Ask a Priest Anything...about Confession!

[Annie]

I realized that the more I learned the less I worried, which makes sense.

I guess this is the difference between you and someone who is scrupulous: the more they learn, the more they worry!

 

[Weave]

I’ve stood in lines at confessions where some penitents are in the confessional for well over 20 minutes. My confessions tend to last around the 2-3 minute mark. Is there a reason confession should take so long? If somebody needed that much time would it be more appropriate to schedule a time outside of the standard confession times?

 

[amazingcatholic]

If someone told you that they were too scared to go to confession, what would you say?

 

[HeDa]

Do you have some preferred books or other reading material that could be good for us to read? Simple language to more advanced, shorter - longer etc.

 

[OKComputer]

Thank you Father, and God bless you for doing this. You have no idea the amount of good you do by having threads like this.

 

[Anna5]

Thank you very much for answering all our questions, Father! I have a question as well: you said you prefer confession to be done anonymously. Why do you prefer this?
I always thought it is best to have a regular confessor, a priest who get to know the penitent well and therefore can give better advice. Do you think is is a good idea if the confessor and spiritual director are the same person?

 

[edward_george1]

Is there a reason confession should take so long?

Sometimes there is, and it’s best to just pray for the person and not dwell on it.

If somebody needed that much time would it be more appropriate to schedule a time outside of the standard confession times?

It might be, but things might also come up in the course of confessing that would lead it to be longer. Again, don’t dwell, pray for the person.

 

[edward_george1]

If someone told you that they were too scared to go to confession, what would you say?

There’s no need to be scared. I’ve been a priest for over three years, I’ve heard over 10,000 confessions in that time, if my estimation is correct. I’ve heard everything, and none of it shocks me. I remember almost nothing of it, to the point that if I try to force myself to remember confessions, I have vague recollections of having been in the confessional, and basically nothing else. I have to go to confession too, so I’ve been on both sides of that screen.

At the end of the day, it’s a very freeing experience, and nothing to be scared of. The beauty of the seal of confession is that you get to leave things there forever, which means you don’t even have to worry about thinking on them yourself anymore. Just be grateful for the freedom and mercy you’ve been given by Christ.

 

[Swiftdove]

About Confession Father. I have 2 questions.

Is confession a prayer like the mass and is it said in Corpus Persona?

Do you require that the number of times be confessed along with the sin? why? or why not?

If we pray for each other like Jesus says and plan to take our sins to the next confession do you think venial sins be forgiven through group prayer?

 

[edward_george1]

One of the best books on the subject is Seven Secrets of Confession by Vinny Flynn. It’s a simple introduction that goes deep into how sin isn’t about breaking rules or bad behavior, but about damaging our relationship with God, and so how confession’s true nature is really about repairing that relationship. I read it right after ordination to prepare to hear confessions. And it was extremely helpful in that regard.

 

[edward_george1]

I prefer anonymous because there’s something very awkward to me about the person sitting in front of me and making eye contact as they confess their sins. It’s a personal preference, I’m just more comfortable with the anonymity. I know then that the person can be more open in talking about what they need to, and I can be a bit more objective in how I assist them.

In certain cases where it is indicated, yes, a regular confessor would be good, though the person could still go behind the screen, and perhaps identify himself. The scrupulous, people with persistent spiritual issues, or even people who struggle with certain sins and who would be more greatly held accountable by one confessor, rather than shopping around, these people would be good candidates for having a regular confessor. But this arrangement could be made even anonymously; the person could identify himself (without names necessarily, just saying that they are a regular, and maybe the issue that leads them to be). It’s a case by case thing, and mileage may vary.

As for whether it’s a good idea for confessor and spiritual director to be the same, again, mileage may vary. Some priests are comfortable with doing both, and some are not. For me, if someone approaches me for direction and confession in the same meeting, I ask them that we talk through the issues first before transitioning to confession, rather than the other way around. That way they don’t first bring up something in confession and then I have to try to navigate the seal and “play dumb” with them right after, they can speak freely, I can assist, and then we can end with confession.

 

[1Lord1Faith]

Is the seal of confession a divine law or an ecclesiastical law?

 

[edward_george1]

Is confession a prayer like the mass and is it said in Corpus Persona?

In Corpus Persona translates to “In body person.” I’m sure you mean “In persona Christi,” in which case yes, we say that all the sacraments work with the priest standing in persona Christi, since it is Christ who acts in the sacrament.

If we pray for each other like Jesus says and plan to take our sins to the next confession will venial sins be forgiven through group prayer?

Venial sins are remitted in a number of ways. I suppose if part of your group prayer included praying for forgiveness, then, yes it would remit venial sin.

Check out this link: http://www.newliturgicalmovement.org/2016/02/things-that-remit-venial-sins.html

 

[edward_george1]

Is the seal of confession a divine law or an ecclesiastical law?

Ecclesiastical law. It didn’t exist for the first few centuries of the Church, when confessions were done in public before the congregation, and penitents were gradually rehabilitated and allowed back into the liturgy.

 

[Swiftdove]

Do you require that the number of times be confessed along with the sin? why? or why not?

Thank you Father for all that you do. For summoning our Lord to the earth so many times, for the cleansing of our sins, for the prayers, For the hungry that you feed, for the Catholic answers Forums you do, for the Fire of faith you spread and much more! Thank you. Blessings

 

[Anna5]

Do you think almost all priests forget what is told them in confession? At my church confession is not common. Only a few people are going, so it might be easier for a priest to remember? Or is there some supernatural forgetting, that priests forget wat is said in confession because God erases their memory?

 

[edward_george1]

I’ve always said that there are three conceivable reasons why I forget everything I hear in confession:

1. The Holy Spirit. Most of what we’re asked to do as priests is truly beyond our power as human beings, and only the grace of the Holy Spirit enables us to do it and not only survive and endure it, but also to grow from it ourselves. If my memory worked as well for confession as it does for every single other interaction I have, it would have crushed me long ago.
2. Psychology. My brain records most everything. My brain knows not to record when I hear confessions. It stops recording at those times.
3. Sheer boredom. Seriously. Confession is not the most exciting thing in the world, at least the hearing sins part. I’ve said it in this thread and elsewhere, once you’ve been ordained about a month or two, you’ve heard everything you’re going to hear. Rarely do you hear anything all that existentially difficult. Most of the time it’s the same dozen things. It’s not memorable because it all runs together.

Between those three things, most of my brothers would agree too, somewhere in there we don’t remember confessions.

 

[vz71]

Is there a reason confession should take so long?

Time is a funny thing.
I know I have gone to confession and feel certain I only spent a few minutes and feel I should have spent more time.
But upon exit, I discover I had been in for almost 15 minutes.

 

[Anna5]

Thanks you for your answers, Father! You said that by the grace of the Holy Spirit you grow yourself from hearing confessions. That is wonderful! In what ways do you grow from hearing confessions?

 

[Zach]

Is there a “proper” way penitents should feel when leaving the Confession booth after being absolved? A feeling of relief? Joy? Indifference? I can’t p(name removed by moderator)oint my exact feeling. I just know I feel better when leaving the booth than when entering.