One of the key reasons we keep losing this debate is because christians in this country already are using a fatally flawed definition of marriage. Look around at our culture today and see it. Marriage is unconsciously defined thus: “Marriage is the union of a man and woman who love each other, wish to celebrate that love they feel for each other publicly and seek to make that love last for the rest of their lives.”
This definition is so shallow that there really ISN’T any compelling reason to limit it to a man and woman. Why NOT apply it to two men? Opposing such a change indeed seems mean spirited and cruel.
But how did we get such a lousy definition of marriage? Marriage once meant lot more than that. Once, it was “Marriage is the loving, self-sacrificial union of a man and woman who give their very selves to one another in a union so self giving in nature that, like the God in whom we are created in the image of, it is ordered towards the creation and nurturing of new life.”
See the difference? Government didn’t get involved in marriage because people like it or have some ‘right’ to it. They got involved originally out of a recognition that marriage is the foundation civilization is built on. Without it (the real kind), our culture can’t be sustained, we slowly lapse into a selfish savagery. Notice any of THAT lately?
In short, we need to stop defending bad definitions of marriage and start defending the real thing. But to do so, we need to start living the real thing, which means seeing children as a blessing rather than a burden. As long as christians live out the shallow definition of marriage, the culture will see through us. We’ll turn the tide when WE start living the deeper meaning of marriage and the rotten fruit of the larger culture’s degenerated version of marriage becomes undeniable.