Are you a housewife?

[GreyRabbit]

Is there even such a thing anymore?

Well anyway, if there is, what do you do as a housewife? Are you worried about your husband being the only one bringin in the paycheck? Do you like it? Do you have a small side job? Is it worth it?

chuckles I guess you could say I’m gatherin research from those who’d know best. Hope no one minds!

 

[CatholicSam]

I’m a housewife!

No, I’m not worried that my husband is the only one earning a pay check. He has a good, secure job, and if for some reason he had to find a new job, there are plenty of such jobs within driving distance of our house. And if something happened to his working ability, I could get a decent paying job myself (I’m an RN and have been keeping up with my license).

I think it is absolutely worth it! I couldn’t imagine the stress in our lives, raising our 2 toddlers (and hopefully more in the future), if I had to go out into the workforce and put the kids in daycare. In fact, I believe that me going to work would be a MUCH bigger sacrifice than living on one income and playing with my children and caring for my family and home all day long!

 

[monicatholic]

I’m not a housewife. I’m my husband’s wife and my kids’ mother. Homemaker is the better word for what I do. Homemaker and homeschool mom.

My husband brings home the primary income and I scrape up a pittance doing minimal hours of daycare and a few other small impact things.

Is it worth it?

Yes. Very much worth it.

My husband’s blue collar income is hardly adequate, but we rely very heavily on God’s grace to raise the seven of our ten children still at home.

My husband shoulders most of the burden, so the bigger question is really, “is it worth it to him?” He insists the answer is yes. He’s very grateful that his kids are home and happy and safe. He’s very grateful that I love my vocation.

 

[surfinpure]

Is there even such a thing anymore?

Well anyway, if there is, what do you do as a housewife? Are you worried about your husband being the only one bringin in the paycheck? Do you like it? Do you have a small side job? Is it worth it?

chuckles I guess you could say I’m gatherin research from those who’d know best. Hope no one minds!

Yup, I’m a housewife. I care for our 2 kids (soon to be 3), do laundry, dishes, cleaning, organizing, and anything else that needs to be taken care of. Not at all worried about my husband being the sole provider – he’s very good at it! I love my job. I don’t work on the side, though sometimes I watch a niece for pay. It’s 100% worth it.

 

[CatholicSam]

I’m not a housewife. I’m my husband’s wife and my kids’ mother. Homemaker is the better word for what I do. Homemaker and homeschool mom.

That’s funny, I like housewife better than homemaker To me, homemaker and SAHM are the “modern” and feminist versions. I like the good old fashioned, 1950’s housewife. Unfortunately today it’s considered a derrogatory word by many The only time we hear it is when someone is talking about the name of that stupid show. Sigh…

I write “housewife” on anything that asks for my occupation

 

[blossom02]

I was thinking of the term housewife and wondering what happened to it. I think that those that call themselves stay at home moms are putting the children above the husband. It is the feminist or politically correct way of getting around those who would be offended.

I think more house wifes would be a great benifit to society.

I have been reading a book called “Mini farming for self sufficiency” by Brett L. Markham he has a lot of good ideas that a wife could use to suppliment their husbands income. He shows how to grow and preserve family healthy food (85%) and or sell it and other things in just about any size peice of ground (1/4 acre) and earn 10,000 annually.
markhamfarm.com/index.php?option=com_content&task=view&id=19&Itemid=26

I think a person could do as much of this type of thing as they wanted or are able.

 

[BeluvdLily]

I am a housewife and proud to be one! For so many years I was a divorced, single mom (due to ex’s alcoholism and physical abuse) and I would have given anything to be home with my son. It killed me to leave him.

I am sooo thankful to be home now. While my husband is over-the-road truck driver and my son is 20 years old (but still at home), I am still glad to be able to be available to them and to focus on home and family. It’s really all I ever wanted to be.

I also think society would greatly benefit from more women being home. My husband and I just feel that it is the natural way of things. I also think that there would be more/better paying jobs for the men who work and our children would know they were loved and be better supervised.

I do have a part-time job for the summer as pool monitor in the community where we live. Unfortunately I have had to do occasional temp work and PT work to help with finances but never for long. I plan to work harder on my writing to make extra money. I have had some things published and feel that way I can still be home and have my focus where it needs to be.

I am not at all ashamed of the word housewife and feel no need to be a homemaker or SAHM or whatever.

