At adoration...

[NewsTheMan]

I was at Adoration this evening. And ummm… well, basically I want to know if I can tell someone to keep quiet?

A man came in and the best way I can describe it is - it looked like, for the entire hour, he was shouting at Jesus in the sacrement. Now, his voice wasn’t shouting but it was at a level that was a loud whisper, such that it was very disturbing. In the otherwise silent Church, it seemed like shouting. His hand gestures were, as I said, quite violent and it looked like he was shouting at God. He was going back and forth and his hands were moving this and that way and all the while I just thought to myself that it looks exactly like a parent having a go at his child. He also started swaying at one point whilst I believe singing (in the same very loud whisper level).

As you can imagine, all this was veyr distracting. I fear passing judgement on this man and saying it was disrespectful - maybe he was a “charismatic” Catholic? I know here on CAF people get very wound up about statements like “I thought it was disrespectful to Jesus and to the others at Adoration”. Anyway…

If he appears next week, is it okay for me to ask him to be quiet and less violent in his movements? I really look forward to my Holy hour each week with Jesus - it took months to get this started - and to have this was really rubbish for me. I know, I know… ignore eveything else around you and concentrate on Jesus. But a distraction is called a distraction for a reason.

 

[st_lucy]

I think maybe you can (if you happen to be at Adoration with him again) offer up your annoyances. This may be one of his first times back at Adoration in a long time and your telling him to be quite may push him right back out.

I know as a mother of young children I have had people look at my children (really only at one of them) when they might of been praying loudly. I am glad I had someone tell me that they enjoyed seeing them there, because I was always unsure if we should return. I am pretty sure that when I first started going, (I had just returned to the Church) if someone would have told me something to the effect of me or my little children being too loud it might have turned me away.

We all pray a little different and I like to think of it as we are all one big family and at Adoration we are visiting our Lord fully present, and we must always remember that my needs are not more important than my brothers. God knows what is in our heart and that is all that matters so we must work to keep little irritations out.

 

[GloriousOrder]

Two older priests from Boston once came into the (Catholic) book store where I am currently employed, and they inquired about a book. We did not have it, and they seemed very indignant, because it was a newish tome about the Society of Jesus. They come up to this city every summer for a vacation, so I am sure they had looked forward to it. Both of them were very picky about the fact that we didn’t have this book, and sniffed at our offers to order it for them. Far be it from me to judge their souls, but their actions had obviously led them to become very prissy and easily-offended.

They subsequently talked about a certain mentally-ill man who sometimes interjects loudly during the Mass in our local cathedral, at noontide. I’ve met this fellow before, and it is manifestly obvious that he has at least one problem with being in public. At Mass, he is never still or quiet, but our patience for suffering and distraction always wins out against our impatience with him. We must resign ourselves to trials and irritations on Earth, and even embrace the annoying people with our hearts. These two priests on holiday had obviously lost the meaning of Christ’s message in their minds that day, for all they did was go on for 15-20 minutes about the fact that this man “takes away respect from the Eucharist”. I agreed with them quietly, but their lack of charity to this poor person was very loudly manifest. “Respect for the Eucharist” does not entail total silence at all times, like some oppressive mental ward, especially if there is a sick person around.

It is most meritorious for us to suffer in this life, and such little irritations as that are nothing compared to being locked out of your monastery, mistaken for strangers - and St. Francis of Assisi called that perfect joy! How much more perfect joy will it be to remain silent as a disturbed man is embraced by the Soul of our Lord before the Sacrament? You should be happy that this poor fellow is drawn to the Eucharist in his own eccentric way, for Christ wraps His entire being around him - and you, too, if you bear it with patience. The world is far too full of death and atheism for you to worry about a pious man making some noise. Respect the Eucharist by your faith, hope, and charity - not by “shushing” someone, however solemnly you do it.

 

[HCC]

I say let him go that one time. He might have been in a lot of pain. Offer it up and try to work through the distraction. However, if he is doing it regularly, maybe, in kindness, mention that it is very distracting.

