Apologetics comes down to pride

[Apolojez]

As a former anti-Catholic, I’ve seen both side of the apologetic discussion on doctrine. But simply put, all the scriptural evidence means nothing unless a person is open to listening and accepting that he or she could conceivably be wrong. This is easier said than done.

Let’s compare an atheist, muslim, hindu, buddhist, and a christian. If I ask you to choose which one has the truth, naturally we all would choose the christian. Yet if we take a Baptist, Mormon, JW, Methodist, SDA, and a Catholic we’d begin to see a seperation based on our own beliefs of what we already know. So the question is “how does a person find truth”? How does a person brought up to believe one thing come to accept a belief completely foreign?

The answer is humility. Anyone who’s purpose is to convert others to his faith isn’t humble in my experience. Their purpose isn’t based on love and compassion but is built on pride and arrogance. Pride in their own knowledge and arrogance that only they know the truth. From my experience, only a person who is genuine in spirit and humility can accept God’s truth.

Ask yourself why should an atheist or muslim be willing to accept your truth if you are unwilling to accept theirs? Why should a Protestant accept that Mary was a perpetual virgin if we are unwilling to accept their view should they prove it true?

Obviously since I abandoned my anti-Catholic ways I believe the CC holds the truth but my journey could not have taken place had I not submitted myself to God’s will rather than my own and trusted that He would guide me to whatever truth He had for me. But it was in humility that I came to know this and it should be in humility that I share what I’ve learned. Despite my occasional human failings.

People often say they have an open mind, but in reality, most have already made up their mind. It’s human nature. There’s a reason why Jesus constantly preached humility. Because only a humble heart can admit error and sharing your faith with genuine humility allows others to be humble. The first thing people will notice about you is your demeanor. Go on the attack and you will be labeled a “hater” and their mind closes anything you present to them.

 

[adf417]

As a former anti-Catholic, I’ve seen both side of the apologetic discussion on doctrine. But simply put, all the scriptural evidence means nothing unless a person is open to listening and accepting that he or she could conceivably be wrong. This is easier said than done.

Let’s compare an atheist, muslim, hindu, buddhist, and a christian. If I ask you to choose which one has the truth, naturally we all would choose the christian. Yet if we take a Baptist, Mormon, JW, Methodist, SDA, and a Catholic we’d begin to see a seperation based on our own beliefs of what we already know. So the question is “how does a person find truth”? How does a person brought up to believe one thing come to accept a belief completely foreign?

The answer is humility. Anyone who’s purpose is to convert others to his faith isn’t humble in my experience. Their purpose isn’t based on love and compassion but is built on pride and arrogance. Pride in their own knowledge and arrogance that only they know the truth. From my experience, only a person who is genuine in spirit and humility can accept God’s truth.

Ask yourself why should an atheist or muslim be willing to accept your truth if you are unwilling to accept theirs? Why should a Protestant accept that Mary was a perpetual virgin if we are unwilling to accept their view should they prove it true?

Obviously since I abandoned my anti-Catholic ways I believe the CC holds the truth but my journey could not have taken place had I not submitted myself to God’s will rather than my own and trusted that He would guide me to whatever truth He had for me. But it was in humility that I came to know this and it should be in humility that I share what I’ve learned. Despite my occasional human failings.

People often say they have an open mind, but in reality, most have already made up their mind. It’s human nature. There’s a reason why Jesus constantly preached humility. Because only a humble heart can admit error and sharing your faith with genuine humility allows others to be humble. The first thing people will notice about you is your demeanor. Go on the attack and you will be labeled a “hater” and their mind closes anything you present to them.

Indeed brother! I agree.

But within Christianity itself it is sad how scriptures like Jeremiah 29:8 and 1 John 3:7 are used to cloud this truth.

Peace brother!!!

 

[Goya]

@ OP:

Your thread title seems a bit disjointed from your OP. I’d say pride is definitely one of the biggest obstacles to overcome in apologetics. But there are other factors–such as familiarity-- or rather, fear of the unknown/unfamiliar. Still another very significant factor that often goes unspoken–is love–as in, the love we have for our loved ones. What I mean here, is–taking my own case–hypothetically–if my faith journey led me to conclude that Catholicism was in error, then the implications would be devestating, when applied to all my Catholic loved ones–especially those who have ‘gone to rest’–such as my grandparents.

