Are some sins unforgiveable?

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KittenUK

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I am a relatively new Catholic, having been received into the Church in May 2008, previous to this I’d spent 7 years practising witchcraft - so a big leap for me! My faith has become extremely important to me, and I’m now tearing myself apart over something hideously terrible that I’ve done.

I slept with a married man. He’s an ex-boyfriend, and it’s undeniable that there’s always been a huge sexual chemistry between us. Recently, we met up again after some time, and it was evident that the chemistry was still there. He made it very clear he would like to sleep with me again, and I was adamant that it wasn’t going to happen. Over a period of a few months, he’s been pushing the subject again and again, it felt like he was trying to wear me down, and he kept saying “let’s just do it and get it out of our system”. Eventually, yesterday, I gave in. I don’t know what came over me - it’s so out of character for me and goes against all my beliefs. It was as though my brain had flicked a switch and made me incapable of rational thought. To think of it now makes me physically sick.

I’ve been through a lot of upheaval and been extremely vulnerable over the last 10 months. I’m on medication for depression and anxiety and have had some intensive counselling. I thought I wasn’t so vulnerable anymore, but I think I’m still in the process of building myself up. I know this isn’t an excuse, but it’s a big ego boost to someone with such low self esteem as myself, to know that someone finds you attractive and wants you.

I regret my actions so very much, I can’t express how much. I’ve made an appointment to see my priest for Confession, and I plan to e-mail the man in question and tell him it was a mistake, it will never happen again and that we should keep our distance from each other - which is what I should have done in the first place, but I was too bloody stupid.

My biggest worry is this - can I be forgiven? If I make an honest, contrite confessions as I intend to, can I receive absolution? I’m really scared that my priest will tell me I’m just too bad to be forgiven, and that breaks my heart. I am a stupid, ignorant, foolish girl and I need some help from someone.
 
KittenUK said:
My biggest worry is this - can I be forgiven? If I make an honest, contrite confessions as I intend to, can I receive absolution? I’m really scared that my priest will tell me I’m just too bad to be forgiven, and that breaks my heart. I am a stupid, ignorant, foolish girl and I need some help from someone.
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Any sin you repent of will be absolved in confession. Only way you can be “too bad to be forgiven” is when you do not repent, have no contrition or have no willingness to change your behavior.
 
Thank you for your response, you have helped to put my mind at ease. I am certainly repentant and willing to change. I am seeing my priest this evening. Thank you so much for your help. Please pray for me. God bless you.
 
xformer7 is correct. The only “unforgiveable sin” is the one you do not repent of. See the Catechism of the Catholic Church: CCC 1864. In part, it reads: “There are no limits to the mercy of God, but anyone who deliberately refuses to accept his mercy by repenting, rejects the forgiveness of his sins and the salvation offered by the Holy Spirit.”

A priest told me a very insightful thing in Confession once. In regards to temptation and sin, he said that, before we sin, we ought to focus on God’s judgment. After we sin, we ought to focus on God’s infinite mercy. Satan tries to get us to do the opposite. Satan wants us to think only of God’s mercy before we sin, because then we think, “Oh, I can sin and God will still forgive me.” And then, after we sin, Satan wants us to think only of God’s just judgment, which causes us to despair. Don’t let this happen to you!

We’re praying for you! :grouphug:
 
KittenUK said:
I. He made it very clear he would like to sleep with me again, and I was adamant that it wasn’t going to happen. Over a period of a few months, he’s been pushing the subject again and again, it felt like he was trying to wear me down,
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there is your first mistake, letting him back into your life, and your second mistake, letting him stay in your life, it sounds as if you set yourself up for failure. no there is no unforgiveable sin, excep to to refuse repentance and forgiveness. You know the answer, you don’t need to ask. Go to confession to any priest, be absolved, make a good act of contrition, do penance, and resolve not to sin again, and remove yourself from “the near occasion of sin” in the good old-fashioned phrase. That means avoid people and situations that set you up for temptation. Why not get this advice from a priest in confession instead of from strangers? There you encounter Jesus, here you encounter just good wishes and prayers, which is great, but not what you need now.

the most amazing thing a new Catholic comes to realize, in the months after her reception, is the grace of penance–after all, when Jesus came the first thing he proclaimed was forgiveness of sin, because that is the key and requisite for all other graces he offers. Would you refuse to go to the doctor if you had medical symptoms because he might judge you? Jesus came to heal the sick so go to him, now.
 
