As a Catholic: Do you feel you know your "sexual identity"?

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on_the_hill said:
Thank you. That’s a help. But I also meant I don’t know what it means to know my sexual identity.

I know I’m a man. I know I like women. I like most manly things and dislike most womanly things, but I don’t like all manly things and do like some womanly things.

I’ve never been hunting, and I do like to bake once in a while. I don’t leave dirty socks laying around, but I do think “Dumb & Dumber” is a funny movie. :confused:
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Expressing the unique gifts God gave you within the context of being man does not have a lot to do with what hobbies you pursue, what entertainment you like, or what faults you have as a roommate. Monastic communities, after all, sometimes make their living by baking holiday fruit cakes, and without ever forming hunting parties.

If you go to a monastery, however, it is different than a convent. Catholic women in community have different communities than Catholic men in community. Your friendships with women will have a different character than your friendships with other men, whether or not you share interests such as baking or don’t share interests such as hunting.

This is not something we ought to make into something hard. It is not hard; it is just being yourself and accepting that your life has a particular character that it would not have if you had been born with the opposite gender. I suppose it is a matter of being willing to accept ourselves, to know that, for instance, your interest in women has a fundamentally different character because you are a man and not a woman.
 
I am going to say something that may bring on negative comments:

I engage in my sexuality and my attraction to women. I flirt with women on a regular basis. And I think flirting is perfectly acceptable so long as it is done in ways that are aligned with chastity.

These are the things I was referring to when I was commenting on the workings of our individual sexuality.

Joshua C.
 
joshvanrad said:
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I engage in my sexuality and my attraction to women. I flirt with women on a regular basis. And I think flirting is perfectly acceptable so long as it is done in ways that are aligned with chastity.

These are the things I was referring to when I was commenting on the workings of our individual sexuality.

Joshua C.
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I see no reason to find fault with that, assuming you are single.
 
EasterJoy said:
Expressing the unique gifts God gave you within the context of being man does not have a lot to do with what hobbies you pursue, what entertainment you like, or what faults you have as a roommate. Monastic communities, after all, sometimes make their living by baking holiday fruit cakes, and without ever forming hunting parties.

If you go to a monastery, however, it is different than a convent. Catholic women in community have different communities than Catholic men in community. Your friendships with women will have a different character than your friendships with other men, whether or not you share interests such as baking or don’t share interests such as hunting.

This is not something we ought to make into something hard. It is not hard; it is just being yourself and accepting that your life has a particular character that it would not have if you had been born with the opposite gender. I suppose it is a matter of being willing to accept ourselves, to know that, for instance, your interest in women has a fundamentally different character because you are a man and not a woman.
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In that case, yes. I’m completely at home with my sexual identity.
 
As for the title question: Uh… I’m female! I’ve got that figured out! 😃

Other than that, not really, no. But I think that’s par for the course, when it comes to teenagers (and especially considering my background). I’m learning more about myself and others all the time, so hopefully I’ll figure out what exactly it means to be a woman as I go. 😃
 
estesbob said:
Let me put this delicately-that is disrespecting your wife.
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Flirting can easily cross the line into disrespect, married or not, but I would not presume that is what he means.

What qualifies as “flirting” to some men would to others merely qualify as acknowledging that a woman better exemplifies feminine charm than her husband does. They do not necessarily mean the kind of behavior that would embarrass anyone if they were to do the same in the presence of both their wives and their mothers and every male in the woman’s family.
 
estesbob said:
Let me put this delicately-that is disrespecting your wife.
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Well, I guess it depends on what your definition of flirting is. And I don’t do anything scandalous.

My guess is that my wife does it, too.

And it’s not always a bad thing. A secretary at work used to flirt with the HVAC guy. They thought she had a crush on him. She did it so he’d turn up the thermostat when it got too cold.
 
on_the_hill said:
Well, I guess it depends on what your definition of flirting is. And I don’t do anything scandalous.

My guess is that my wife does it, too.

And it’s not always a bad thing. A secretary at work used to flirt with the HVAC guy. They thought she had a crush on him. She did it so he’d turn up the thermostat when it got too cold.
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Lol you’re so weird!
 
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