In acutality, how it played out, is that I looked under the hood of my Catholic Faith, in earnest (I like to believe, anyway–particularly since my children’s fate was now my responsibility–so it wasn’t just about me anymore…)–and was pleasantly confirmed in all my questions, as I was able to find a consistent thread leading all the way back to the Apostles, on most every significant issue. My search has made me ever the more humbled and grateful to my parents for having given me what I realized was the single greatest gift they gave me (of all they gave me)–as well as to God above, for having blessed me with such fortuitous circumstances. That’s me.

My point however, is that dismissing resistence merely or even just mostly to pride–is probably at least overly broad brushing the issue. There are many factors involved. Pride is certainly one of them–even a great one–but things can get much more complicated than that.

But your point is well taken. Good first thread, Apologez. Stimulating topic–lot’s to discuss here…(potentially, anyway).

 

[Goya]

Apolojez;10511228]…

Obviously since I abandoned my anti-Catholic ways I believe the CC holds the truth but my journey could not have taken place*** had I not submitted myself to God’s will ***rather than my own and trusted that He would guide me to whatever truth He had for me. But it was in humility that I came to know this and it should be in humility that I share what I’ve learned. Despite my occasional human failings.

btw: this is very commendable. Kudos to you.

People often say they have an open mind, but in reality, most have already made up their mind. It’s human nature. There’s a reason why Jesus constantly preached humility. Because only a humble heart can admit error and sharing your faith with genuine humility allows others to be humble. The first thing people will notice about you is your demeanor. Go on the attack and you will be labeled a “hater” and their mind closes anything you present to them.

Very true, and insightful.

Curious…how did you come to terms with your search for Truth/Faith journey–and the implications that follow, when applied to your anti-Catholic loved ones?

 

[Michael_Allen]

Hi Apolojez

I agree. I think frequently apologetics seems much more about winning an argument than about sharing Good News, or even being willing to learn ourselves from our interlocutor.

I’ve also noticed that “apologists” of many flavours tend to focus on, and emphasize, what makes their position unique or different. You won’t, it seems, get too many Christian or Muslim apologists sitting down with each other to explore what their faiths have in common. Some people, though thankfully not all, would rather have an argument than a discussion.

I wonder if the internet has made things worse - as many discussions are now rather anonymous. Two people using nicknames, I think, behave differently from two people meeting in real life where social etiquette demands (sensibly) we ask a little bit about another person rather than immediately asking their views on some matter of teaching or doctrine. I like how the first disciples asked our Lord “where do you live?” (John 1:37). They instinctively wanted to know about the person of Jesus as an important first step in learning what he had to teach. Hopefully as the internet technology develops it will allow a richer relationship between people so we can all get to know a little about where another person lives before engaging in a detailed discussion/debate.

What was your allegiance before coming to the Catholic Church?

God bless +

 

[Brighitte]

