Are people built up or pulled down on the Forum?

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Rob2

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A long time ago I read a reflection in a Columban Missionary magazine . I share some of it with you .

It reads : " It is only right that we should question our use of the social media . While not allowing it to consume all our time and turn us into addicts , we can ask ourselves if we use it simply to escape ourselves , to avoid boredom , or to build up an admiring group of followers . It need not be like this . We are “connectors” , people who want to bond with others , form relationships , develop friendships . Today , thanks to the gift of modern technology , we are able to link with others across the world and share ideas and skills to build up hope and bring peace . When we choose to use this wonderful gift for the good of others , to encourage them and not to pull them down , we become apostles of hope in this digital age . To choose otherwise is to quench the Spirit ."

" You cannot serve two masters , " Jesus said . If we spend an inordinate amount of time on social media , if we allow it to absorb us totally , whom are we following ? " Where your treasure is , there will your heart be also " .

When we find God in our clever digital tools , using them to build and to nourish , then we are indeed blessed and the Kingdom grows . "

I especially like that last bit…" When we find God in our clever digital tools , using them to build and to nourish , then we are indeed blessed and the Kingdom grows . "

Unfortunately there is both building up and pulling down on CAF .

I am not alone in noticing strong negativity , unkindness , and a degree of offensiveness in some posts .

I may have been guilty myself . If so , I apologise .

Don’t be bullied though . Stand up for the opinions you hold sincerely .

Let this be a place where we find God .
 
Amen Rob2!

Sometimes I find myself torn between two masters, ego and spirit, sometimes I succumb to ego and neglect my duties as a Christian, for that I apologise to anyone I may have hurt or annoyed.

A kind word is a gift without price or cost to the giver.

God bless us all this year and onwards.
🙏
 
I think the nature of a response varies from forum to forum on CAF. World news, social justice, and philosophy lend themselves to more of a debate than many of the other forums. There is nothing wrong with that either, if we do it with the understanding that it is simply a forum, and it should not be our life. It can be fun and entertaining, and maybe even healthy in some cases. It allows us to share our interests or beliefs with others as we might love talking about current events, problems n the church or family or any number of topics. The problem begins when a person is drawn along and before they know it are in a rage, or the other person is because someone doesn’t agree with us. Most people are guilty of that from time to time.

However, I see many posters who spend hours and hours on these forums. So many in fact, that I have to wonder what they do with the rest of their lives. I can’t even imagine there could be much time left , in some cases. I do understand that some people may be retired, bedridden, unemployed or any of a number of other reasons that would allow them to spend more time online, so I am compassionate to that. On the other hand, when we allow a social forum to become “our life” then then we miss out on what life really is. I think we need to involve ourselves in the real world. A social forum should only be a small part of our life. When we find ourselves in an angry defense mode about what someone we don’t know said and we exchange angry and attacking verbiage back and forth, we need to step back an examine ourselves.
 
Yes I noticed that on various forums. On a music forum I used to frequent there were people who posted all day long every day. For me the forum was a means to facilitate my love of music. For them the forum became the end itself. Some admitted all their time was spent discussing music that they no longer had any interest in actually listening to music anymore. I can’t speak for anyone’s posting habits on this forum. But for me I never want to get to the point on any forum where the the forum becomes an end in itself. The Bible and Bible commentary, the Catechism, the saint’s and theolgians writings are the ends. This forum is the means to enlighten me on certain points and direct me to areas of which I otherwise might not be aware.
 
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I think your statement-that the forum becomes “an end in itself” grasps a lot of what I was trying to say. In this type of situation is when it becomes a problem.
 
I think this forum is a great outlet to spread and proclaim the Gospel, something that I try to do in my daily life at college but between classes or off-times when I’m not busy I come here. I think the vast majority of questions can be answered from the direct words of Jesus in the Bible and I feel very honored to share that with anyone interested. In effect, every one of us who posts here partakes in the ministerial goals of Jesus in Matthew 12:18

”Here is my servant whom I have chosen, the one I love, in whom I delight; I will put my Spirit on him, and he will proclaim justice to the nations.”

As for other social media (since you are considering this forum social media), I don’t have any because it wastes my time imo
 
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@RandomAlias once posted the following which I thought was very helpful

‘If the Original Post reveals a spiritual need, ask yourself whether you can meet that need in charity. Do not give expression to your pride or fear (defensiveness). Charity alone!

If you have a response that can build faith, reveal hope, or strengthen love, put it out there.’

My emphasis.
 
Lee1 said:
If you have a response that can build faith, reveal hope, or strengthen love, put it out there.’
.
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If that quote , @Lee1 , was the motive of all for all posts how greatly would our spirituality be nourished .

When I got my laptop in 2008 I knew nothing of Catholic forums .

