Appropriate Role for non-catholic parent at baptism

[foraker]

Hello. I’m a “non-believer” married to a woman raised catholic. In the near future we are baptising our son in the Catholic Church. Lets presume my wife is in fact going to make an effort to introduce our son to catholicism but that I won’t be part of that effort.

I have (I hope) a simple question. What is the appropriate role for a non-catholic parent during a baptism that would be true to their own beliefs while also showing respect to the Catholic faith? Would it be considered inappropriate to take part in the ceremony but remain quiet during the question and answer bit? If so, how about attending but observing from the pews?

Ultimately I realize I should probably take this up with the priest performing the baptism. However I’d like to accumulate as much information as possible first as balancing my needs, my family’s needs, my in-laws needs and the churches requirements seems a somewhat delicate situation. Thank you for any suggestions.

 

[maryjk]

I don’t know what is right. But I do know what my husband did during our son’s baptism.

He sat/stood next to me, just didn’t answer the questions.

 

[passus]

This shouldn’t be a problem. As a matter of fact, my father was not Catholic when I was baptized.

As far as participation goes, the parents are usually asked to hold the baby, to trace the sign of the cross on the child’s head, and to answer certain questions affirming their faith and their desire to raise the child in the fullness of the Catholic faith.

You may choose the extent to which you participate in your son’s baptism. Obviously, you would not make an affirmation of something you did not truly believe in. You can discuss this with the priest or deacon who will be performing the baptism during the formation period.

We will keep you and your family in prayer.

 

[cameron_lansing]

To elaborate, the introduction for the Rite of Baptism of Infants (n. 4) provides that: “A parent unable to make the profession of faith (for example, not being a Catholic) may keep silent. Such a parent, when making the request for the child’s baptism is asked only to make arrangements or at least to give permission for the child’s instruction in the faith of its baptism.”

But this and other adjustments as needed can be discussed with the priest.

 

[puzzleannie]

I think your own comfort level should determine how active you are. Obviously you should not say or do anything that conflicts with your own beliefs. But that does not prevent you from standing alongside your spouse, holding the baby, etc.

 

[Br.Rich_SFO]

Hello. I’m a “non-believer” married to a woman raised catholic. In the near future we are baptising our son in the Catholic Church. Lets presume my wife is in fact going to make an effort to introduce our son to catholicism but that I won’t be part of that effort.

I have (I hope) a simple question. What is the appropriate role for a non-catholic parent during a baptism that would be true to their own beliefs while also showing respect to the Catholic faith? Would it be considered inappropriate to take part in the ceremony but remain quiet during the question and answer bit? If so, how about attending but observing from the pews?

Ultimately I realize I should probably take this up with the priest performing the baptism. However I’d like to accumulate as much information as possible first as balancing my needs, my family’s needs, my in-laws needs and the churches requirements seems a somewhat delicate situation. Thank you for any suggestions.

You seem to not be opposed to your son being Baptized. You would of course be welcome at the Baptism and could most likely stand with your Catholic wife in presenting him for Baptism. You could remain quiet during the questions.