My dear friend,
Although there is much truth to what you have said, there are some things I’d like to bring up.
I believe that many apologists can be prideful and arrogant, and that if I, myself, were extremely learned, I may lose the humility that I should have when speaking to others, but not all apologists are simply arrogant.
Jesus spent his life evangelizing and called the Apostles to be “fishers of men”, St. Paul tells us to “humble” when speaking to others, but to speak nonetheless, it is a major responsibility for a Christian.
When one has “the Truth”, it is easy to fall into arrogance, eventually, impatience with others, and soon hatred for others. This is not what Christ wanted, I agree. When St. Anthony of Padua became a Franciscan, he struggled at first with humility because he wanted to be poor and uneducated, St Francis noticed this and said that it was much harder to be humble when one came from the background that Anthony came from (well-educated, upper class), than for someone already poor to join the order. I understand the struggle to be humble, but it is not an impossible one. St. Anthony became a wonderful saint.
Perhaps you have encountered rude Catholics in your life that prove your point, it’s definitely possible. However, when one has “the Truth” in their hands, then out of love, don’t you want others to have it too? Others to be saved as well? It’s important to speak respectfully, and listen to others when they speak to you, but it’s not to acknowledge that they may have the truth, for Truth is not subjective or relativistic, but to acknowledge them, who they are, where they are coming from, if one truly cares about the person in front of them, then one will make oneself more sensitive to them. (It’s also common courtesy to listen attentively).
I have often found that I respond more intelligently to someone ‘anti-Catholic’ when I have fully listened to their arguments and then thought about my reply, rather than when I have spent the entire time thinking about what I’m going to say when it’s my turn, while they’re talking to me. This is because of a few things: 1. It makes me trust God more, that He’ll indeed speak through me even through my nerves, limited time to think, and disorganized little knowledge. 2. It makes me more compassionate, caring, and humble to really listen to someone and care about their feelings. 3. It makes me more educated in the way I formulate my response, people need to hear things differently sometimes.
Your truth, is God. Therefore, it is not arrogance to acknowledge that you are right, and others are wrong, it’s reverent. It becomes arrogant when you think yourself better than someone else because you have Faith and they don’t.
Sometimes, we are not even called to speak, but to get down on our knees and pray for someone (without them knowing), to truly demonstrate we care for their conversion. As long as your heart is in the right place, meaning you’re an apologist to lead others to the Truth rather than to better equip yourself to outsmart others if you’re ever challenged, then it is perfectly acceptable.
You do well to highlight the problem of arrogance and lack of humility in people of our Faith, it plagues us all.
May the Holy Spirit help us in everything we do, and may submission to the holy Mother of God help purify even our good actions, because the Devil and our own sinfulness find a way to taint and distort our intentions for even our best actions.

 

[Goya]

Hi Apolojez

I agree. I think frequently apologetics seems much more about winning an argument than about sharing Good News, or even being willing to learn ourselves from our interlocutor.

I’ve also noticed that “apologists” of many flavours tend to focus on, and emphasize, what makes their position unique or different. You won’t, it seems, get too many Christian or Muslim apologists sitting down with each other to explore what their faiths have in common. Some people, though thankfully not all, would rather have an argument than a discussion.

I wonder if the internet has made things worse - as many discussions are now rather anonymous. Two people using nicknames, I think, behave differently from two people meeting in real life where social etiquette demands (sensibly) we ask a little bit about another person rather than immediately asking their views on some matter of teaching or doctrine. I like how the first disciples asked our Lord “where do you live?” (John 1:37). They instinctively wanted to know about the person of Jesus as an important first step in learning what he had to teach. Hopefully as the internet technology develops it will allow a richer relationship between people so we can all get to know a little about where another person lives before engaging in a detailed discussion/debate.

What was your allegiance before coming to the Catholic Church?

God bless +

All very true.

The upside to the internet though, is that it streamlines the exchange of information–the zealous advocacy approach seems much more effective in getting down to brass tacks as to what the different schools of thought/religiosn/philosphies etc., believe–without the diplomacy, and dancing around the meat of the issues, that seem to jam up such discussions in person.

Bottom line–your point is well taken, but the flip side, is that the anonymity acts as an extraordinary lubricant for the free exchange of information and knowlege. IOW, we learn much more, much faster–by dispensing with the niceties (while remaining charitable).

…and of course, the real world is still there…we just get to go back, better prepared!

…also, better that folks vent their frustrations out anonymously on the 'net, than taking it into the real world.

Just pointing out a differenet perspective–not really disagreeing with you.

 

[Lancer]

As a former anti-Catholic, I’ve seen both side of the apologetic discussion on doctrine. But simply put,** all the scriptural evidence means nothing unless a person is open to listening and accepting that he or she could conceivably be wrong.**** That is why we have the Pope and the Magisterium and our bishops who are in communion with the Pope…that communion of Truth is in all matters of faith and morals…I don’t have to consider that I might be wrong,if I am in communion with the Church’s teachings on faith and morals…its that simple…profound but simple**.]This is easier said than done.

