Attention all mothers and fathers

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Stylus

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I have a problem (Don’t we all 😛 ) My parents are very loving and protective to the point that I don’t have a job, I’m not in school and I can’t get a job because my father doesn’t want me to work in places that he feels are too unsafe. I gave up looking for work becuase I don’t have any experience. EVERYONE I talk to tells me I need to tell my parents to give me more freedom…I need to stand up to them and tell them I need to live. I can’t do that…and everyone wants me to. God wont bless me for rebelling my parents but everyone I know is frustrated with their rules. So I’m asking the advice/opinions of all good parents out there. I need to get out on my own somehow, and without dissobeying my parents. :confused:
 
your doing fine, obey them. dont listen to what other people say. your parents love you and want the best for you just as God does. good luck
 
“your doing fine, obey them. dont listen to what other people say. your parents love you and want the best for you just as God does. good luck”

…ummmm… are you nuts?

Stylus,

You need to let your parents in on a few things. The first being that they are not going to be there forever.

You are capable of thought and want to go places, meet people and do things.

In order to do that you need money.

So unless they want to fund your excursions you need to work.

You would like to do things with their knowledge/approval, but will not budge on any of these items.

Then discuss some possible jobs and make plans for going to fill out applications the next day.

It is all up to you.

Good Luck,

Ronin
 
While I can sympathize with your frustration, Stylus, I am not sure you are presenting the whole picture. From a purely objective point of view, I know there are some major pieces missing in your description. Please let me explain in a blunt, straight-forward way. I mean no offense, I would just like to help you clarify your problem.

“Attention all mothers and fathers: I have very loving parents who believe the entire world is out to get me. They believe I should never go out in the world and earn a living, I have decided not to go to school because they believe higher education will warp me and turn me into a leftist leaning liberal. All I want to do is go to work as a bomb-technician, and they won’t let me. By the way, I’m wrapped in bubble wrap at the moment.”

This is purely tongue-in-cheek. I am completely kidding! I just wanted to point out that there has to more to it than what you are presenting. Parents, by their very nature as parents, almost always want the best for their children.

My first guess is that there is a communication break down between you and your parents that needs to be resolved. I am sure they want to help you make a good way in the world. I can almost write it in stone that they want you to have a job someday and do not want to support you when you are 50.

Practice listening to your parents. Find out what they are actually saying, not what you think they might be saying. God bless you. I am sure with some effort on both sides you can all come out of this with happy results. I agree with a previous poster “EVERYONE” is usually wrong. Your parents are on your side in this.
 
You don’t mention how old you are, so it’s a little hard to know what advice would be appropriate.
There’s a big difference between 16 or 17 and 25.
My oldest son left home when he was about 21, I didn’t want him to go but he felt he had to get out on his own. He lived in a ratty room he rented half a mile away, and delivered laundry for a living. I was so worried about it I bought batteries for the smoke detector there. I think I’m overprotective too, but at that age a young man can leave if he wants to.
Noiw he’s 29, supporting himself fairly well, and living in a nice house with several other guys. We get along great.
Talk to your parents and ask them what they recommend. Surely they don’t want you to be a couch potato. Maybe they could help you find some kind of apprenticeship work. Or maybe there’s a school to work program in your local community college, that would prepare you for a trade you’d be interested in.
 
My parenrs were so the same. No can’t get a job there because they don’t like the hours, location, etc. I was old enough to get married but still had an 11pm curfew. Solution: I moved out. I know it’s hard for some to believe but there are some really obsessive parents out there. I got a job at a bakery at 17 and wasn’t allowed to do it because they didn’t want me starting at 8am since I’d have to take the bus. Every job I got, there was a safety reason I couldn’t do it. Even babysitting because ‘you don’t know if the child’s father is going to be ok’. My father opposed me going to university because academic women are unfeminine and he hates them (his words were stronger). My mother supported me to go but it was easier after I moved out.

So everyone - how about taking this posters post at face value and giving her(?) the benefit of the doubt? Some parents are simply over-protective.
 