There is a lady who sits behind me a lot at Mass and as soon as the priest gets up to speak she fumbles through her pocket book looking for change for the collection. Once she has the coins, she cups her hands and jiggles the change around through the entire sermon. I almost can’t bear it, but I’d rather offer it up than cause her pain and embarrassment.

 

[Apollos]

he was shouting at Jesus in the sacrement

I’ve wanted to do this too.

It’s safe to assume the guy is crazy. My home parish was in a downtown urban area and we got our share of crazies and other assorted derelicts. One time a guy wandered in with a swollen hand (he had obviously injured it by punching someone) and who was surrounded by a thick cloud of alcohol vapor that I could literally taste in the air as he sat down next to me. He asked for money. I didn’t have any. I asked him if he won the fight. He said no. He asked where he could get a sandwich. I said there was a Quiznos down the block. Then he sulked out. Another time some nutcase wandered in during mass, went up the altar and started yelling at the priest, who stopped mass, turned off his microphone, walked over to him and engaged him in conversation until the ushers took him back outside. Then there were your garden-variety homeless people who would hide under the pews before closing time so they would have a place to spend the night.

As far as I know, there are two ways to deal with your guy. You can just count him as part of that very special ambiance of a Catholic Church, or - and this may work for me if only because I’m wired this way - you can turn around and yell, “Hey YOU! No, the OTHER nutcase ranting by the baptismal font - KNOCK IT OFF, we’re trying to PRAY here.” Yes, right there in the presence of the Blessed Sacrament. How you say it, and how you behave, makes all the difference. For me, it would be a matter of being direct but not necessarily hostile - big cities breed that. But of paramount importance, however, is that in your confrontation you send a subtle message that you are open to interacting with him instead of hiding behind a passive-aggressive forcefield that people put up when they have to talk to people they don’t know.

I dunno. Maybe this is one of those things that sounds more complicated the more you try to explain it. “Hey REIN IT IN pal, I can barely hear the Holy Spirit!”

Anyway, sometimes you have to deal with the Jesus that is *here *rather than the Jesus that is there.

 

[corsair]

I had a similar experience yesterday at Adoration. I, and several other had been in silent prayer for about 45 minutes when in comes this Hispanic family; grandpa, grandma, mother and two little girls who were absolutely just the perfect “dolls” as I have ever seen (and I have 18 grandchildren).

As the adults knelt for Adoration the two little girls began to run around on the pews, squealing and chatting. Then they ran to the paschal candle stand (which is brass) and began pounding on the base like it was a drum. Then squealed and ran around the church.

I stuck it out for a few minutes and then left for the parish office as I had a meeting with the priest.

As politely as I could, I told the priest why I had left Adoration a little early for the meeting. He was very concerned that some folks would not control their children. He went into the church and I’m assuming spoke to the family. Not sure just what was said as I had left for home by that time.

I pray that the family will realize that we were in the prescence of Christ at Adoration and will teach their young children about reverence.

 

[Momofmyangels]

I pray that the family will realize that we were in the prescence of Christ at Adoration and will teach their young children about reverence.

That is exactly true. Often people become annoyed with little children simply for acting like the little children that they are. If they are not taught respect and reverence for Our Lord, it is not their faults. The fault lies in the faulty (or lack of) education received from their parents.

 

[Bob_Aliano]

I was at Adoration this evening. And ummm… well, basically I want to know if I can tell someone to keep quiet?

A man came in and the best way I can describe it is - it looked like, for the entire hour, he was shouting at Jesus in the sacrement. Now, his voice wasn’t shouting but it was at a level that was a loud whisper, such that it was very disturbing. In the otherwise silent Church, it seemed like shouting. His hand gestures were, as I said, quite violent and it looked like he was shouting at God. He was going back and forth and his hands were moving this and that way and all the while I just thought to myself that it looks exactly like a parent having a go at his child. He also started swaying at one point whilst I believe singing (in the same very loud whisper level).