Amie

 

[kind_bean]

I am a housewife, and I don’t have a problem with that term, although I generally do use the term “homemaker” simply because it makes more sense to me. I am not married to my house, but I do make it a home.

The bulk of my time is caring for my 13 month dd and I will be having our second child in late October. The rest of the time I do all the shopping, cleaning, and most of the cooking (I am a vegetarian and my husband isn’t, so he has to cook his own meat if he wants it). I quit my job just before giving birth to my dd in June of last year. I don’t have any part time or side jobs, although I am working on making crafts and hoping to sell them in the future (but that is probably a couple of years down the road).

I do worry about money and it certainly is the biggest source of stress in our lives. My husband is a RN and makes good money, but our state is really expensive and we are barely getting by. He is hardly home because he works so much (he is also trying to start a business, which takes up most of his time while at home). I have offered to find a job, but there isn’t much out there (even with a college degree) and even if I did get a job, I would have to put our dd in daycare and I probably wouldn’t make enough to make it worth putting her in there. So, we have decided that unless things get worse, we are sticking to our plan (me staying at home and him working). We are putting a lot of hope into this business, which will hopefully allow my husband more time home and more money, but we also know that if that does happen, it will probably take at least a year or two. For now, we just make do with what we have and try not to buy needless things.

I love being able to stay home with my dd and I feel horrible for my sister who has to work and leave her dd with our mom. She cries all the time and just wishes she can stay home, so I am very blessed. And my husband is wonderful, because he works very hard, because he believes it is what is best for our children (them being able to stay home with their mother). So, yes, I would say it is worth it. You get to see all the little and big moments that you would miss if they were in daycare. I simply can’t imagine having to give my dd up for hours a day. I think it would be horrible.

 

[Feanaro_s_Wife]

**Seems like most of the women who answered yes are all moms as well. The first thing that pops into my head when I hear (or read) the term “housewife” is a wife who stays home but does not have kids to care for… probably because the term stay at home mom is so popular right now.

House-wife: wife who stays in the house
SAHM: mom who stays in the house


Honestly I don’t really like any of those terms… what about “domestic engineer”?
**

 

[GreyRabbit]

Thank you for all your replies! I do appreciate it! I’ve just one more question if no one minds, in reading one of your posts I thought of it:

Since the father has to work, I guess I’m assuming it’s an all day job sort of thing, does that impact the kids at all? I mean, is there any “resentment” that he’s not at home? Is that asking for too much, or not being fair? I guess I’m wondering if the dad would feel sad about not being able to be at home much cuz he’s working a lot. Does that make sense? laughs I s’pose that’s not really one question is it? Xp

 

[BeeSweet]

That’s funny, I like housewife better than homemaker To me, homemaker and SAHM are the “modern” and feminist versions. I like the good old fashioned, 1950’s housewife. Unfortunately today it’s considered a derrogatory word by many The only time we hear it is when someone is talking about the name of that stupid show. Sigh…

I write “housewife” on anything that asks for my occupation

That’s funny. I never thought being a stay at home mom would count me as a liberated woman.

The term housewife makes me feel like a hamster. I’m a wife whether I’m in the house or not. Not that I feel insulted by the term necessarily, I don’t know that I’ve been called that yet. But when asked, I say I’m a stay at home mom. I guess because the only reason I stay at home is because I’m now a mom.

Well anyway, if there is, what do you do as a housewife?

I cook a lot, and I do a lot of laundry and dishes (although there’s always more of that I can do). I chase the toddler and hold him down to hose him off occasionally. I listen to a lot of Elmo.

Are you worried about your husband being the only one bringin in the paycheck?

No. I grew up in a single income household. And I’m not worried about myself finding work if and when it comes to that again.

Do you like it?

Just like any job, some of it I do well and some of it I struggle.

Do you have a small side job?

Does keeping my patience count? That really is a job in itself some days. I am back in school, but that won’t pan out for a few years. Hopefully I’ll be able to work from home, that’s the big plan.

Is it worth it?

Yes.

