Asking for tips on how to be a good husband

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This is really great advice!! Some men are not comfortable with doing these kinds of things, but most women do enjoy it!:clapping:
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Carolyn:
Pray together.

Pray for her.

Listen, even when you want to rescue her with advice just listen, with your full attention. Most of the time that is exactly what she wants.

Remember the compliments you paid her when you first began dating. Once in a while, out of the blue tell her you appreciate her, or you love her cooking, or tell her how beautiful she looks to you right then and there. Let her catch you looking at her when your across the room at a crowded party. NEVER assume that she knows these things.

Hold hands in public.

Scrape the ice off her windshield before she leaves for work in the winter.

Every once in a while eat dinner by candlelight. Even if it’s pizza.

Encourage her.

When you have children be involved with them.

Back her up if she has a disagreement with your mother.

Love her and honor her and cherish her all the days of your life.

God Bless You!
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Bear in mind that she’s marrying you thinking that you’re going to change for the better, and you’re marrying her hoping that she never changes. Chances are you’re both going to be disappointed.

Oh yeah, while you’re at it, learn the two most important words for a husband: “Yes, dear!”

😛

DaveBj
 
Dr. James Dobson of Focus on the Family has written books about marriage and family. One of these is “What Wives Wish their Husbands knew about women.” I might have that title a bit wrong, but you get the idea. Any public library has Dobson’s books. They are all very helpful. No, they aren’t Catholic, but they are written from a solid Christian point of view. Now my advice, go in your marriage knowing that things aren’t always going to be fun and romantic, but with effort and prayer, things get better as the years go by. I think lots of people just give up after a few years of marriage, it isn’t so much fun anymore, and life is stressful. Hang in there! My husband and I had some tough times for a while. But things are better now and we know that we can work our way through anything. That is so comforting. God bless you in your life together. Theresa
 
Where do I start?


  1. *]Money - always put the household finances ahead of your own interests. In other words, buying that next Playstation game is not nearly as important as buying new tires for the car. Sacrifice is a HUGE part of being a husband and father.
    *]Sex - Sex is love. If you view your wife as a sex object, she’ll come to feel that the only time you want her is to satisfy yourself.
    *]Family - You are the buffer between your wife and your parents. If your wife complains about your parents, something they’ve said, or something they’ve done, its up to YOU to go to your parents and straighten it out. And NEVER, EVER tell your parents your wife was upset at them. Make it very clear that your first loyalties are with your wife. (This works both ways, btw)
    *]Romance - Flowers, cards, perfume, chocolate are NOT gifts that are limited to Valentine’s Day. My dad used to bring home such gifts for no reason other than to say, “I love you.”
    *]Housework - She’ll be happy if you help with housework. I claimed the worst chores as my territory - cleaning dishes, toilets, showers, and vacuuming carpets. Your wife should never have to do the most disgusting work. Also, when your wife asks you to do something, especially when you’re watching TV or involved in some activity, never complain or grumble, but rather jump right and, with a broad smile, say, “What do you need me to do?”
    *]Arguments - during or after an argument, ask yourself if what you’re arguing about is really worth screwing up your marriage. The answer will always be “no”.
    *]Faith - Your most important obligation as a husband is to ensure that your wife gets to Heaven. Never lose sight of this.

    Finally, my dad gave me some advice before I got married. Put your wife on a pedestal. Make her the queen of your world. Nothing that you want, or think you need, is nearly as important as her wants and needs. With this kind of an attitude, you can never go wrong!
 
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Patrick2340:
Where do I start?


  1. *]Money - always put the household finances ahead of your own interests. In other words, buying that next Playstation game is not nearly as important as buying new tires for the car. Sacrifice is a HUGE part of being a husband and father.
    *]Sex - Sex is love. If you view your wife as a sex object, she’ll come to feel that the only time you want her is to satisfy yourself.
    *]Family - You are the buffer between your wife and your parents. If your wife complains about your parents, something they’ve said, or something they’ve done, its up to YOU to go to your parents and straighten it out. And NEVER, EVER tell your parents your wife was upset at them. Make it very clear that your first loyalties are with your wife. (This works both ways, btw)
    *]Romance - Flowers, cards, perfume, chocolate are NOT gifts that are limited to Valentine’s Day. My dad used to bring home such gifts for no reason other than to say, “I love you.”
    *]Housework - She’ll be happy if you help with housework. I claimed the worst chores as my territory - cleaning dishes, toilets, showers, and vacuuming carpets. Your wife should never have to do the most disgusting work. Also, when your wife asks you to do something, especially when you’re watching TV or involved in some activity, never complain or grumble, but rather jump right and, with a broad smile, say, “What do you need me to do?”
    *]Arguments - during or after an argument, ask yourself if what you’re arguing about is really worth screwing up your marriage. The answer will always be “no”.
    *]Faith - Your most important obligation as a husband is to ensure that your wife gets to Heaven. Never lose sight of this.