As you can imagine, all this was veyr distracting. I fear passing judgement on this man and saying it was disrespectful - maybe he was a “charismatic” Catholic? I know here on CAF people get very wound up about statements like “I thought it was disrespectful to Jesus and to the others at Adoration”. Anyway…

If he appears next week, is it okay for me to ask him to be quiet and less violent in his movements? I really look forward to my Holy hour each week with Jesus - it took months to get this started - and to have this was really rubbish for me. I know, I know… ignore eveything else around you and concentrate on Jesus. But a distraction is called a distraction for a reason.

It would appear the poor guy is either temporarily disturbed or has a mental disorder. My suggestion is to make the pastor aware so someone in the proper capacity can be on hand at the next Holy Hour. Do not attempt to handle it yourself!

 

[CB_Catholic]

I was at Adoration this evening. And ummm… well, basically I want to know if I can tell someone to keep quiet?

A man came in and the best way I can describe it is - it looked like, for the entire hour, he was shouting at Jesus in the sacrement. Now, his voice wasn’t shouting but it was at a level that was a loud whisper, such that it was very disturbing. In the otherwise silent Church, it seemed like shouting. His hand gestures were, as I said, quite violent and it looked like he was shouting at God. He was going back and forth and his hands were moving this and that way and all the while I just thought to myself that it looks exactly like a parent having a go at his child. He also started swaying at one point whilst I believe singing (in the same very loud whisper level).

As you can imagine, all this was veyr distracting. I fear passing judgement on this man and saying it was disrespectful - maybe he was a “charismatic” Catholic? I know here on CAF people get very wound up about statements like “I thought it was disrespectful to Jesus and to the others at Adoration”. Anyway…

If he appears next week, is it okay for me to ask him to be quiet and less violent in his movements? I really look forward to my Holy hour each week with Jesus - it took months to get this started - and to have this was really rubbish for me. I know, I know… ignore eveything else around you and concentrate on Jesus. But a distraction is called a distraction for a reason.

He may have been having a really hard time with something and was angry with God at the time and needed to work things out, who knows? It’s not the way most of us would act, but people are different. If you go next week and see the same thing, perhaps you could politely approach him, but if he resists, maybe you will have to change your hour. I know from experience that, as hard as we try, sometimes distractions like this just can’t be ignored. BTW, most charismatic Catholics do not act like this in Adoration.

 

[OraLabora]

Our abbey is kind of on the local tourist circuit, and often we have people showing up at the chapel of the Blessed Sacrament or the main church, speaking loudly. I have and will continue to tell them “shhhh!”. I figure with all the “Silence please” signs all over the place they have it coming.

Of course you have to be careful, once it was the prior showing someone the architecture of the chapel

 

[NewsTheMan]

LOL Apollos - thats exactly the kinda guy I am too. In usual circumstances I just say that kinda thing to people. It works. But I am trying to stop doing it - intimidation isn’t a good thing. Especially in Church

From what I gather, I agree with most that he was probably in a lot of pain. So thats why I left it that time around. The only thing is… and read before your racist comments flood in.

He was a black dude. Here in South Africa - black people experience God differently. They are more… I guess charismatic is the onyl way to describe it. Sadly, even their Mass will be mostly unrecognizable to most of us here. Slightly OT, but I think the reason is because most of the black people in SA are Evangelical protestants - and this appeals to them. I think, sadly again, Catholicism had to ‘bend’ in order to accomodate souls who might otherwise turn to evangelical Church’s.

So I think this might have had something to do with it. His whisper shout was really loud - and I remember hearing something like (but I could be wrong, I wasn’t trying to listen) - “Father, you are the king” over and over again. So all the swinging of hands etc was like a real attempt to say that properly. I dunno.

Anyway - I should have known people would say he is crazy I am almost 100% certain he isn’t. In a small town like this, with the social divides, lack of accessability, etc it is highly highly highly highly unlikely that he was a crazy man.