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mumto5:
So everyone - how about taking this posters post at face value and giving her(?) the benefit of the doubt? Some parents are simply over-protective.
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Good point. I will remember that.

Gotta love you Brits and Aussies… “opposed me going to university…” You speak (and write) the language so beautifully!
 
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LittleDeb:
Good point. I will remember that.

Gotta love you Brits and Aussies… “opposed me going to university…” You speak (and write) the language so beautifully!
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New Zealander 😉 British would have been nice though 🙂
 
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Viki59:
You don’t mention how old you are, so it’s a little hard to know what advice would be appropriate. There’s a big difference between 16 or 17 and 25.
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Quite so. If you’re reached the age of majority, you do not owe your parents obedience. To quote the CCC: “Obedience toward parents ceases with the emancipation of the children; not so respect, which is always owed to them. This respect has its roots in the fear of God, one of the gifts of the Holy Spirit.”

IOW: If you’re an adult, act like one. If you’re not, do what you’re told.

– Mark L. Chance.
 
Welcome to the club!! My parents don’t want me to get a job, let alone have a cell phone @ all, claiming they only want what’s best for me. How depressing is that?
 
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777:
Welcome to the club!! My parents don’t want me to get a job, let alone have a cell phone @ all, claiming they only want what’s best for me. How depressing is that?
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Then that’s probably what’s best for you.
It’s depressing that your parents want what’s best for you? :confused:

Contrary to what our culture says, cell phones are not a divine right that a child aquires when they reach the age of reason. :rolleyes:
 
Ouch! And I thought my parents were bad!

My parents didn’t want me to get a job (I was about 17 at the time). My mother’s main concern was because I was still in school, she wanted me to finish before I devoted time to working, other than that she would have been fine with it (and I was allowed to volunteer at my church and local hospital- which I did). My dad just didn’t want me to work because “girls shouldn’t have to work (when they go to school)”. 🙂
Now that I have a job (I’m 19 now, out of school, and looking to get into college), my parents were glad I waited. My dad now teases me by calling him and myself “working men”. 😃
You say you aren’t in school- you do need a job!! If you think about it, every occupation and work environment is unsafe, anything can happen. whether it be bad or good. I think you need to stand up for yourself, because this is your life, and their over protectiveness (God bless them for caring though!!) of your parents, if allowed to go on like this, will ruin your future of independence.
God bless you!
-Not a mother or father- 😛
 
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Consecrated:
Then that’s probably what’s best for you.
It’s depressing that your parents want what’s best for you? :confused:

Contrary to what our culture says, cell phones are not a divine right that a child aquires when they reach the age of reason. :rolleyes:
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not if the cell 'phone was for emergencies. And be sides, I am 41.
 
777 said:
41.
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:rotfl: well I would say BUY YOUR OWN CELL PHONE, GET A JOB & CUT THE APRON STRINGS!
But I was asking the OP how old he or she was.
 
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777:
not if the cell 'phone was for emergencies. And be sides, I am 41.
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:eek:
Please pardon me for making assumptions.
I think you are quite old enough to be making your own decisions. 😛

But my statement still stands (even though it doesn’t apply to 777) Children (~18 y.o and under) do not have a “right” to a cell phone, or their own income, or even “going out” on weekends. These things are all privileges which the parent may revoke for good reasons. And I think the majority of the time, parents DO have good reasons. (mum’s case excepted!)

As for the op, be very wary of taking “everyone’s” advice over the rule of your parents. I know it’s hard when other adults you respect tell you your parents are wrong, but it’s usually the safest course to follow parents first.

But then, are you in the general “minor” age range? And you should at least be getting some sort of education or doing something productive with your time.
 
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777:
not if the cell 'phone was for emergencies. And be sides, I am 41.
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Excuse me, but I thought you were married and expecting quads??
If you aren’t then you need to grow up and stop pretending you are something you are not. Your behavior is that of a 2 y/o
~ Kathy ~
 
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