Let’s compare an atheist, muslim, hindu, buddhist, and a christian. If I ask you to choose which one has the truth, naturally we all would choose the christian. Yet if we take a Baptist, Mormon, JW, Methodist, SDA, and a Catholic we’d begin to see a seperation based on our own beliefs of what we already know. So the question is “how does a person find truth”? Easy…faith and moral truths are always found in completeness…fullness…in the Magisterium] How does a person brought up to believe one thing come to accept a belief completely foreign?

The answer is humility. humility doe not guarantee finding the truth…accepting the truth…yes…but just because you have humility…does not guarantee you have grasped truth…look at all the good people in humility that support gay marriage or embryonic stem cell research…or contraception] Anyone who’s purpose is to convert others to his faith isn’t humble in my experience.see Matt 28"18-20] Their purpose isn’t based on love and compassion but is built on pride and arrogance. Pride in their own knowledge and arrogance that only they know the truth. From my experience, only a person who is genuine in spirit and humility can accept God’s truth.

Ask yourself why should an atheist or muslim be willing to accept your truth if you are unwilling to accept theirs? Why should a Protestant accept that Mary was a perpetual virgin if we are unwilling to accept their view should they prove it true?

Obviously since I abandoned my anti-Catholic ways I believe the CC holds the truth but my journey could not have taken place had I not submitted myself to God’s will rather than my own and trusted that He would guide me to whatever truth He had for me. But it was in humility that I came to know this and it should be in humility that I share what I’ve learned. Despite my occasional human failings.

People often say they have an open mind, but in reality, most have already made up their mind. It’s human nature. There’s a reason why Jesus constantly preached humility. Because only a humble heart can admit error and sharing your faith with genuine humility allows others to be humble. The first thing people will notice about you is your demeanor. Go on the attack and you will be labeled a “hater” and their mind closes anything you present to them.

CCC-771 “The one mediator, Christ, established and ever sustains here on earth his holy** Church, the community of faith, hope, and charity, as a visible organization through which he communicates truth and grace to all men**.” The Church is at the same time:…

• a "society structured with hierarchical organs and the mystical body of Christ;

• the visible society and the spiritual community;

• the earthly Church and the Church endowed with heavenly riches."

These dimensions together constitute “one complex reality which comes together from a human and a divine element”:

The Church is essentially both human and divine, visible but endowed with invisible realities, zealous in action and dedicated to contemplation, present in the world, but as a pilgrim, so constituted that in her the human is directed toward and subordinated to the divine, the visible to the invisible, action to contemplation, and this present world to that city yet to come, the object of our quest. …

CCC-559 How will Jerusalem welcome her Messiah? Although Jesus had always refused popular attempts to make him king, he chooses the time and prepares the details for his messianic entry into the city of “his father David”.308 Acclaimed as son of David, as the one who brings salvation (Hosanna means “Save!” or “Give salvation!”), the “King of glory” enters his City "riding on an *".309 Jesus conquers the Daughter of Zion, a figure of his Church, neither by ruse nor by violence, but by the humility that bears witness to the truth.**310 And so the subjects of his kingdom on that day are children and God’s poor, who acclaim him as had the angels when they announced him to the shepherds.311 Their acclamation, “Blessed be he who comes in the name of the Lord”,312 is taken up by the Church in the “Sanctus” of the Eucharistic liturgy that introduces the memorial of the Lord’s Passover.

Bottom line…it seems you are getting “sales” mixed up with “management”…we are in “sales”… Evangelization. If someone accepts our Evangelization “sales” effort…it is because of “management”…the graces poured into a person’s intellect and conscience by the power of God the Holy Spirit

Lastly, Blessed Pope John Paul II…said what I think you are driving at…“the Church only proposes…it never imposes”…but…it must propose to all mankind in whatever place or faith…the fullness of Truth – Our Lord Jesus Christ Himself (see John 14:6) – of the Catholic Faith.

For your consideration.
Pax Christi

 

[Michael_Allen]

Just pointing out a differenet perspective–not really disagreeing with you.