Next time, I will quietly ask him to tone it down. While I get that people should be allowed to access God in their own way - it comes down to the age old ‘your right is stepping on my right’ argument. What if I liked adoration to have gregorian chant full blast and all the lights off? In front of the blessed sacrament - which is known as a place of silent worship - this isn’t the right place to do that kind of thing.

 

[Apollos]

LOL Apollos - thats exactly the kinda guy I am too. … He was a black dude. Here in South Africa … Evangelical protestants … social divides … I will quietly ask him to tone it down.

Intimidation has nothing to do with it - it’s simple, uncomplicated, drama-free directness from one guy to another Works for me every time. (For me.) But just because he has culture-shock issues doesn’t mean he can break the rules or reinterpret them to suit his emotional state. I’m in the USA. I don’t walk into black pentecostal storefront churches and kneel & cross myself while reciting my Preces Latinae. I respect the customs of the place, even if it’s around the corner from my house. Yet maybe it’s different in SA. You tell me.

 

[LilyM]

I say let him go that one time. He might have been in a lot of pain. Offer it up and try to work through the distraction. However, if he is doing it regularly, maybe, in kindness, mention that it is very distracting.

There is a lady who sits behind me a lot at Mass and as soon as the priest gets up to speak she fumbles through her pocket book looking for change for the collection. Once she has the coins, she cups her hands and jiggles the change around through the entire sermon. I almost can’t bear it, but I’d rather offer it up than cause her pain and embarrassment.

Reminds me of St Therese of Lisieux’s ‘little way’ - offering up the big and little annoyances of her day such as the nun sitting next to her loudly clanking her rosary beads, or the one doing the washing with her who kept splashing water into her face. I’m sure God will bless you for your forbearance with this lady.

I’m not so sure, however, about people who appear to be very agitated or angry rather than simply annoying. There’s always the off chance that they may do some violence to themselves or someone else when in that state. Not so sure what to do about it though, except perhaps pray hard for them.

 

[rosary_kat]

I was at Adoration this evening. And ummm… well, basically I want to know if I can tell someone to keep quiet?

An Hispanic gentlemen was going through something similar some time ago. He was not insane. He was very pious. His tears were real. His breast-beating was sincere. His culture was simply different than mine. I smiled at him when it was my time to leave and made the sign of the cross. I simply wanted him to know someone here on earth was listening too.

I agree with the poster, however, that if you truly think someone is disturbed, don’t approach them yourselves. Our Adoration Chapel has a cellphone for just such emergencies. You might have stepped out and called the coordinator. You’re not alone, either.

 

[LSG]

How magnificent is the unconditional love with which Jesus and His most beautiful Blessed Mother embrace all of us, no matter what our mental or physical condition! I pray that even when I am old and feeble, I will be able to spend a great deal more time adoring Him and preparing my soul for eternity…

Saint Therese of the Little Flower and Saint Bernadette, Pray for us…

 

[absitinvidia]

Things like that happen at Adoration, from whispers to creaking pews, to some pretty loud snoring.

I do the same thing then that I do at Mass: I pray for God to bless them.

In your guy’s case, I would pray that God sends an angel to comfort him, because he sounds like he’s going through something.

Or, if he does this every time, and you feel you can safely approach him, maybe follow him out as he leaves and ask him if everything is alright. Maybe he’s not aware that Adoration is supposed to be solemn. Maybe he doesn’t realize his actions are that disturbing. Or maybe he needs someone to talk to.

 

[GwenL]

I bring earplugs, soft foamy ones that I use for flying. If people are praying or talking so loudly during Adoration that I can’t hear myself think, I put in the earplugs and pray for them. Same thing before and after Mass. Probably that is avoidance, but since I’m not yet at the level of spiritual development of St Therese, so be it.

If someone seems like they are unstable and likely to hurt themselves or someone else, call 911.