 

[BeeSweet]

Thank you for all your replies! I do appreciate it! I’ve just one more question if no one minds, in reading one of your posts I thought of it:

Since the father has to work, I guess I’m assuming it’s an all day job sort of thing, does that impact the kids at all? I mean, is there any “resentment” that he’s not at home? Is that asking for too much, or not being fair? I guess I’m wondering if the dad would feel sad about not being able to be at home much cuz he’s working a lot. Does that make sense? laughs I s’pose that’s not really one question is it? Xp

I have some resentment that I have to curb when he walks in the door. He’s just got off work and needs to decompress. I’ve been working all day and would like a break, but I have to get dinner ready. It’s a struggle for me sometimes to curb myself and not be selfish. I look forward to him getting home so I can have a break. But he also looks forward to getting home so he can have a break.

It’s real hard for him that our son has a fit when he leaves. I worked in day care for several years when I was a teen, and I saw it happen a lot with children and their parents when they didn’t get to see them much. Our son could care less if I come and go. No tears if mommy leaves. But with Daddy, you’d think he was never going to see the man again. And I guess in a toddler’s world, not seeing a person again till the next evening is an awful long time. The toddler does the same thing with my best girlfriend when she leaves, he has a fit like she’ll never return.

It makes up for the resentment to know that my son is so confident that I’ll always be there he never fears me leaving. I’m very rarely ever away from him for more than a few hours at a time. I can’t help but wonder though if he likes me though. But I know he must, because he gives hugs and kisses to everyone, and I’m the one who taught him how.

 

[Claymont79]

I am a Housewife, Homeschooling Mom, Grandma, Foster Mom, & Landlord for a couple rental properties (my contribution to our retirement fund) and I love my vocation which seems to encompass all the above titles.

I’m not stuck on any portion of the name thing. Although I am NOT a SAHM, I work hard to keep our lives pleasant.

Yes it sometimes bothers me that I don’t bring home a paycheck anymore, but I so love what I do and where I am at this point that it’s always a fleeting thing since I could get a job when I wanted one. My DH sometimes resents it, since he stayed home (and homeschooled 4 of the 7 then at home) for 4 years while I worked, but I ended up doing almost everything at home too so told him it was his turn to go back to work so I could keep up without killing myself.

 

[monicatholic]

First, I’m not sorry for eschewing the term “housewife.” As I’d written before-- I’m not married to our house. I also don’t call myself a SAHM because I think it sounds reactionary to the work-away moms.

My vocation is wife and mother. That’s all the terminology I need.

Since the father has to work, I guess I’m assuming it’s an all day job sort of thing, does that impact the kids at all? I mean, is there any “resentment” that he’s not at home? Is that asking for too much, or not being fair? I guess I’m wondering if the dad would feel sad about not being able to be at home much cuz he’s working.

My husband works a weekly swing shift-- a 7 day week of day shift, 7 day week of afternoon shift, 7 day week of midnight shift, then starts it all over again. He’s been at it 22 years. ( It’s inhumane and detrimental to the health of the workers, but I’ll stay off the soap box for now.)

There have been some interesting advantages, though. Our family has adjusted to his schedule fairly well. Our homeschooled and little kids get to spend mornings with their dad when he’s on afternoon shift. They get lots of studying done when dad is on midnight shift because everyone has to be quiet throughout the day while he’s sleeping. THey miss him when he’s at work, but they don’t balk at the value of our traditional gender roles.

Our family has been consecrated to the Sacred Heart of Jesus. A promise of devotion to the Sacred Heart is to receive the graces needed to persevere in one’s station in life. We experience those graces daily. Whatever envy any of us may experience over the others’ perceived freedoms is helped, corrected and healed by those graces.

 

[Cadbury]

I guess you would call me a housewife. To be honest I don’t like the sound of it. Nor do I like SAHM. It sounds like I don’t do anything all day. Plus when you are talking to other moms on the playground and you identify yourself as such immediately half of them (the working half) want nothing to do with you. So when anyone asks what I do I say I am a domestic terd herder. It makes them laugh. Because whether you go to work or you stay home chances are if you are a women you’re still stuck scrubbing the toliet and changing the diapers (at least most of the time.)
Anyway no I don’t worry about husband being the sole provider. He brings home a good paycheck and if he lost this job then we’d pack up and move to go find another. We’ve done it before. Even with three kids 4 yrs and under this doesn’t phaze me a bit. Besides at this point even if I had a job I’d have to quit because no job I could land would ever pay enough for three kids in daycare plus all the taxes!

