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TheLittleLady
Guest
Take it one day at a time. Be present for her now. Lay down your life for her.
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hoping4more
Guest
She has been Catholic since she was 12. Found out about the sex abuse scandels and decided she did not want to go to Mass, believes by attending that I or anyone is support the church’s decision to move priest around and it has institutional flaws. Obviously, I do not see it that way. Basically, she did a 180 degree turn from when we got married to 1 1/2 years later.
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Irishmom2
Guest
But going to mass, and receiving the body and blood of Our Lord, Jesus Christ is what the Catholic church is about. As unfortunate as the scandals were, they are not the essence of Catholicism.
To disregard God in the way that your wife is doing is dangerous and irresponsible. Explain to her that you want your children and perhaps her as well someday, to live your lives within all that the True Catholic faith believes, not what a bunch of flawed humans did. Tell her not to throw away her faith over the priests involved.
Will she be able to look in God’s eyes and tell him she kept her children away because of flawed sinners? We are all sinners of one kind or another.
Perhaps a priest can come visit her sometime, just to talk, just to hear her side of the story and he will be able to suggest something for your family.
To disregard God in the way that your wife is doing is dangerous and irresponsible. Explain to her that you want your children and perhaps her as well someday, to live your lives within all that the True Catholic faith believes, not what a bunch of flawed humans did. Tell her not to throw away her faith over the priests involved.
Will she be able to look in God’s eyes and tell him she kept her children away because of flawed sinners? We are all sinners of one kind or another.
Perhaps a priest can come visit her sometime, just to talk, just to hear her side of the story and he will be able to suggest something for your family.
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hoping4more
Guest
yeah, it is hard to talk about it without us getting into a bad fight.
She still believes in the idea of God, and Jesus Christ, but is skeptical of parts of the Bible, history etc. She is almost a conspiracy theorist to an extent. She has suggested going to a Methodist Church which is just down the road from us(I was raised Methodist, grandpa and uncle were/are preachers)just as a place for the kids and community etc. I told her I had 0 interest in doing so.
She still believes in the idea of God, and Jesus Christ, but is skeptical of parts of the Bible, history etc. She is almost a conspiracy theorist to an extent. She has suggested going to a Methodist Church which is just down the road from us(I was raised Methodist, grandpa and uncle were/are preachers)just as a place for the kids and community etc. I told her I had 0 interest in doing so.
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hoping4more
Guest
Found this article though our situation is a little different.
hi,
You go for very very difficult time in your marriage.
It’s very hard…
If this is just an issue of health, you and the children could watch mass on the tv or on the radio. You could propose that in a non agressive way, or decide to do so.
But, from what you said, health issue is just an pretext no? She will not be happy if you watch the mass on a TV? (It will be supported sex scandal?)
You can pray at home with your children, learn them to do that, to open their heart toward God, read the Bible, some catholic litterature for children…
And go to mass in another day of the week alone?
It’s just suggestions, as I am not in this situation.
My mother has got this 180°turn to anti-catholicism and athetism when I was 16. For 10 years, I go to the mass alone, under my mother back. But She always caught me when I left the home and argued at me. My father stop any religious activity, even Christmas mass. She didn’t go to my confirmation.
I just pray for her for ten years during each time I go to the Eucharist. (take the communion for her). I believe it’s worked. She is now always a strong atheist with wiew on the world society, contrary to the Church, but is somewhat more peaceful.
She go to my marriage and my child’s baptism.
You go for very very difficult time in your marriage.
It’s very hard…
If this is just an issue of health, you and the children could watch mass on the tv or on the radio. You could propose that in a non agressive way, or decide to do so.
But, from what you said, health issue is just an pretext no? She will not be happy if you watch the mass on a TV? (It will be supported sex scandal?)
You can pray at home with your children, learn them to do that, to open their heart toward God, read the Bible, some catholic litterature for children…
And go to mass in another day of the week alone?
It’s just suggestions, as I am not in this situation.
