Asking Someone to Remoev Inappropriate Picture

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PeteZaHut

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I was on Facebook today (if you don’t know what that is, it’s like myspace). I saw that my cousin had an inappropriate picture of herself on there. I don’t really know her well enough to have a talk with her and explain why she shouldn’t have that up there. Am I even morally responsible for saying anything? Should I leave a note on facebook saying something like “I know your mother wouldn’t be happy about that picture?”
 
PeteZaHut said:
I was on Facebook today (if you don’t know what that is, it’s like myspace). I saw that my cousin had an inappropriate picture of herself on there. I don’t really know her well enough to have a talk with her and explain why she shouldn’t have that up there. Am I even morally responsible for saying anything? Should I leave a note on facebook saying something like “I know your mother wouldn’t be happy about that picture?”
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Could you leave a note that said: “This is your mother and I am not happy with that picture. Take it down!” ?
 
How old is this cousin?
I mean, you can speak to her about it, in a kind and loving manner, but if she’s an adult, there’s little else you can do.

Also, just how inappropriate is this? What is too much for some
is fine with others, and you and she may be on differing ends
of the spectrum.

Just approach her in a non judgmental way about it, ask why she likes that particular photo over others, and see how it goes.
 
Or you could mention the possible dangerous consequences of leaving such a picture online, other than the moral ones. Stalkers, prospective employers, admissions counselors, etc., could see the picture and difficulties could result.

Betsy
 
PeteZaHut said:
I was on Facebook today (if you don’t know what that is, it’s like myspace). I saw that my cousin had an inappropriate picture of herself on there. I don’t really know her well enough to have a talk with her and explain why she shouldn’t have that up there. Am I even morally responsible for saying anything? Should I leave a note on facebook saying something like “I know your mother wouldn’t be happy about that picture?”
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IMO, you should probably speak to her about it IN PRIVATE not in an open message on the site. With charity, explain why it is offensive and what others who see it could think. If your cousin is still a teen or pre-teen, I’d follow that up by mentioning the situation to her parents (only if your cousin doesn’t take the picture down after you have spoken with her). If sin = death, then I believe it is your responsibility to attempt to rescue your cousin from it. I have no doubt that if her house was ablaze, you would attempt to save her; how much more is the importance here where we are talking about the soul as opposed to life in this world? Again though, it’s all in the approach, so remember to be kind, understanding, charitable, and explain to her that the reason why you are speaking to her about the situation is because you love her and don’t want her to suffer any consequences because of it (in this life or the next). God bless.
 
PeteZaHut said:
I was on Facebook today (if you don’t know what that is, it’s like myspace). I saw that my cousin had an inappropriate picture of herself on there. I don’t really know her well enough to have a talk with her and explain why she shouldn’t have that up there. Am I even morally responsible for saying anything? Should I leave a note on facebook saying something like “I know your mother wouldn’t be happy about that picture?”
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Isn’t there an option to “report this picture”? I think it’s anonymous…
I know, it’s a little underhanded, but it may work…
 
PeteZaHut said:
Should I leave a note on facebook saying something like “I know your mother wouldn’t be happy about that picture?”
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Don’t say that! She isn’t likely to listen to you, and is likely to take you off of her friend list if you say that. If it’s really bad, report it to the moderators. If it is toleratable by Facebook standards, then I would ignore it or take your cousin off your friends list. I am very picky about who I put on my friends lists from those kinds of things.
 
If it were my daughter, I would want you to email me a link to the photo so I could see what she was up to. I am assuming she is a teenager, and not an adult.

Don’t we have a moral obligation to help each other avoid sin? Isn’t that what you would be doing, by asking her to take the picture down?

If it is racy, the sin may have already been committed. In this case, you would know about it, and not be doing anything to stop it.
 
PeteZaHut said:
I was on Facebook today (if you don’t know what that is, it’s like myspace). I saw that my cousin had an inappropriate picture of herself on there. I don’t really know her well enough to have a talk with her and explain why she shouldn’t have that up there. Am I even morally responsible for saying anything? Should I leave a note on facebook saying something like “I know your mother wouldn’t be happy about that picture?”
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Thanks Pete… I got all paranoid and checked my daughters facebook because she has a cousin Pete that she talks to there but doesn’t remember meeting when she was 18 mos old… good one… BTW… all dd’s pictures are fine…
 
PeteZaHut said:
I was on Facebook today (if you don’t know what that is, it’s like myspace). I saw that my cousin had an inappropriate picture of herself on there. I don’t really know her well enough to have a talk with her and explain why she shouldn’t have that up there. Am I even morally responsible for saying anything? Should I leave a note on facebook saying something like “I know your mother wouldn’t be happy about that picture?”
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Simply ask her what kind of people she is trying to draw? Does she want only pervs to email her or does she want decent nice people to email her.

If she is underage, then complain to the ISP that sponsors that service or maybe joke with her about being jail bait, are your trying to draw pervs to you?

Yes, say something to her, out of concern for her safety.

👍
 
Facebook Safety
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Facebook aspires to be an environment where people can interact safely with their friends and the people around them. We have implemented many safety and privacy controls on Facebook as part of our goal to enable people to share their information with only the people they want to see it. And we are constantly improving our systems for identifying and removing inappropriate content and people from the site.
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,
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Facebook takes the safety of its users very seriously and takes significant efforts to take down any objectionable material that may be posted on the site. We encourage users to report offensive profiles, messages, groups and photos. Reported items are then reviewed by customer support representatives and removed if deemed in violation of our Terms of Use. Users may also block others from finding them in searches, viewing their profile or sending them messages.
What kind of privacy controls do you have?
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facebook.com/help.php?tab=safety
 
PeteZaHut said:
Should I leave a note on facebook saying something like “I know your mother wouldn’t be happy about that picture?”
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Absolutely! That’s the way Facebook works.

People post information on Facebook that they know will be available to the public. They also solicit comments about their content from the public. You are a member of the online public, you have seen her site, and you have been invited to comment. If she receives only positive comments, she will not have the full picture. I think your comment would be perfect under the circumstances.
 
You need to tell her in a gentle way that she needs to take that picture off Myspace because there might be young men looking at it and commiting sin.

In that case she is causing them to commit sin which means she is commiting sin by posting it.

This is not a case of hurting her feelings it is a case of trying to save her Immortal Soul.

Since you know about it it is your responcibility to explain to her what I said above.

Mayo
 
Someone mentioned this already but it is very true since we have been warned about this as law students and examples of stories were given to us at Orientation. Potential employers could look at this and determine she is not the type of person they want to represent their company.
 
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