Attending Non-Catholic Wedding

[Pinatz]

Is there any official teaching about attending the non-Catholic wedding of someone who was raised Catholic but no longer practices? Are there at least some official guidelines?

Someone made a point that attending such a wedding is condoning mortal sin because the couple is not married according to the Church. This person asked me how can I be against homosexuality if I condone the sin of the heterosexual couple.

Can anyone provide me with a website or book to find out what the official teaching is? Thanks.

 

[Texas_Roofer]

Is there any official teaching about attending the non-Catholic wedding of someone who was raised Catholic but no longer practices? Are there at least some official guidelines?

Someone made a point that attending such a wedding is condoning mortal sin because the couple is not married according to the Church. This person asked me how can I be against homosexuality if I condone the sin of the heterosexual couple.

Can anyone provide me with a website or book to find out what the official teaching is? Thanks.

Well think about this if you did not ask to review the Bishop’s approval for two people marrying in the church should you ask to review the Bishop’s dispensation for the couple marrying outside the church? My advice is when we mind our own business things work out well.

If someone makes a point of informing others they will not follow the church rules, you have the option of refraining from the wedding. I would send a gift “for your celebration”(not a wedding gift) as we are not to judge, but in my opinion (IMO) the gift obligates you to later counsel the person on the value of returning to the church.

Many others write attend the reception but not the wedding.

The official teaching is we are not to promote sin. I know of no teaching on whether this qualifies.

 

[katy]

I just went to the non-Catholic wedding of my daughter and danced at the reception. My heart was heavy because she married outside the Church, but I was not taught enough myself to teach her properly when she was a child, and the Church doesn’t seem to have bothered either in her religion classes. I honestly tried, only to be told I was “conservative” and “old-church” whatever that is. I did not even come into the church until I was in my 30’s. Unfortunately it was the deepest of the deeply unorthodox times around here. How could I not participate in her wedding when she thought she was doing the right thing by getting married by the uncle of her groom. I am hoping that by preserving our very good relationship someday she may understand more about the beauty of the Church the same way I have in recent years.

 

[JimG]

This question has been addressed quite often in the Ask An Apologist forum. It does not have a definitive answer, because it is a matter of prudential judgment.

It is also addressed here: cuf.org/faithfacts/details_view.asp?ffID=137

One of the comments often made is “What message am I sending by attending?” In other words, does my attendance signify my approval to the couple or to others that I believe the marriage is valid, or that I am approving their actions?

For practical purposes, the answer is usually, I am sending no message whatever by my attendance or non-attendance. No one else really cares about my views on this particular marriage. For practical purposes, the only message I send by my refusal to attend is that the bride or groom or family may take it as a personal insult.

In most cases, whether I attend or not, no one is going to examine or care about my reasons for attending or not attending.