    Finally, my dad gave me some advice before I got married. Put your wife on a pedestal. Make her the queen of your world. Nothing that you want, or think you need, is nearly as important as her wants and needs. With this kind of an attitude, you can never go wrong!
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  1. your dad is a very wise man… pay close attention to him… and i know you do… 👍
 
Congratulations,
Serve her with all you heart, mind and soul with the forethought of receiving NOTHING in return. If you are rewarded for your service, good. If not, then your service will be your reward.

…and the second commandment is like it, You shall love your neighbor as yourself…and your wive will be your closest neighbor.
 
check out TarAshley’s thread on how to be good wife, you guys need to talk
 
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Patrick2340:
Where do I start?

  1. *]Money - always put the household finances ahead of your own interests. In other words, buying that next Playstation game is not nearly as important as buying new tires for the car. Sacrifice is a HUGE part of being a husband and father.
    *]Sex - Sex is love. If you view your wife as a sex object, she’ll come to feel that the only time you want her is to satisfy yourself.
    *]Family - You are the buffer between your wife and your parents. If your wife complains about your parents, something they’ve said, or something they’ve done, its up to YOU to go to your parents and straighten it out. And NEVER, EVER tell your parents your wife was upset at them. Make it very clear that your first loyalties are with your wife. (This works both ways, btw)
    *]Romance - Flowers, cards, perfume, chocolate are NOT gifts that are limited to Valentine’s Day. My dad used to bring home such gifts for no reason other than to say, “I love you.”
    *]Housework - She’ll be happy if you help with housework. I claimed the worst chores as my territory - cleaning dishes, toilets, showers, and vacuuming carpets. Your wife should never have to do the most disgusting work. Also, when your wife asks you to do something, especially when you’re watching TV or involved in some activity, never complain or grumble, but rather jump right and, with a broad smile, say, “What do you need me to do?”
    *]Arguments - during or after an argument, ask yourself if what you’re arguing about is really worth screwing up your marriage. The answer will always be “no”.
    *]Faith - Your most important obligation as a husband is to ensure that your wife gets to Heaven. Never lose sight of this.

    Finally, my dad gave me some advice before I got married. Put your wife on a pedestal. Make her the queen of your world. Nothing that you want, or think you need, is nearly as important as her wants and needs. With this kind of an attitude, you can never go wrong!
Click to expand...

  1. Oh my goodness! what a lucky lucky wife you must have! i just copied and emailed this to my fiancee!
 
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asquared:
check out TarAshley’s thread on how to be good wife, you guys need to talk
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I would also recomend “Boundaries in Marriage” by Townsend and Cloud. Hits the nail on the head–many marriage fail because each person hates to be controlled, but wants to be able to control the other even in subtle ways.
 
My 25th anniversary is in four months and my wife still tells me I’m a wonderful husband. Ignoring my failures, I will say the one rule that works is this: Before you do anything, consider what impact it will have on her (and the kids when they come). If you always consider her needs first, things will work out. My wife always knows when I need the nap and then pays me back by giving me a break.

Also, remember she is your banquet table. Even reading the menu is not an option. She will remain wonderful in your eyes and she will never feel inadequate. Also, until my hours at work changed I held “Tracy Days” for my wife out of the blue. I would get flowers or a gift, prepare a special meal and generally treat her like the birthday girl. She was always grateful.

Listen closely to what she says. Women can express themselves if different ways than men so we have to try to hear what they are saying.

And finally, if you love your wife love her children.
 
I wanted to resurrect this thread. I thought it was such good advice. I have really been thinking lately how I can be a better husband. Instread of thinking “if my wife did this…” trying to focus on myself.

Any more ideas in addition to the great ones listed??
 
Here is another tip that will make others envy your marriage. It also positively affect your attitude towards your wife.

These really go for both of you. Ready?
  1. Never criticize your wife in front of other people.
  2. Never complain about her to other people - especially not your family (I can’t stress how important that part is. When you make up, your family doesn’t know all is forgiven and it negatively affects their view of her).
  3. Do compliment her freely to and in front of other people.
These rules diminish the negative and emphasize the positive. It can’t but make you think well of your spouse. When guys at work are saying how bad their wives’ cooking is or how they spend too much money don’t join in about how your wife does the same. Compliment her instead.

People have told my wife and I that we have the “perfect” marriage. Not because it is, but because we follow these simple rules.
 
Men: Supercharge Your Marriage!
growthtrac.com/study/
This is just one exerpt from this wonderful website…and you can subscribe to it, and receive a daily marriage minute. My suggestion is this…if you want to have a great marriage…not just an OK marriage then each day you need to keep your convenant by consciously making a decision to make your marriage the most important thing you do all day after praising and worshipping God.

How to Listen

• Lean forward and look into her eyes
• Inquire by saying, “Tell me more”
• Stop interrupting with your “answers”
• Tell her what you heard her say and ask if you are right
• Express comfort: “I am sorry for how you have suffered”
• Never look at your watch while she is talking
 
thanks for the great additional tips! I need to check that website out- it looks good.

I have occassionally (1-2 times per year) watched our wedding video, esp. the exchange of vows. It helps me remember the promise I made to her and to God- I value the sacrament part of marriage a lot more now than I did 15 years ago when we married. Seeing me say “I do” helps refresh the covenant today, when things are so much more complex than when we were 23!!
 
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