We’re all sinners and we all falter. You realize what you did was very wrong and you want to return to God. That’s what confession is all about 🙂

Believe me, God will forgive you. Even if you committed the most unspeakable acts, even if you committed every sin since Adam, God would still forgive you. As for the Priest, in my experience they’re very gentle. I’ve never ever had a Priest say something mean to me in confession - harsh and honest advice sometimes, yes, but never meanness. Even if a Priest IS mean to you, which is very unlikely, so what? Remember it’s not the Priest who forgives your sins but God.

If you’re really embarrassed to the point where you can’t work up the strength to go to confession it’d probably be better to have an anonymous confession at another parish than to put off the sacrament, but remember my signature . . .
 
puzzleannie said:
there is your first mistake, letting him back into your life, and your second mistake, letting him stay in your life, it sounds as if you set yourself up for failure. no there is no unforgiveable sin, excep to to refuse repentance and forgiveness. You know the answer, you don’t need to ask. Go to confession to any priest, be absolved, make a good act of contrition, do penance, and resolve not to sin again, and remove yourself from “the near occasion of sin” in the good old-fashioned phrase. That means avoid people and situations that set you up for temptation. Why not get this advice from a priest in confession instead of from strangers? There you encounter Jesus, here you encounter just good wishes and prayers, which is great, but not what you need now.
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Believe me, I realise what a mistake I made - I naively thought we could just be friends without all the complicated stuff that goes with it. Obviously, I was wrong, and will be drawing a line under that particular friendship and moving on.

I AM going to a priest for a full confession. The only reason I posted on here was because I was so concerned I’d committed an unforgiveable sin and would not be absolved. I wanted reassurance that I would be - which thanks to the kind and knowledgeable people on this forum, I have received.

I am going to my parish priest for confession - it will be embarrassing and shameful, but he knows me really well, and I think I’d actually prefer to talk to him than to a stranger. I also prefer face-to-face confession, and that would be a bit more difficult with a stranger too. He’s very understanding, thankfully.

Thank you all for your responses, your good wishes and your prayers. You are lovely people, and you have really helped put my mind at ease. I even feel less anxious about going to confession now - I can imagine the sense of relief I will feel afterwards, and the incredible feeling of being back with God. Thank you all and God bless you.
 
I managed to see my priest today. Unfortunately, it was the first available opportunity, which meant waiting for him after Mass - so I couldn’t take Communion this morning. I spent about an hour with him, and he was very understanding (admitted he was disappointed, but I’d expected that) and he was so lovely and helpful. He has given me absolution, and I feel like a huge weight has been lifted from my shoulders. I am so glad I went to him and not to a stranger, because he knows me really well, and knows about my personal history, so he could give me specific advice pertaining to that. But I am back with God, and going to go to daily Mass tomorrow, so that I can take Communion, knowing that my sins have been forgiven. Thank you again for all your advice and kinds words. God bless.
 
KittenUK said:
I am a relatively new Catholic, having been received into the Church in May 2008, previous to this I’d spent 7 years practising witchcraft - so a big leap for me! My faith has become extremely important to me, and I’m now tearing myself apart over something hideously terrible that I’ve done.

I slept with a married man. He’s an ex-boyfriend, and it’s undeniable that there’s always been a huge sexual chemistry between us. Recently, we met up again after some time, and it was evident that the chemistry was still there. He made it very clear he would like to sleep with me again, and I was adamant that it wasn’t going to happen. Over a period of a few months, he’s been pushing the subject again and again, it felt like he was trying to wear me down, and he kept saying “let’s just do it and get it out of our system”. Eventually, yesterday, I gave in. I don’t know what came over me - it’s so out of character for me and goes against all my beliefs. It was as though my brain had flicked a switch and made me incapable of rational thought. To think of it now makes me physically sick.

I’ve been through a lot of upheaval and been extremely vulnerable over the last 10 months. I’m on medication for depression and anxiety and have had some intensive counselling. I thought I wasn’t so vulnerable anymore, but I think I’m still in the process of building myself up. I know this isn’t an excuse, but it’s a big ego boost to someone with such low self esteem as myself, to know that someone finds you attractive and wants you.

I regret my actions so very much, I can’t express how much. I’ve made an appointment to see my priest for Confession, and I plan to e-mail the man in question and tell him it was a mistake, it will never happen again and that we should keep our distance from each other - which is what I should have done in the first place, but I was too bloody stupid.

My biggest worry is this - can I be forgiven? If I make an honest, contrite confessions as I intend to, can I receive absolution? I’m really scared that my priest will tell me I’m just too bad to be forgiven, and that breaks my heart. ** I am a stupid, ignorant, foolish girl and I need some help from someone.**
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Insert (guy, man, woman, child) here, and you pretty much can describe us all.

This sin is forgivable; the only one that isn’t is apostasy, or giving up the faith (permanently).
 
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