When I discovered them my purpose was to enrich my spirituality .

This forum has been the best so far for that . Others failed miserably .

Also I like the “fun threads” , posting music , photos , flowers , cartoons etc.
 
Rob2 said:
When I discovered them my purpose was to enrich my spirituality .
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Me too!
I found that this was the case at first but then the dynamics seemed to change for a while. I know we’re trying to be upbeat here but I’m sure everyone notices a few disturbances from time to time.

Hopefully the majority can sway things so that we do manage overall to gain spiritually and the negative aspects are kept to a minimum. I’m sure we can, there are many people of good will on the forum.

Thanks for the thread Rob, it’s a good thing to air this topic.

(Fun threads are good too.)
 
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Glad to say I’ve been built up in this forum.

Sure I get the occasionally aggressive post but most of the time, the exchanges have been genial.
 
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I definitely spend a bit too much time on here, but overall I think it’s been good for me. It has definitely helped me to come to a better understanding of Catholicism as I try to decide whether I need to convert.
 
I have noticed, since recently being absent at CAF for 7 months or so, that it is very easy to spend too much time on here. If we can honestly say that we have given enough time to prayer today, then that is definitely one thing we can check off our list, but if not, then a person is spending too much time on CAF.
 
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My prayer time actually increased when I started on this forum.

For me, sometimes I get distracted by the issues of life and being the only believer in my family, it is easy for me to put my faith on the back burner.

Being on this forum is the only chance I get to talk about my faith.
 
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Every Internet forum I’ve been on (probably 15-20 of them over the years) where people did not get to know each other in person always had people speculating why some people were “always on the forum”. There are a huge variety of reasons ranging from all sorts of health disabilities, to people who had a job that lent itself well to participating on forums and/or were just really good at multiplexing.

I’m spending a lot of time on this forum for the past year or two because it focuses on topics I find much more helpful and uplifting than the news forum I was spending time on for the year before that…and I was on that news forum because it was more friendly and kind than the news forum I was on the year before that…and I was on that previous news forum because the PhPbb I was on before that had a bit of a bullying/ clique problem…etc back through the years to 1997. I still manage to engage in a lot of non-Internet activities and have a pretty full life and a job.

If someone feels they are spending too much time on the forum, then it is time for a break. Assuming one is an adult and making their own decisions about use of their time, then this is best left to the individual circumstances and conscience.

If someone is spending too much time on the forum AND being disruptive, the odds are they will draw flags and eventually earn a “time out” from the mods, who are not shy about putting people in the penalty box.

As far as tearing people down or building people up, I think many issues could be solved if people just
  • did not call each other names and
  • were more open-minded and less judgmental.
To use one of the posts above as a charitable example, Jamal said,
If we can honestly say that we have given enough time to prayer today, then that is definitely one thing we can check off our list, but if not, then a person is spending too much time on CAF.
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which is fine.

But someone else might word it as, "That person is on here so much they can’t possibly have time to pray! What a hypocrite! " etc. This is obviously tearing someone down, especially since there is a whole prayer forum on here and it’s perfectly possible to be praying for intentions as they come up even if you don’t post the “I Prayed” comment on every thread.

I see a huge amount of judgment on this forum and it bothers me, but all I can do is try to not be that way myself. I’m sure I’m not perfect in that regard but I do try.
 
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I see this forum as my “focus group” as a cross section of Catholicism and seekers. It helps me be better in my work at a parish.
 
My ego tells me one thing, my spirit tells me another, I need my spirit to win these contests so …

Please accept my apology if what I said the other day upset you, I am an ignorant man and sometimes I choose my words poorly and follow my emotions, not a good combination. Sorry.
 
Apology accepted.

You are not “ignorant”, you like me had a recent death. (I also had a good friend whose death I learned about Christmas Eve).
Sometimes it affects perspective.

I am in turn sorry for the upset response I made to you in the thread. The mods pulled both our posts, and that was fully appropriate in view of the TOS.

I read your thread later after many others had posted in it, and I think the whole business stemmed from a misunderstanding because it seemed like you were focused more on the situation of voluntary suffering and not on those sufferings we cannot escape in life (illnesses we didn’t bring on ourselves, deaths, etc)

By the way, when I have a situation with someone on here I usually pray for them, so you were in my prayers. I understand that this is God’s way of getting me to pray for the person.

So, let us go forward, together.

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One of the best things about CAF is that it gives a member here the opportunity to practice every single Spiritual Work of Mercy- perhaps all in one visit!

1. To instruct the ignorant.
2. To counsel the doubtful.
3. To admonish the sinners.
4. To bear patiently those who wrong us.
5. To forgive offenses.
6. To comfort the afflicted.
7. To pray for the living and the dead
 
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