Applying to Catholic School Road Block

[Norm_The_Robot]

I’ve been hearing rumors that our parish school is even planning to scrap the parish discount soon too. WTF. Maybe they can spend less on smart board and fiber optic cable.

 

[EasterJoy]

…What kind of Catholic charity is it to demand that families already barely scraping by give a set amount to the church to even be CONSIDERED for a chance at a better education? Hypocrisy like that is why people leave the church!

The OP’s family is in the class that the Church typically gives extra consideration, because of course it is difficult for a single parent to support a family. She is short on both time and money, and also lacks the adult support of a spouse for herself and a father in the home to help her with the formation of her children.

Still, it is rash judgment to say that the parish in question is hypocritical for giving those who do scrape up their mite to contribute to their parish consideration ahead of those who are not to be seen except when they want something.

Those who want something for nothing unfortunately outnumber those who truly have neither time nor money in even a small amount to contribute to their parish. This is why I think it would be wise for the OP to get someone the parish knows to vouch for her. Someone from the high school would be a particularly good choice. Then the parish will know that she is not among the least deserving of their limited ability to help those in need, but among the most deserving and also among the most likely of parents to help the school later on down the line. The family of a struggling teacher is very likely to be a great contributor to the school. They really ought to jump at getting her on board. They do need to be educated about the full situation, though.

 

[EasterJoy]

I’ve been hearing rumors that our parish school is even planning to scrap the parish discount soon too. WTF. Maybe they can spend less on smart board and fiber optic cable.

Even the public school has to keep up with technological advances. Contemporary education requires technical education, and technological education requires equipment.

Getting rid of the parish discount may have more to do with the practical difficulty of identifying who is and is not a parishioner. Sometimes the people who are the most active in a parish do not live within its boundaries–this is particularly true of legacy families who remain in a parish after changing addresses within the local area–and geographical boundaries are the only definitive guide to “in” or “out.” After that, it is always going to be a judgment call, because there truly is a continuum of connection that even an active Catholic might have with one particular parish.

 

[pianistclare]

Here’s the thing:
Everybody wants the Catholic schools to compete with the private schools.
For the most part, they can’t. They’re not gong to have the state of the art IT dept. without charging exorbitant prices. So people get mad.

They aren’t going to have qualified lay people in Religious Ed because they want to spend their money elsewhere. The nuns are gone. So people get mad.

They believe that the Church is loaded, and that the church should give charity to everybody. The don’t, they can’t, but they’d love to. So people get mad.

People think that stiffing the parish school is no big deal, because they’re Catholic after all right? They receive delinquent notices. So people get mad.

People think that all it takes to run a school is a set of outdated textbooks and some desks because it’s a Catholic school. But the schools have to be state accredited, and also receive NCEA accreditation, and follow standards. So they charge a lot of money because many of the parishioners have an “I raised my family already, I’m done let those other parents worry about it” attitude about support for the parish school. So people get mad.

Many families have 2 working parents now, so people have little time to volunteer, work the cafeteria, organize the class projects for the auction, or coach the Science Olympiad team after hours. So the schools ask people to sign a volunteering contract. So people get mad.

I worked in a Catholic School for 10 years as a DRE. Never again. Constant drama, unhappy underpaid, unappreciated teachers, and parents who don’t understand that the church is not loaded. We even had people advance that if the school got rid of weekly Mass, the kids could have more time in math class or on the playground, and that would do them more good. Every time someone earned a privilege, it came out of religion class time. My class could always be bumped. I was not allowed to talk about morality. It might offend the non-Catholics. I could not collect coins for the missions, it might prompt someone to steal. I could not have candles for an Advent wreath. Too hazardous for even the 3 minute prayer and reflection. I could not ask what the Gospel reading was on a Monday from the Sunday liturgy. People might be embarrassed because they don’t attend Mass, so let’s not talk about the Gospel message. One of my religion teachers in a middle school grade was told instead of having the kids discuss the religion chapters, they would get a lot out of it if they just diagrammed the chapters instead. That way the kids couldn’t go home and catechize their folks who would just call and complain.

The bottom line is, it’s a headache for the priests who may or may not have much to do with these policies, and get flack from all sides.

 

[Xantippe]

Here’s the thing:
Everybody wants the Catholic schools to compete with the private schools.
For the most part, they can’t. They’re not gong to have the state of the art IT dept. without charging exorbitant prices. So people get mad.

They aren’t going to have qualified lay people in Religious Ed because they want to spend their money elsewhere. The nuns are gone. So people get mad.

They believe that the Church is loaded, and that the church should give charity to everybody. The don’t, they can’t, but they’d love to. So people get mad.

People think that stiffing the parish school is no big deal, because they’re Catholic after all right? They receive delinquent notices. So people get mad.

People think that all it takes to run a school is a set of outdated textbooks and some desks because it’s a Catholic school. But the schools have to be state accredited, and also receive NCEA accreditation, and follow standards. So they charge a lot of money because many of the parishioners have an “I raised my family already, I’m done let those other parents worry about it” attitude about support for the parish school. So people get mad.

