Attendant at wedding

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momoffaith

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I was told it is a mortal sin to be a maid of honor for a woman who is a Catholic currently living with fiance who is getting married at a protestant church. Is this true?
 
I’m not sure if it is a mortal sin but participating in this way means supporting their behaviour and choices, ie. living in sin and marrying outside the church.
 
I would talk to your priest about it and ask his advice for how to handle the situation.
 
Read this first:
forums.catholic-questions.org/showthread.php?t=590240

The thing you have to understand is that by participating in their wedding, you are supporting their decisions. You show support of the fact that they have co-habitated before marriage, and you show support of their decision to marry in a protestant church.

For two protestants to marry in their own church is one thing (and is recognized as a valid marriage). But for a Catholic to marry a non-Catholic in a protestant church, there are guidlines to be met to prevent this from being simply a civil union…not a valid marriage.

May I ask why they are not getting married in a Catholic Church even though the bride is Catholic? Have they consulted with her Priest? Will there be a Priest present at the ceremony to witness the union while the protestant pastor officiates?
 
They are both divorced and no their will not be a priest at the ceremony. An annulment process has not been started, but my hope is that once they are married in a civil ceremony, they will begin the process. There are children involved.
 
They are both divorced and no their will not be a priest at the ceremony. An annulment process has not been started, but my hope is that once they are married in a civil ceremony, they will begin the process. There are children involved.
They must first seek an annulment, and avoid sex, otherwise, they are committing adultery. If you attend the wedding, you are supporting that decision.
 
If a wedding will be invalid…I do not go…nor do I give gifts…even later to the “married couple”…nothing to show any “approval” of what in reality is a fiction…(even if they are perhaps in “good conscience” subjectively)…So I can not recommend anyone going to such…

Certainly acting as a bridesmaid (not me of course I am not a woman) would be in my mind out of the question…one then is very clearly seen as approving etc. It is a very public endorsement. And it is also important to note that the maid of honor is actually the official witness legally (etc) (not that the OP was asked to be either…I just note it)

I will love them and will be friends etc…but I must only act truth. Charity yes…but Charity without truth is not charity…

Catechism:

1868 Sin is a personal act. Moreover, we have a responsibility for the sins committed by others when we cooperate in them:

—by participating directly and voluntarily in them;

—by ordering, advising, praising, or approving them;

—by not disclosing or not hindering them when we have an obligation to do so;

—by protecting evil-doers

(Perhaps there are times when attendance can be done avoiding such approval etc…I have seen the argument made in very good circles …[cuf.org/faithfacts/details_view.asp?ffID=137…(note](http://www.cuf.org/faithfacts/details_view.asp?ffID=137…(note) there the article goes into many things…including what I noted) but I have yet to judge I should attend)
 
I think it would be particularly wrong to be maid-of-honor or best man at such a wedding. It would seem that you are not only attending the ceremony, but as witnesses attesting to its validity. [Just my speculation]
 
Thank you all for your responses, especially Bookcat. I have been raised in a very Catholic environment, all my married family & friends are all Catholic and I have never come across this situation. May God bless you all.
 
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