His Church as a diocesan priest, it is not good enough. That one must have some sort of desire to be a father and husband per se (as in the marital state) in order to be accepted into a seminary?

 

[TarkanAttila]

I find this a bit strange although I dont know anything really about a vocation to the diocesan priesthood. Does this mean that if one wants to love and serve Christ and His Church as a diocesan priest, it is not good enough. That one must have some sort of desire to be a father and husband per se (as in the marital state) in order to be accepted into a seminary?

I think what is meant is that the vocation to the priesthood and marriage are much alike, or meant to be. The priest and the father defend their brides and children, and nourish their children with moral instruction and a righteous example. A good diocesan priest and a good servant IS a good parent and husband. But his bride and his offspring are both correspondingly larger.

 

[TarkanAttila]

Not a word about dating or marriage?

Did I forget to mention that I’ve never had a date before? I do find even the most ordinary of female bodies to be beautiful, as God intended them to be. And some of them are even nice when I try to talk to them.

 

[PerfectTiming]

Not a word about dating or marriage?

Did I forget to mention that I’ve never had a date before? I do find even the most ordinary of female bodies to be beautiful, as God intended them to be. And some of them are even nice when I try to talk to them.

I think you are concerning yourself almost too much with ‘should I be this or that?’ and looking too much at the practical aspects. The question you need to ask yourself is ‘what is God calling me to do? What does He want for my life?’ Entrust yourself to God and He will show you the right path. It sounds somewhat obvious but when you find your calling, you know it. No matter the doubts, there is a part of your soul that will just know what God is calling you to do. When you know your call it doesn’t matter about anything else. I know I am called to be a nun, I know it in my deepest soul. I have never dated but that doesn’t matter because I have found my true calling, the place that God has prepared for me. And that is a truly wonderful, joyous thing.

Concern yourself first with discovering God’s will for you. Once you know that and you accept His call, He will make the path for you. You are in my prayers.

 

[Lamentation]

I find this a bit strange although I dont know anything really about a vocation to the diocesan priesthood. Does this mean that if one wants to love and serve Christ and His Church as a diocesan priest, it is not good enough. That one must have some sort of desire to be a father and husband per se (as in the marital state) in order to be accepted into a seminary?

A priest with the Congregation of the Mission (Vincentian) had said something to the same effect to me as well about wanting, well, normal people who’d like to have families and the such.