Yes, I can see what you are getting at - that you can hone in doctrines quickly in an internet environment. I think that can sometimes be good, yes. I’m reminded though of a conversation I once had with an Eastern Orthodox Christian and I was asking him whether there was something like the Catechism, but for the EOC, that I could get to better understand Eastern Orthodoxy. “No,” he replied “the only way to understand the Orthodox faith is to immerse yourself in it and live it”. Over time I’ve come round more to that way of thinking myself - that at the end of the day it’s very hard to really understand another’s faith because we don’t live it.

It reminds me of the old adage - before criticising a man you should walk two miles in his shoes. That way, when you do criticise him, you have a two mile head-start and he has no shoes to run after you in

 

[JustaServant]

As a former anti-Catholic, I’ve seen both side of the apologetic discussion on doctrine. But simply put, all the scriptural evidence means nothing unless a person is open to listening and accepting that he or she could conceivably be wrong. This is easier said than done.

Let’s compare an atheist, muslim, hindu, buddhist, and a christian. If I ask you to choose which one has the truth, naturally we all would choose the christian. Yet if we take a Baptist, Mormon, JW, Methodist, SDA, and a Catholic we’d begin to see a seperation based on our own beliefs of what we already know. So the question is “how does a person find truth”? How does a person brought up to believe one thing come to accept a belief completely foreign?

The answer is humility. Anyone who’s purpose is to convert others to his faith isn’t humble in my experience. Their purpose isn’t based on love and compassion but is built on pride and arrogance. Pride in their own knowledge and arrogance that only they know the truth. From my experience, only a person who is genuine in spirit and humility can accept God’s truth.

Ask yourself why should an atheist or muslim be willing to accept your truth if you are unwilling to accept theirs? Why should a Protestant accept that Mary was a perpetual virgin if we are unwilling to accept their view should they prove it true?

Obviously since I abandoned my anti-Catholic ways I believe the CC holds the truth but my journey could not have taken place had I not submitted myself to God’s will rather than my own and trusted that He would guide me to whatever truth He had for me. But it was in humility that I came to know this and it should be in humility that I share what I’ve learned. Despite my occasional human failings.

People often say they have an open mind, but in reality, most have already made up their mind. It’s human nature. There’s a reason why Jesus constantly preached humility. Because only a humble heart can admit error and sharing your faith with genuine humility allows others to be humble. The first thing people will notice about you is your demeanor. Go on the attack and you will be labeled a “hater” and their mind closes anything you present to them.

:thumbsup:from a former anti-Catholic myself.

 

[Apolojez]

@ OP:

Your thread title seems a bit disjointed from your OP. I’d say pride is definitely one of the biggest obstacles to overcome in apologetics. But there are other factors–such as familiarity-- or rather, fear of the unknown/unfamiliar. Still another very significant factor that often goes unspoken–is love–as in, the love we have for our loved ones. What I mean here, is–taking my own case–hypothetically–if my faith journey led me to conclude that Catholicism was in error, then the implications would be devestating, when applied to all my Catholic loved ones–especially those who have ‘gone to rest’–such as my grandparents.

In acutality, how it played out, is that I looked under the hood of my Catholic Faith, in earnest (I like to believe, anyway–particularly since my children’s fate was now my responsibility–so it wasn’t just about me anymore…)–and was pleasantly confirmed in all my questions, as I was able to find a consistent thread leading all the way back to the Apostles, on most every significant issue. My search has made me ever the more humbled and grateful to my parents for having given me what I realized was the single greatest gift they gave me (of all they gave me)–as well as to God above, for having blessed me with such fortuitous circumstances. That’s me.

My point however, is that dismissing resistence merely or even just mostly to pride–is probably at least overly broad brushing the issue. There are many factors involved. Pride is certainly one of them–even a great one–but things can get much more complicated than that.

But your point is well taken. Good first thread, Apologez. Stimulating topic–lot’s to discuss here…(potentially, anyway).

Perhaps you could suggest a better title then since I butchered it. I tried to simplify things (perhaps too much) and used my own faith journey as a guide. I felt I was simply arrogant for assuming that I had been born into the truth. It was pride in myself, rather than compassion, that led me to try to “save” everyone who didn’t have my truth.