 

[deanarrca]

Absolutely and loving it. But I have done it all, I have been the working mom (Special Ed Teacher), The work at home mom (Ran a Family Day Care in my home). Now I don’t even work part time. My kids are older College, High School (Special Needs Class) and Middle School, and I don’t home school. So What do I do? - I run the home. The Shopping, The Cooking (I love to cook) The Cleaning (Don’t love so much) The scheduling, The Bill Paying, and Family Taxi. I help out with the Special Needs Ministry at Church and now that I am an official Catholic I hope to do more. Because I can take care of what needs to be done during the week, we have leisure time to do things as a family on the weekend. Back when I was a working mom, the weekend was catch up time to get done what we could not get done during the week. I had time to be my sons Cub Scout Den mother for 5 years because nobody else would take on the responsibility. I can be the mom who gets to chaperone the school field trips. I am home in the afternoons and I always have extra kids over here. My house is the hang out house.

Finances In the beginning were tight.- Now our house is paid for our cars and boat are paid for. Hubby has a steady job, he is an engineer and Plant Manager. Not too worried, I could always go back to teaching if I wanted and needed too.

You do what you have to in the stage of life that your in, this is simply the stage in our lives now that we can do this and it works for us.
Deeny

 

[surfinpure]

Seems like most of the women who answered yes are all moms as well. The first thing that pops into my head when I hear (or read) the term “housewife” is a wife who stays home but does not have kids to care for… probably because the term stay at home mom is so popular right now.

House-wife: wife who stays in the house
SAHM: mom who stays in the house


Honestly I don’t really like any of those terms… what about “domestic engineer”?

I’ve had fun confusing a few people with “domestic engineer.”

But I don’t have a problem with housewife. And I imagine back when the term originated, children were presumed.

 

[surfinpure]

Thank you for all your replies! I do appreciate it! I’ve just one more question if no one minds, in reading one of your posts I thought of it:

Since the father has to work, I guess I’m assuming it’s an all day job sort of thing, does that impact the kids at all? I mean, is there any “resentment” that he’s not at home? Is that asking for too much, or not being fair? I guess I’m wondering if the dad would feel sad about not being able to be at home much cuz he’s working a lot. Does that make sense? laughs I s’pose that’s not really one question is it? Xp

My husband has no resentment about working during the day, and I have no resentment about staying home. We both feel strongly that this is the best of all possible models to follow. When he is at home, he spends a good deal of time with the children, and I get to rest. The children understand that Daddy goes to work and comes home later on, and they have yet to be upset by this.

 

[Feedmysheep]

Since the father has to work, I guess I’m assuming it’s an all day job sort of thing, does that impact the kids at all? I mean, is there any “resentment” that he’s not at home?

My DH works afternoons, from 3 pm until 2 am. He normally is up by 9 or 10, and able to spend 4-5 prime, daytime hours with the children.
We homeschool, so on “good” days, we’ve got the lion’s share of school finished by the time DH is up, so the children get to spend a larger amount of time with him under this schedule than when he worked the 9-5 shift.

Is that asking for too much, or not being fair? I guess I’m wondering if the dad would feel sad about not being able to be at home much cuz he’s working a lot. Does that make sense? laughs I s’pose that’s not really one question is it? Xp

I think that any loving father would like to spend as much time with his children as possible. I know that my DH much prefers the afternoon shift precisely because it does afford him more time with the family, in terms of quality AND quantity. However, because I stay home with the kids (homemaker, housewife, SAHM, domestic engineer, whatever you want to call it, I have no quibbles with any of those labels or their connotations) he DOES get the peace of mind knowing that his children are with the person he trusts most in this world.
When I used to work, and was miserable about it, he not only felt stress over our children’s welfare away from home, but also my mental state. Now, although he’s the sole breadwinner, he doesn’t mind the added responsibility, because the home he comes, well, home to is so much more peaceful than it used to be.

 

[Jennifer_J]

**Seems like most of the women who answered yes are all moms as well. The first thing that pops into my head when I hear (or read) the term “housewife” is a wife who stays home but does not have kids to care for… probably because the term stay at home mom is so popular right now.

House-wife: wife who stays in the house
SAHM: mom who stays in the house


Honestly I don’t really like any of those terms… what about “domestic engineer”?
**

I had the same thoughts with about the OP…for some reason “housewife” says there are no children and “homemaker” or “SAHM” means children I don’t know why, though.

I like “domestic engineer”