Are Large Families dysfunctional?

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I have a friend who is from a pretty dysfunctional family and is convinced it is because his parents had too many kids, 5. He thinks that large families cause mental maladjustment. Any psychological studies on this? My gut reaction is this isn’t true.
 
Because of his own experience, he is extrapolating that out to the entire world’s population?

:rolleyes:

Not an Einstein, is he…
 
Let’s see…In my family (ours and my Aunts and Uncles) families family sizes varied a bit…
3…5…6…4…2…5…8

I cannot say that I noted any correlation between size and level of dysfunction…

Not to say that we haven’t had our ups and downs, arguments, hurt feelings, not talking to each other, apologies, hugs, etc. etc. etc…

Of course maybe what I consider to be just normal kinds of things in any family of any size other people would consider “dysfunctional”…🤷

Peace
James
 
Five kids? I would consider that medium sized. Verging on large but not quite there yet. I am an only child and enjoyed Cheaper By the Dozen (the original books and movies, not the Steve Martin movies), the Sound of Music, etc. So to me “large” has to at least approach the double digits.

Tiny is an only child family. Small is 2 or 3 kids. Medium is 4-6. Etc. :twocents:

As for the dysfunction part, that can happen in any size family. Conversely, any size family can be blessed with happiness and peace. Dysfunctional vs. non-dysfunctional has more to do with the issues going on in the family.

If having 5 children caused poverty or lack of space . . . maybe there’s a higher risk of problems - but still it depends on the positive or negative coping skills of the parents and how the children are taught to treat each other. And whether there’s marital strife, alcoholism, or other problems like that.
 
I really don’t think so. Obviously the parent’s are busier and don’t get to spend quite as much time focusing on each child individually as say a family with 2 children, but dysfunctional? I think not. It would all depend on the parents and the children in that specific family. From what I’ve noticed, bigger families are better off than smaller ones,not necessarily financially, but they tend to be a lot less selfish/spoiled and more disciplined, and are more caring. But that could just be because larger families are more likely to hold traditional values.
 
Dysfunction is due to many complex factors. Family size, in my experience, is so far down on the list of contributing factors that it is non-existent. In fact, I’d venture to say that larger families are forced to make sacrifices for each other that smaller families don’t have to do.

Most dysfunctionalism is due, IMHO, to selfishness. It can exist anywhere (large or small families), but in larger families there’s more opportunity for self-giving and more easily functions.
 
Uh, no. I have met a large stable family. They’re prayerful, virtuous, and friendly.
 
Fr. Salanitro said that some studies have shown 96% of families are dysfunctional. (And they’re still looking for the normal 4%. :P) If his household is dysfunctional, he’s in good company, and it’s definitely not because the vast majority of households have 5+ kids. Not in America.

Speaking for myself: all my ma has in her household is herself, her son (me), and my sister. And we three are plenty dysfunctional just ourselves. Heck, if it were just the two of them - sis and mom - there’d be dysfunction aplenty between the two of 'em alone.
 
What constitutes “dysfunctional” for the purpose of our study here…

Peace
James
 
I’ve met plenty of people who are perfectly dysfunctional all by there lonesome…🤷
 
I know a lot of large families (8 or more children), and without exception, they are the most well-adjusted and fun families I know!

And I know quite a few small families (4 or less children), and several of them are in therapy for dysfunction (but not all–most are just fine!).

I just don’t think there is any correlation between size of family and functionality of family.
 
Kelfa28 said:
😉

It really is true.
You don’t need to be surrounded by a crowd of people to be dysfunctional. You can do it just fine by yourself.
Click to expand...
raises his hand

Poster child for lonely and mentally diseased here, if ever there was one!
 
chypmonk said:
I have a friend who is from a pretty dysfunctional family and is convinced it is because his parents had too many kids, 5. He thinks that large families cause mental maladjustment. Any psychological studies on this? My gut reaction is this isn’t true.
Click to expand...
Every large family I know is very stable, healthy, and just lovely to be in the company of.

Very likely, though, his parents were just unfit parents and having too many kids really was a problem for them. So the answer is that no, in principle they aren’t dysfunctional, but dysfunction may arise from having more children than a couple is capable of handling.
 
chypmonk said:
I have a friend who is from a pretty dysfunctional family and is convinced it is because his parents had too many kids, 5. He thinks that large families cause mental maladjustment. Any psychological studies on this? My gut reaction is this isn’t true.
Click to expand...
Sloots gonna sloot
 
chypmonk said:
I have a friend who is from a pretty dysfunctional family and is convinced it is because his parents had too many kids, 5. He thinks that large families cause mental maladjustment. Any psychological studies on this? My gut reaction is this isn’t true.
Click to expand...
Large families are not damaging, per se, not by any means, and I say that knowing people from families ranging in size from one child to sixteen. If your friend feels he has family-of-origin issues, he ought to see a counselor about it. If he chalks up emotional pain to something, then that something is worth a look.

OTOH, a large family is not guaranteed to be without its problems, either. If the parents don’t know how to practice and teach healthy communication and mutual care and the other aspects of a happy and healthy family life, then adding more children won’t cure that, not any more than having a child will cure an unhappy marriage.
 
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