Many families have 2 working parents now, so people have little time to volunteer, work the cafeteria, organize the class projects for the auction, or coach the Science Olympiad team after hours. So the schools ask people to sign a volunteering contract. So people get mad.

I worked in a Catholic School for 10 years as a DRE. Never again. Constant drama, unhappy underpaid, unappreciated teachers, and parents who don’t understand that the church is not loaded. We even had people advance that if the school got rid of weekly Mass, the kids could have more time in math class or on the playground, and that would do them more good. Every time someone earned a privilege, it came out of religion class time. My class could always be bumped. I was not allowed to talk about morality. It might offend the non-Catholics. I could not collect coins for the missions, it might prompt someone to steal. I could not have candles for an Advent wreath. Too hazardous for even the 3 minute prayer and reflection. I could not ask what the Gospel reading was on a Monday from the Sunday liturgy. People might be embarrassed because they don’t attend Mass, so let’s not talk about the Gospel message. One of my religion teachers in a middle school grade was told instead of having the kids discuss the religion chapters, they would get a lot out of it if they just diagrammed the chapters instead. That way the kids couldn’t go home and catechize their folks who would just call and complain.

The bottom line is, it’s a headache for the priests who may or may not have much to do with these policies, and get flack from all sides.

We put our oldest into kindergarten at a newish Protestant (but Catholic-friendly) private school 7.5 years ago. At the time, it was about $500 a month and there were often money problems and the salaries were pitiful. (The school had started out as a free homeschool co-op and we put our oldest in before the school was even 5 years old.)

As time has gone by, things have changed. The school has added a high school (it was initially just PK-8) and built a junior/senior high school building. Enrollment has grown. Class sizes have inched up. The number of administrative workers has grown. Salaries are no longer pitiful (but presumably also not public school level). It has also gotten much, much more serious about sports (apparently that’s GREAT for their bottom line). A senior trip to Europe has recently appeared, etc. School supplies are no longer supplied. The uniform company used is better, but more expensive. As of this summer, we’re now going to be paying about $650 a month each for two kids and I expect it will edge up as time passes and the kids get into older, more expensive grades.

But, the academics are fabulous, it’s very family-like, and I’m very happy my kids are there.

The funny thing is, there’s a new private school starting in town. Reading between the lines, it sounds like they want to do more or less what our kids’ school does, but more cheaply.

And so the cycle continues…

 

[EasterJoy]

…
I worked in a Catholic School for 10 years as a DRE. Never again. Constant drama, unhappy underpaid, unappreciated teachers, and parents who don’t understand that the church is not loaded. We even had people advance that if the school got rid of weekly Mass, the kids could have more time in math class or on the playground, and that would do them more good. Every time someone earned a privilege, it came out of religion class time. My class could always be bumped. I was not allowed to talk about morality. It might offend the non-Catholics. I could not collect coins for the missions, it might prompt someone to steal. I could not have candles for an Advent wreath. Too hazardous for even the 3 minute prayer and reflection. I could not ask what the Gospel reading was on a Monday from the Sunday liturgy. People might be embarrassed because they don’t attend Mass, so let’s not talk about the Gospel message. One of my religion teachers in a middle school grade was told instead of having the kids discuss the religion chapters, they would get a lot out of it if they just diagrammed the chapters instead. That way the kids couldn’t go home and catechize their folks who would just call and complain.

The bottom line is, it’s a headache for the priests who may or may not have much to do with these policies, and get flack from all sides.

That sounds like a problem with the priest or with the bishop. When one of our past bishops asked some students of a school how their parish had gotten its name, he told it as a joke that one of the children assumed the parish had been named after the school.

After over 15 years in our parish, I can say our pastors do not apologize for teaching the faith. One stood in front of the entire parish and the parents of children making their First Holy Communion and told the children that they have a right to come to Mass every week, and they have his permission to drag their parents out of bed on Sundays to take them to Mass. If the parents won’t come, the children were invited to come to talk to him, and HE’D talk to the parents about it directly. He was not the least bit concerned about embarrassing people who weren’t getting their children to Mass every week.

At the school, the classes old enough to have made their First Holy Communion take turns preparing the liturgy for the weekly school Mass. The children at the school literally collect tons of food for St. Vincent de Paul every Advent. Once in 6th grade or above, they are required to put in at least 30 hours of service in the parish and in the community. The majority of those in 7th and 8th grade log in 100 or more. A lot of this is service within the parish or outreach to the world done by the parish, and the parishioners notice that these are their kids, expecting themselves to be engaged with what the rest of the parish is doing. Parents who have service hours for the school (about 15 hours per year) can fulfill that obligation by any work done by the parish. Helping to put up and take down the Christmas decorations counts. It’s all one enterprise.

This is what people paying for a Catholic education want–a Catholic education and a parish school that is an integral part of the life of the parish. When it is a* Catholic* education, lo and behold, the parishioners are willing to pay for it–it is evangelisation! It is passing on the faith! It is what the parish does.

