Attending/participating in friends non denominational wedding

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Hi all. I’m to be the best man at a friend’s wedding. He and the bride are non denominational. As a member of the wedding party, I would like to explore what pitfalls to avoid as far as participation in the ceremony is concerned.

Any advice is appreciated.
 
There won’t be much participation other than standing there. Most ND weddings I’ve been to last about 20 minutes and it’s maybe 1 or 2 readings, exchange of vows and rings, kiss the bride, and you’re outta there.
 
What about if they have a ceremony involving “bread and wine”? Am I correct in my understanding that I or any other Catholics in attendance ought not to participate? (I’m actually not sure if this will be occurring, but I know from visiting his church in the past that they have a “communion” ceremony as part of their normal Sunday rituals)
 
99% sure they won’t (unless the couple wants it). I’m not Catholic, but am LCMS Lutheran and wouldn’t partake in communion. I went to a Catholic high school so know the Church’s stance on a lot of issues. You shouldn’t partake in it since their beliefs don’t line up with the Church’s.
 
I think you need to discuss this with the groom - sooner rather than later.
 
I think there is a variety of ways to interpret this kind of thing. The question is, how strict do you want to be (and appear)? I’m sure there are a few souls on CAF would would argue that it’s not okay to attend a non-catholic church service at all. Especially one with a communion ceremony of some kind. Others would say it’s a-okay. Better to ask a priest?
 
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I think if you’re concerned about what constitutes an actual sin, better to ask your priest.

The only time I was in a wedding party, it was a non-religious wedding held at a hotel and I wasn’t practicing my faith at the time, so there was no question of religious anything coming up.
 
John64 said:
Hi all. I’m to be the best man at a friend’s wedding. He and the bride are non denominational. As a member of the wedding party, I would like to explore what pitfalls to avoid as far as participation in the ceremony is concerned.
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From time to time Catholic priests play an active role in non-Catholic marriage services. I do not see why your participation as the best man should be an issue.
John64 said:
What about if they have a ceremony involving “bread and wine”?
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It is unlikely they will have communion. It is not that common in Protestant weddings. If they do then obviously you do not receive.
 
There shouldn’t be anything to worry about when it comes to your part in the wedding party.

There’s probably a 99.9998% chance that they won’t have communion, so nothing to worry about there.
 
I agree it’s highly unlikely communion would offered but if so feel free to abstain, you wont be judged negatively for it.
 
I think there would only be an issue if the couple getting married are Catholics who have turned ND. No problem at all if the couple were non-Catholic from the beginning. If they are both baptised then the Catholic Church sees their marriage as a Sacramental marriage and just as valid as a marriage between two Catholics.
 
Beyond_Reason said:
I agree it’s highly unlikely communion would offered but if so feel free to abstain, you wont be judged negatively for it.
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I wouldn’t be so sure. I have heard of Protestants getting offended (or at least annoyed) when Catholics don’t take their communion. Especially as a member of the wedding party the couple may expect the OP to take communion if it is offered.

OP, talk to the couple.
 
Not a bad idea to talk to the couple but I’ve been to many different denominations where I was one of just a few people not taking communion (including many many catholic services) and haven’t gotten any annoyance or offense. Especially with a wedding where they should expect people from a wide variety of religious backgrounds it would be quite the fundamentalist person who would expect everyone to take communion.
 
Beyond_Reason said:
Not a bad idea to talk to the couple but I’ve been to many different denominations where I was one of just a few people not taking communion (including many many catholic services) and haven’t gotten any annoyance or offense. Especially with a wedding where they should expect people from a wide variety of religious backgrounds it would be quite the fundamentalist person who would expect everyone to take communion.
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Agreed. I have heard about it, and you are not just a guest but a member of the wedding party.
 
John64 said:
What about if they have a ceremony involving “bread and wine”? Am I correct in my understanding that I or any other Catholics in attendance ought not to participate? (I’m actually not sure if this will be occurring, but I know from visiting his church in the past that they have a “communion” ceremony as part of their normal Sunday rituals)
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Just explain that you only receive “bread and wine” within the context of Catholic “communion.”
 
TomH1 said:
It is unlikely they will have communion. It is not that common in Protestant weddings. If they do then obviously you do not receive.
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Exactly. I have never been to a wedding other than Catholic ones where Communion was offered. Especially at a non-denominational wedding, it would be almost unheard of. If by some odd chance it is offered, then you just don’t receive it.

I used to be Baptist and have been to many evangelical and non-denominational churches, and I have never seen an attitude of anyone being offended because someone chose not to receive Communion. If a person doesn’t feel right about receiving Communion for whatever reason, they would not wish that person to receive. So I wouldn’t worry about anyone judging you.

ETA: Something else I thought of: Non-denominational, Baptist, and evangelical churches do not have a Communion line. Everyone remains seated, and they pass the bread and wine (or grape juice) around on a plate. Also the wedding party normally remains standing for the entire ceremony. So that is another, practical reason why it’s very unlikely that it would be offered at a wedding–the logistics would be awkward.
 
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I’ve heard of this in Catholic weddings too, where the couple is offended that members of the wedding party don’t (at least) walk through the line and receive a blessing. They don’t like the asthetics of the wedding party “breaking up”.

I went through this for one wedding…it was awkward…one of the groomsman getting his blessing with the ring bearer.
 
TC3033 said:
I’ve heard of this in Catholic weddings too, where the couple is offended that members of the wedding party don’t (at least) walk through the line and receive a blessing. They don’t like the asthetics of the wedding party “breaking up”.
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That is unfortunate for sure. No one should be pressured into receiving Communion or even going forward for a blessing. I would guess that couple didn’t have a good grasp of what the Mass is or what the Eucharist is, because if they did, worrying about the “aesthetics” of who goes forward or doesn’t would be the last thing on their mind. :roll_eyes:
 
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Never mind, I misread something.
 
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