My mother has got this 180°turn to anti-catholicism and athetism when I was 16. For 10 years, I go to the mass alone, under my mother back. But She always caught me when I left the home and argued at me. My father stop any religious activity, even Christmas mass. She didn’t go to my confirmation.
I just pray for her for ten years during each time I go to the Eucharist. (take the communion for her). I believe it’s worked. She is now always a strong atheist with wiew on the world society, contrary to the Church, but is somewhat more peaceful.
She go to my marriage and my child’s baptism.
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crenfro
Guest
Hello.
Please, just keep trying to be a good Catholic. You sound like you have a lot on your plate right now.
What are your priorities? I know what mine should be, but I so often fall short. My husband isn’t exactly anti -catholic, he’s agnostic. The apathy is worse than being anti - Catholic because somewhere deep in a person’s heart there’s anger, and where there’s anger, something is invested in it.
Anyway, how I understand things, is that the priority should be the salvation of the soul of my spouse, and if I had children, their salvation too.
What the best way for you to do this I can’t say, but I do know you need to keep on practicing your faith as best you can.
You are in my prayers. Please pray for me.
Please, just keep trying to be a good Catholic. You sound like you have a lot on your plate right now.
What are your priorities? I know what mine should be, but I so often fall short. My husband isn’t exactly anti -catholic, he’s agnostic. The apathy is worse than being anti - Catholic because somewhere deep in a person’s heart there’s anger, and where there’s anger, something is invested in it.
Anyway, how I understand things, is that the priority should be the salvation of the soul of my spouse, and if I had children, their salvation too.
What the best way for you to do this I can’t say, but I do know you need to keep on practicing your faith as best you can.
You are in my prayers. Please pray for me.
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Theo520
Guest
So your wife is also Catholic? Is she still active since you converted?yes, catholic wedding, I converted the following Easter.
I don’t really understand why you call her ‘anti-catholic’ there must be more to the story
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hoping4more
Guest
No, turned from the Church. Has no desire to return and detests me for taking our kids.
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hoping4more
Guest
This is in essence it.She has been Catholic since she was 12. Found out about the sex abuse scandels and decided she did not want to go to Mass, believes by attending that I or anyone is supporting the church’s decision to move priest around and it has institutional flaws. Obviously, I do not see it that way. Basically, she did a 180 degree turn from when we got married to 1 1/2 years later.
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Theo520
Guest
You are in a tough bind since she’s right that the Church is completely filled with flawed people.This is in essence it.
Perhaps try to focus on the Church teachings, that in spite of Church flaws still help us to reflect on our actions and mature spiritually. I think she is lacking forgiveness, which could be a focus of your discussions with her.
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Viki63
Guest
I would suggest talking to her, once the intense treatments are done, about your feeling of responsibility for your children. Your first priority should be baptizing your children so that you don’t put it off so long that they refuse.
I would explain that you feel this responsibility strongly and that it’s your obligation, and ask her to support you in it.
The sex scandals happened many years ago, and terrible though they were, it is much less frequent now. It happens much more often in schools; does she plan to keep your children out of school?
And remember the media plays up everything that happens, especially when it’s horrible, to pull in readers and viewers. The church is a hospital for sinners, not a hotel for saints.
I would explain that you feel this responsibility strongly and that it’s your obligation, and ask her to support you in it.
The sex scandals happened many years ago, and terrible though they were, it is much less frequent now. It happens much more often in schools; does she plan to keep your children out of school?
And remember the media plays up everything that happens, especially when it’s horrible, to pull in readers and viewers. The church is a hospital for sinners, not a hotel for saints.
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Loud-living-dogma
Guest
My husband used to have zero interest in church. Long story short, I never thought he would come back to the church, but ten years ago he did, now he’s a 4th degree Knight, etc. I think there is always hope! This sounds terrible, but sometimes a little reverse psychology works great. Also I agree with everyone else here that now is not the time to worry about it. Just be positive and non-pushy.
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