 

[pianistclare]

That sounds like a problem with the priest or with the bishop. When one of our past bishops asked some students of a school how their parish had gotten its name, he told it as a joke that one of the children assumed the parish had been named after the school.

After over 15 years in our parish, I can say our pastors do not apologize for teaching the faith. One stood in front of the entire parish and the parents of children making their First Holy Communion and told the children that they have a right to come to Mass every week, and they have his permission to drag their parents out of bed on Sundays to take them to Mass. If the parents won’t come, the children were invited to come to talk to him, and HE’D talk to the parents about it directly. He was not the least bit concerned about embarrassing people who weren’t getting their children to Mass every week.

At the school, the classes old enough to have made their First Holy Communion take turns preparing the liturgy for the weekly school Mass. The children at the school literally collect tons of food for St. Vincent de Paul every Advent. Once in 6th grade or above, they are required to put in at least 30 hours of service in the parish and in the community. The majority of those in 7th and 8th grade log in 100 or more. A lot of this is service within the parish or outreach to the world done by the parish, and the parishioners notice that these are their kids, expecting themselves to be engaged with what the rest of the parish is doing. Parents who have service hours for the school (about 15 hours per year) can fulfill that obligation by any work done by the parish. Helping to put up and take down the Christmas decorations counts. It’s all one enterprise.

This is what people paying for a Catholic education want–a Catholic education and a parish school that is an integral part of the life of the parish. When it is a* Catholic* education, lo and behold, the parishioners are willing to pay for it–it is evangelisation! It is passing on the faith! It is what the parish does.

The priests here have nothing to do with the running of the private Catholic schools.
If yours is different good for you,
But it’s not that way everywhere.

 

[EasterJoy]

The priests here have nothing to do with the running of the private Catholic schools.
If yours is different good for you,
But it’s not that way everywhere.

Pretty much all of our parish grade schools are under the control of the Archdiocese. The high schools, however, are a slightly different matter. Only some of them are under such direct jurisdiction of the Archdiocese. Even Jesuit High School is not run by the Jesuits any more. Still, being forbidden to ask what the reading was from Sunday? It is not as if knowing it is proof you were at Mass or not knowing it is proof that you weren’t. That is over the top. I know many parents who would be upset to find they were paying for a “Catholic” education that was so gutted as the one you’re talking about. They’d be up in arms.

 

[pianistclare]

Pretty much all of our parish grade schools are under the control of the Archdiocese. The high schools, however, are a slightly different matter. Only some of them are under such direct jurisdiction of the Archdiocese. Even Jesuit High School is not run by the Jesuits any more. Still, being forbidden to ask what the reading was from Sunday? It is not as if knowing it is proof you were at Mass or not knowing it is proof that you weren’t. That is over the top. I know many parents who would be upset to find they were paying for a “Catholic” education that was so gutted as the one you’re talking about. They’d be up in arms.

They are. It makes no difference. The school has lost 52 teachers in 7 years.
But still, nothing changes. Enrollment is the lowest ever. Sad.

 

[YADA]

Am I the only one who finds this policy / line of thinking disgusting? $10 a week may be only 4% of a minimum wage, full-time job, but it’s a lot for a family that’s struggling. First off, that’s 4% of gross income, not after-tax income. Second, $7 is already far below the “living wage” (currently about $15) and not nearly enough to support a family on. A family of 2 (one parent, one child) living on minimum wage is technically living in poverty – they are the very people we are supposed to be raising money to help!

What kind of Catholic charity is it to demand that families already barely scraping by give a set amount to the church to even be CONSIDERED for a chance at a better education? Hypocrisy like that is why people leave the church!

Save your condemnation … I made the percentage calculation - not the parish … to illustrate the cost in the most basic salary … … any family with a real need would be granted reprieve - COMMUNCATION IS KEY HERE …

ALSO o Very few families exist on income that is $7 per hour - and no income tax would be paid if a family was … in fact they would get the Earned Income Credit for one adult and one child existing on $7per hour … plus housing support, food stamps etc …

At our parish school - about 18% of the collection from the Sunday offering is used to support the school - and keep tuition affordable … The school parent association supplements the school operating costs - to keep tuition affordable AND also provides tuition assistance to families in need …

Years ago - parents with fore sight looked into the future … They started an endowment fund … which offers tuition assistance AND helps keep tuition costs low … the archdiocese also offers tuition assistance … even low income parents can afford a Catholic education …

**Its a fact that schools cost money **… its a fact that someone has to pay that cost …

this person - the OP - may have real need - but if you want your child to attend a parish school then you need to offer support for both the parish and the school … and by support - I mean be **PROACTIVELY volunteer, fund raise and contribute what you can financially … **

I understand prioritizing expenditures … I went 15 months without a job 2008-2010 … I know about having to do without …and sacrifices. I did not stop going to church, giving as much as I could nor volunteering many hours each week. … People recognized I was a parishioner … and I split my time and talents between two parishes … Both parishes know who I am - and my support and active participation in both … whether I have a full time job or during that period when I wasn’t