Luckily your faith was reaffirmed while mine was destroyed. It was a shock knowing that generations of my family opposed this. But to be honest, since I had already laid it all out for God to reveal to me then I was overjoyed at finally finding that truth I had always sought. I think I should always try to remember who I was and my journey into the CC so that I can openly speak to others who may attack my beliefs as I once did.

Thank you for the reply friend.

 

[JustaServant]

Perhaps you could suggest a better title then since I butchered it. I tried to simplify things (perhaps too much) and used my own faith journey as a guide. I felt I was simply arrogant for assuming that I had been born into the truth. It was pride in myself, rather than compassion, that led me to try to “save” everyone who didn’t have my truth.

Luckily your faith was reaffirmed while mine was destroyed. It was a shock knowing that generations of my family opposed this. But to be honest, since I had already laid it all out for God to reveal to me then I was overjoyed at finally finding that truth I had always sought. I think I should always try to remember who I was and my journey into the CC so that I can openly speak to others who may attack my beliefs as I once did.

Thank you for the reply friend.

You might want to ask the mod, Michael Francis, if he could change the title for you.

 

[Apolojez]

Apolojez;10511228]…

btw: this is very commendable. Kudos to you.

Very true, and insightful.

Curious…how did you come to terms with your search for Truth/Faith journey–and the implications that follow, when applied to your anti-Catholic loved ones?

My father has passed on. But my mother still reads scripture daily. She’s basically uneducated and has her own particular dogma at this point in her life. I hate to say this about her but she pretty much shoved the bible down her children’s throats every chance she got. It was likely what led me to begin seeking truth in the first place.

And it was her refusal to concede that black was actually white, despite the mounds of evidence you laid before her, that probably allowed me to surrender my will because I just couldn’t be like her. I’ve shared my testimony and explained my faith to my family and friends but no miracles have taken place. I see one of my brothers every week and some of my friends but unfortunately most conversations with my mother turn sour so I don’t see her much.

 

[Apolojez]

Hi Apolojez

I agree. I think frequently apologetics seems much more about winning an argument than about sharing Good News, or even being willing to learn ourselves from our interlocutor.

I’ve also noticed that “apologists” of many flavours tend to focus on, and emphasize, what makes their position unique or different. You won’t, it seems, get too many Christian or Muslim apologists sitting down with each other to explore what their faiths have in common. Some people, though thankfully not all, would rather have an argument than a discussion.

I wonder if the internet has made things worse - as many discussions are now rather anonymous. Two people using nicknames, I think, behave differently from two people meeting in real life where social etiquette demands (sensibly) we ask a little bit about another person rather than immediately asking their views on some matter of teaching or doctrine. I like how the first disciples asked our Lord “where do you live?” (John 1:37). They instinctively wanted to know about the person of Jesus as an important first step in learning what he had to teach. Hopefully as the internet technology develops it will allow a richer relationship between people so we can all get to know a little about where another person lives before engaging in a detailed discussion/debate.

What was your allegiance before coming to the Catholic Church?

God bless +

I think many of us want to feel like we “achieve” something with our discussions, which again is human nature. You bring up an excellent point though. We don’t spend any time at all trying to meet one another but rather we jump right into “I’m right and you’re wrong”. I do admit I would like to “achieve” something with this thread in that hopefully myself or another will find something helpful or be willing to try a new idea or approach that is suggested. I personally like your point about meeting people.

Whoops. Almost forgot your last question. My father was a “fire and brimstone” baptist but my mother was actually opposed to organized religion so after they divorced I went adrift. First to a non-denom (which was basically Pentecostal). I went to CoC and finally a small Nazarene church after I was married that my Catholic wife actually enjoyed but they eventually implied that we should either join or stop coming.

