..as we forgive those

[steve99]

I’ve been pondering this whole thing of forgiveness.
What do we mean by forgiveness?

We seem to use the term “forgive” in two totally different contexts.

The first I’ll call psychological, as espoused by the definition used by Fr. Jim McManus who writes and talks on the topic of forgiveness, “the willingness to abandon one’s right to resentment, negative judgement and indifferent behaviour toward one who unjustly injured us, while fostering the undeserved qualities of compassion, generosity, and even love toward him.”
This is about our mental health because holding on to feelings of anger, bitterness etc will eat us up. But according to Fr. McManus this kind of forgiving doesn’t mean we act as if no offence has been committed and that we retain the right to seek retribution by the appropriate authorities.

The other context of forgiveness is juridical. Then the concepts are guilt & punishment. These are the two liabilities that Karl Keating mentions is his “Primer on Indulgences” tract.
This seems to be the way we view forgiveness of sins. In this God does seem to put aside the offence and retribution (or rather Jesus has already paid it.)

When we pray “forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those that trespass against us” are we using forgiveness in two different ways?

If so then how can we ask God to forgive us as we forgive others if we are using different meanings to forgiveness?

Then again are we required to forgive others unconditionally? Some people say yes, others no.

Does God forgive us unconditionally?

Finally where do repentance and restitution come in?

I’m particularly interested in this from the aspect of forgiving others (hence the title of the thread.

P.S. I’m sure this must have come up before so if anyone can point me to a thread that covers this please do so.

 

[suissemissed]

While God removes the eternal punishment due to our sins, He doesn’t always remove the temporary (or “chastising”) punishment. For instance, when David sinned by committing adultery with Bathsheba, God (speaking through the prophet Nathan), told David that his sins had been forgiven *, yet he would still be chastised for his sins by the loss of his baby, among other things. Also, the Church teaches that sins committed after baptism still have temporal punishment (“chastisement”) due for them, which must either be expiated on earth (by penance or indulgence), or in Purgatory.

Thus, forgiveness doesn’t always involve a complete removal of penalties. When parents punish their children for misbehaving, are they then guilty of not forgiving them? (and remember, as Christians we must always forgive, see Matthew 6:14-15). The answer is no. The punishment inflicted by the parents is not done out of vengeance, but for the good of the child. In a similar way, if a husband is abusive/unfaithful towards his wife, the wife may separate from him for her own good, though she should do her best to forgive him in her heart. Bitterness is never a good thing, though punishment isn’t always about bitterness.

I hope that answer helps Basically, we must always forgive in our hearts, but that doesn’t mean consequences (provided they aren’t done out of bitterness/vengeance) aren’t still necessary.*