Anti-Catholic comments at family gatherings

  • Thread starter Thread starter Annie
  • Start date Start date
Status
Not open for further replies.
A

Annie

Guest
My family has pretty much left the Church and some of them feel the need to spout anti-Catholic comments around me.

Is it ok not to turn a family gathering into a huge row by ignoring those comments?

A couple of family members are not so against the Church and I can have good conversations with them, but some are more interested in being superior sophisticated beings.
 
You could simply say ‘I don’t agree with the accusations you are making towards my spiritual home, and think they’re untrue/offensive/etc. Please don’t make them.’
If they continue after that, you can either argue/refute them, or just accept the annoyance as a small cross to carry.
 
“I don’t wish to discuss this. Please stop asking.”

If they demand to know why you won’t talk about it;

'I don’t think we’ll ever agree, and the arguments are unpleasant. Please don’t insist that I keep arguing with you."

Repeat as necessary. Remember you aren’t obliged to justify refusing to argue. You don’t have to make them admit you have the right to refuse.
 
I suspect some of them think the occasion is not spoiled by these discussions but enhanced. 😦
 
Irishmom2 said:
"Let’s not spoil the occasion by discussing something we will never agree on. "
Click to expand...
This. And if you think people are doing it to get a rise out of you, all the better to brush them off and change the subject.
 
I look forward to them. As Catholics we all should. Of course, if you don’t know your Faith then it is best to retreat but otherwise we should follow Jesus’ commandment to go and spread His teachings. I have found that if you do know your Catholic Faith it ends up that the attacker is the one who wants to end the discussion lol.
 
Annie said:
My family has pretty much left the Church and some of them feel the need to spout anti-Catholic comments around me.

Is it ok not to turn a family gathering into a huge row by ignoring those comments?

A couple of family members are not so against the Church and I can have good conversations with them, but some are more interested in being superior sophisticated beings.
Click to expand...
Matthew 10
11 Whatever town or village you enter, look for a worthy person in it, and stay there until you leave. 12 As you enter a house, wish it peace. 13 If the house is worthy, let your peace come upon it; if not, let your peace return to you.[a] 14 Whoever will not receive you or listen to your words—go outside that house or town and shake the dust from your feet. 15 Amen, I say to you, it will be more tolerable for the land of Sodom and Gomorrah on the day of judgment than for that town.

16 “Behold, I am sending you like sheep in the midst of wolves; so be shrewd as serpents and simple as doves. 17 [c]But beware of people, for they will hand you over to courts and scourge you in their synagogues, 18 and you will be led before governors and kings for my sake as a witness before them and the pagans. 19 When they hand you over, do not worry about how you are to speak or what you are to say. You will be given at that moment what you are to say. 20 For it will not be you who speak but the Spirit of your Father speaking through you. 21 [d]Brother will hand over brother to death, and the father his child; children will rise up against parents and have them put to death. 22 You will be hated by all because of my name, but whoever endures to the end[e] will be saved. 23 When they persecute you in one town, flee to another.

34 “Do not think that I have come to bring peace upon the earth. I have come to bring not peace but the sword. 35 For I have come to set
a man ‘against his father,
a daughter against her mother,
and a daughter-in-law against her mother-in-law;
Click to expand...
Click to expand...
 
Yes, I already had an initial brush, in which I told them I didn’t want to discuss it . And ended up saying I also didn’t want to argue about not discussing it!
 
Good ploy–redirection (why don’t they have the nice evil smile emoticon anymore?)
 
This is the really hard part for me, not caring. I guess that is what the verses @Vico posted are really getting at: hatred is what one who “didn’t care” would be accused of.
 
And with rational people I do.

Here, first, there are way more of them than there are of me, and second, they don’t listen to what I say because they know better than I do. After all, I am just one of those medieval, superstitious Catholics!

ETA: not all of them are like this, just the loudest ones.
 
Last edited:
Yes, I think it’s ok to not turn a family gathering into a huge row by ignoring them. I mean you have at times said your piece I assume from that comment and that you say they have left the church. So it is clear to me that they are merely trying to bait you. Jesus said we would be persecuted for his sake, it appears to me this is one of them. Even Jesus knew when to stop speaking, he said very little at his own trial when he could have started defending himself and the notion of him being a king not of this world etc. and not being here to take over from Herod or to kick Rome out but it had been said, the concept of flogging a dead horse comes to mind, as does Solomon’s wisdom song…there is a time for everything. In my opinion and it seems others say differently, there is a time for speaking and a time for letting it pass by. If you rise to the bait each time, they will simply again for amusement. I have a similar issue with some other disagreeable behaviour my family do and they know I dont like it so I give a small look of distain and ignore it, if the talk becomes too much, I leave the room, til it’s over. I suggest you do the same. You can always say some Hail Mary’s for them while you wait and practice the virtue of forgiveness and forbearance. Hopefully they will get bored or learn some virtues themselves
 
Last edited:
Annie said:
Is it ok not to turn a family gathering into a huge row by ignoring those comments?
Click to expand...
Sure. Just say “sorry you feel that way.” Repeat as necessary. Once they see you won’t give them an argument, trying to bait you won’t be fun anymore.
 
Happy CAF anniversary, @Angel12! 🍰
Annie said:
. I guess that is what the verses @Vico posted are really getting at: hatred is what one who “didn’t care” would be accused of.
Click to expand...
I think there’s a big difference between not caring and recognising when something is a lost cause. You know they aren’t interested in what you say and just want to aggravate you, so there’s no need to continue that conversation.
 
Last edited:
Status
Not open for further replies.
Back
Top