 

[Apolojez]

My dear friend,
Although there is much truth to what you have said, there are some things I’d like to bring up.
I believe that many apologists can be prideful and arrogant, and that if I, myself, were extremely learned, I may lose the humility that I should have when speaking to others, but not all apologists are simply arrogant.
Jesus spent his life evangelizing and called the Apostles to be “fishers of men”, St. Paul tells us to “humble” when speaking to others, but to speak nonetheless, it is a major responsibility for a Christian.
When one has “the Truth”, it is easy to fall into arrogance, eventually, impatience with others, and soon hatred for others. This is not what Christ wanted, I agree. When St. Anthony of Padua became a Franciscan, he struggled at first with humility because he wanted to be poor and uneducated, St Francis noticed this and said that it was much harder to be humble when one came from the background that Anthony came from (well-educated, upper class), than for someone already poor to join the order. I understand the struggle to be humble, but it is not an impossible one. St. Anthony became a wonderful saint.
Perhaps you have encountered rude Catholics in your life that prove your point, it’s definitely possible. However, when one has “the Truth” in their hands, then out of love, don’t you want others to have it too? Others to be saved as well? It’s important to speak respectfully, and listen to others when they speak to you, but it’s not to acknowledge that they may have the truth, for Truth is not subjective or relativistic, but to acknowledge them, who they are, where they are coming from, if one truly cares about the person in front of them, then one will make oneself more sensitive to them. (It’s also common courtesy to listen attentively).
I have often found that I respond more intelligently to someone ‘anti-Catholic’ when I have fully listened to their arguments and then thought about my reply, rather than when I have spent the entire time thinking about what I’m going to say when it’s my turn, while they’re talking to me. This is because of a few things: 1. It makes me trust God more, that He’ll indeed speak through me even through my nerves, limited time to think, and disorganized little knowledge. 2. It makes me more compassionate, caring, and humble to really listen to someone and care about their feelings. 3. It makes me more educated in the way I formulate my response, people need to hear things differently sometimes.
Your truth, is God. Therefore, it is not arrogance to acknowledge that you are right, and others are wrong, it’s reverent. It becomes arrogant when you think yourself better than someone else because you have Faith and they don’t.
Sometimes, we are not even called to speak, but to get down on our knees and pray for someone (without them knowing), to truly demonstrate we care for their conversion. As long as your heart is in the right place, meaning you’re an apologist to lead others to the Truth rather than to better equip yourself to outsmart others if you’re ever challenged, then it is perfectly acceptable.
You do well to highlight the problem of arrogance and lack of humility in people of our Faith, it plagues us all.
May the Holy Spirit help us in everything we do, and may submission to the holy Mother of God help purify even our good actions, because the Devil and our own sinfulness find a way to taint and distort our intentions for even our best actions.

Thank you for replying Brighitte. I didn’t mean to imply that all apologists are arrogant and prideful and that each and every discussion we have could potentially change our dogma. I just meant that we, who know what it’s like to “convert” to another faith should remember that everytime we speak with anyone.

Sorry you thought I meant that Catholics were rude to me but I was actually speaking about myself and others from my anti-Catholic past. I behaved insensitivly and no one had any chance of getting a point across because my mind was racing a mile-a-minute thinking of my next point or jab. I was out to win a debate plain and simple.

Like you, it’s hard for me to to discuss things in person because my thoughts overtake the speed of the discussion and I find I interrupt others just so I don’t forget my next response. Thankfully I can type a reply and edit, cut and paste it into the order that makes sense before I submit.

 

[Goya]

My father has passed on. But my mother still reads scripture daily. She’s basically uneducated and has her own particular dogma at this point in her life. I hate to say this about her but she pretty much shoved the bible down her children’s throats every chance she got. It was likely what led me to begin seeking truth in the first place.

And it was her refusal to concede that black was actually white, despite the mounds of evidence you laid before her, that probably allowed me to surrender my will because I just couldn’t be like her. I’ve shared my testimony and explained my faith to my family and friends but no miracles have taken place. I see one of my brothers every week and some of my friends but unfortunately most conversations with my mother turn sour so I don’t see her much.

Sorry to hear about your father. …and the rest of it actually–sounds rough–but it seems your priorities are commendably ‘right ordered’. Keep the Faith!

…and thanks for sharing your story so freely–very inspiring!